UNDERCARD MATCHES:
-WAFFLE HOUSE pinned ROAST BOUNTY in 2:14.
-HAARLEM HEAT defeated THE ILLUSTRATORS in 3:19.
-DUH CHEE pinned AMOEBA in 3:33.
-THE PILLARS OF PAIN defeated THE BAGGY PANTS PLAYERS in 24 seconds.
-GRIMACE defeated DRUNK THE CLOWN in 1:54 by countout after Drunk ran
from the ring, claiming to be chased by an elephant.
More Plague: he locates Joe the Giant's locker room. Plague bangs on the door, and after several seconds, Joe answers. Plague says they need to talk business. Always the gracious host, Joe allows Plague in the locker room to hear what the bemuscled British native has to say.
THE MATCHES PEOPLE PAID TO SEE:
-URSA put a swift, brutal end to GRADE-A WOMAN's two-day Women's championship
reign by pinning her in 9:12, following a Krypton legsweep.
-VENOM proved why he is the dominant cruiserweight in the world today, and challenger XOOSE proved why he is always near the bottom of the cruiserweight rankings. The champion made him look a right chump, dazzling Xoose (as well as the audience) with top rope maneuvers and hard hitting mat action. Near the ned, venom floored Xoose with a moonsault converted into a kneedrop, nailing the fallen challenger right on. A Camel Clutch was clamped on for good measure, and Xoose had no choice but to tap out. Venom is your winner in 4:58.
JOE THE GIANT and PLAGUE leave Joe's locker room, apparently happy with the deal they struck. Between laughs, they make some references about going to PWL President GENE WEST and North American champion COOLEROY to confirm the deal.
-World tag team champions STRIKE FORCE (BEAST and CARNAGE) seem to have settled into their role as the team to beat in the PWL, whether or not they have the championship gold. This time 'round, the cocky NC-17 (DIRK MERCURY and TRIPLE X) made an attempt to wrest the straps away from the tag kingpins. The challengers attacked before the opening bell, which may seem like a smart thing to do, but because they did this to Strike Force, they only succeeded in angry-ing up the blood of the champions. Beast and Carnage turned the tables in no time, and they beat down NC-17 with a flurry of punches, kicks, and a particularly popular move with the fans, a double headbutt to poor Dirk Mercury. As he dropped to the floor, seemingly unconscious, Beast and Carnage readied the X-Man for his impending demise. Eliminator, splat-goes-X, Carnage makes the cover, the rest can be easily figured out. Time of the massacre was 1:16. As the Force gloated in the ring with their belts, Beast wielded the mic, and challenged any tag team in the back to come out for another beat down, as the chmps wanted to give fans a little something extra. Immediately, HAARLEM HEAT stormed the ring, at least as best they could. Both Brian and Larry were met jaw punches, courtesy of the Force's manager, KHAINE. After this display of violence, the Heat scurried to back, holding their faces and screaming. Beast, carnage, Khaine, and the fans enjoyed a hearty laugh as the champions and their manager walked to back for further celebration.
GENE WEST, COOLEROY, PLAGUE, and JOE THE GIANT walk to the ring. West takes the microphone and says he has an announcement. "Ladies and gentlemen, we all came here expecting to see Plague fight Fat Albert, and Joe the Giant take on Cooleroy for the North American title. Well, there has been a slight change in the format, but I am sure you'll all be pleased with the changes. Joe the Giant has generously offered to give Plague the North American title shot. In exchange, Plague has agreed to give Joe a ten-pound sack of potatoes and a six-pack of beer." The fans cheer, knowing they would accept the same offer. "After discussing this with the champion, Cooleroy, he has agreed to fight Plague, rather than Joe, coming up next on the card. There we go, it seems that everybody's a winner tonight!" As the fans continue their cheering, Fat Albert's entrance music kicks up, and by gum, FAT ALBERT does indeed make his entrance to said music. He steps in the ring, and west hand s him the microphone. "Hey hey hey! You say that everybody's happy, but where do I fit in here? I was supposed to wrestle Plague here this evening, and you know I ain't even gonna bother showing up if I don't have to do anything. What am I gettin' outta this, man?" Gene West takes back the microphone. "Albert, you are absolutely right, sir. Well, how about this: in exchange for giving up your matych tonight, here's something special, a one-time-only deal for you and you alone." West pauses, then continues. "Instead of wrestling Plague, we'll open the post-match, backstage bar just for you, right now! Any drink you want, and it's yours for the taking, my friend!" The crowd gasps, knowing the history behind West's disapproval of Fat Albert drinking before the card ends. Without hesitation, Albert says, "Hey hey hey! Look out back there, I'm getting pissed today!" he high-fives all the assembled wrestling personalities in the ring, and runs to the backstage area, faster than most crusierwerights could. With everybody happy, we go back to mat action.
-COOLEROY made a fantastic showing in his first title defense as North American champion. Former champion PLAGUE, however, didn't make all these agreements to walk away empty-handed, and he went to work. The match was extremely competitive, and Cooleroy secured a series of two-counts on the big man. Cooleroy slammed Plague, and attempted a kneedrop. Ever aware, Plague rolled out of the way, and Cooleoy crashed to the mat knee-first. As he rolled around in pain, Plague seized the opportunity, flattening the champion with a big splash. With Cooleroy prone on the mat, Plague wowed everybody in the crowd by climbing the ropes. He leaped off and connected with a top-rope legdrop. Even a talented worker such as Cooleroy is no match for that, and three slaps of the ref's hand later, Plague is once again the PWL North American champion, as well as automatic number one contender to the World heavyweight championship. Time of the match was 10:35.
-Seeing as how two of the three championships that changed hands on
July 4th had changed hands on July 6th, you don't think we'd would see
a three-for-three championship change here again, do you? World heavyweight
champion SETH meets the rematch challenge of THE TERROR. Seth takes
control at the opening bell, hammering the challenger with several shots
to the jaw. Seth continues the onslaught for several minutes, but
the momentum switches as Seth attempts a running forearm on Terror.
As Seth bounces off the ropes, his leg is met by the clasped hands of Terror's
sidekick DARK ANGEL. As Seth falls to the mat face-first, all Terror
needs to do is slap on the good ole Terror Spike, but he decides not to,
as that is what the fans are expecting, as he doesn't want to do anything
the fans want to see. Instead, terror hits the DDT prfectly, and
Seth falls to the mat in a crumpled heap. He picks up the champion,
lifts him into the suplex position, but instead drops Seth to the canvas
face-first. Terror rolls the champion over, and the referee makes
the count. One, two, three! Ah, what joy, as the winner, and
once again, YOUR PWL WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION, THE TERROR! The
show ends much the same way the June 19 Terror win did, with the champion
and his cronies littering the ring with their soda and cereal entrails.