THOUGHTS OF LITTLE CHILDREN
AND OF BIG MEN !
Music
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~ DADDY'S ~
HAND
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IT HAS BEEN SAID: " A PENNEY FOR YOUR THOUGHTS ! "
~ GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE ~
THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED AND LAUGHED ABOUT:
~ LIGHTNING ~
"
A little girl walked daily to and from school. Though the weather that
morning was questionable and clouds were forming, she made her daily trek to
the elementary school. As the afternoon progressed, the winds whipped up,
along with thunder and lightning. The mother of the little girl felt
concerned that her daughter would be frightened as she walked home from
school, and she herself feared that the electrical storm might harm her
child.
Following the roar of thunder, lightning, like a flaming sword, would cut
through the sky. Full of concern, the mother quickly got into her car and
drove along the route to her child's school. As she did so, she saw her
little girl walking along, but at each flash of lightning, the child would
stop, look and smile. Another and another were to follow quickly, each with
the little girl stopping, looking at the streak of light and smiling.
Finally, the mother called her over to the car and asked, "What are you
doing?" The child answered, "God just keeps taking pictures of me,"
Lord, help me to trust You as much as this little one, especially when the storms of life crash around me.
God Bless you today, whatever storm you are facing!
~ Thanks, Lil Brudder ~
~
For your help !
1. No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2.
When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3.
If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.4.
Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5.
You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6.
Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.7.
Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
8.
Puppies still have bad breath, even after eating a tic-tac.9.
Never hold a Dust Buster and a cat at the same time.
10.
School lunches stick to the wall.
11.
You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
12.
Don't wear polka dot underwear under white shorts.
13.
The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.
~ GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE ~
THAT BIG MEN HAVE LEARNED AND LAUGHED ABOUT:
NO BULL ? ? ? ?
Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch.
Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble.
In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase
a bull so that they can breed their own stock. Upon leaving, the brunette
tells her sister, " When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll
contact you to drive out after me and haul it home. " The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, " I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home. " The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, " It's just 99 cents a word. " Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word " comfortable " The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, " comfortable ? " The brunette explains, " My sister's blonde. She'll read it slow. "
( " COM - FOR - DA - BUL " )
" MY SISTER "
Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool?
I found the best way to get rid of a telemarketer. Ask them what they are
wearing.
Why is it when snooty department stores put their Christmas decorations
out just after the 4th of July, it's "elegant foresight"; but when I
leave my Christmas lights up until April, my neighbors just think I'm
tacky?
If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags," and the Tampa
Bay
Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does that make the Tennessee
Titans?
Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those little
bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards.
A couple with three children waited in line at San Francisco's Pier 41 to
purchase tickets for a boat trip to Alcatraz. Others watched with varying
degrees of sympathy and irritation as the young children fidgeted,
whined, and punched one another. The frazzled parents reprimanded them
to no avail. Finally, they reached the ticket window. "Five tickets,
please," the father said. "Two round trip, three one way."
If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea . . . does that mean that 1
person in 5 enjoys it?
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I welcome your comments
PASTOR BILL
~ A. K. A. ~
