Christy stared at the diamond ring. Her students had just abandoned the schoolhouse, leaving the young teacher to her own thoughts. She was disturbed. She had no idea what to do. It had been two days since David's proposal. This was certainly not substantial time to decide whether she would spend the rest of her life with this man! She so wanted to love David in a romantic way. But she did not. And that was a reality she had to face. She loved him as a Christian, as a dear friend, as a person, as a Knight in Shining Armor.
But she would be happy with him, wouldn't she? Christy found herself doubting even that. David was always so nice and charming. But she felt he was talking down to her sometimes, as one would a child. That made her bristle in her seat. But he was just protecting her, wasn't he?
Christy sighed inwardly. Silence enveloped the schoolhouse which had been bustling with activity moments before. As long as she was with the children there was little to no time for her to think about David.
And Neil. The thought of the doctor made her look at the ring more skeptically. She had told David she was reconsidering when she ran after him. It had made David exuberant and completely thrilled. All David wanted was her. That was all. It was so simple what David wanted. Christy had no doubt in her mind she would have said 'yes' to David in an instant had she not met Neil.
But she had met him. She had fallen in love with him. The thought which should have brought her great joy sorrowed her. Her heart could not deny her feelings of love for the doctor. It was impossible. Oh, how could she deal with this?
A hand lightly touched her shoulder and she nearly jumped out of her chair. A low chuckle was heard and she recognized the masculine voice quickly. She would know the Scottish brogue anywhere. He even wore the accent in his laugh.
"Are ye allright?" asked the doctor.
Christy looked up at him and he could not hide the amusement with her from creeping into his intense eyes. She tensed at his laughing at her, so she felt, and he noticed.
"I did na mean to make ye uncomfortable," the doctor apologized.
Christy shook her head and stuffed away the ring. "Forget it."
"Grantland's ring?" Neil asked.
She heard how quiet his voice was and looked at him. She could practically see the veil drop over his hazel eyes. Christy nodded, ignoring the odd behavior. "Yes," she said simply. "But you didn't come to see a ring. What can I do for you?"
"Actually, I wanted t' speak with ye," Neil admitted.
Christy braced herself, anxious to not get into a conversation she felt was not going to make her very comfortable. "OK," she agreed reluctantly.
"And I need t' stock the mission so can ye come with me?"
Christy dared to meet his eyes again. Oh, she wanted to talk to him! She wanted to confide in him, feel as comfortable as she use to. But it was not going to come. Not easily. Christy remembered, turning warm as she did, when he held her in his arms what seemed like an eternity ago. Yet it seemed like yesterday at the same time. So much had happened. She could not decide if the time was moving quickly or slowly. Both. How did that happen?
"And off ye go again."
Christy blushed as she realized Neil was teasing her about her tendency to go off into her own world full of thoughts. Neil grinned at her to see the beautiful light pink creep on her soft cheeks. "I'm sorry," she apologized.
"Nay," Neil objected. "Don't apologize. I think I'm use to it."
This made Christy flush further. Why must I act like such an blundering fool around him? she wondered. The answer was obvious and she almost blushed deeper. But being around Neil so often, she had begun to learn how to disguise her emotions. But he still usually saw straight through it. He probably always did but just did not always voice what he noticed for her sake.
"Well, that's wonderful to know," Christy said sarcastically. But she was slightly amused and her twitching lips proved to that. She was nervous about being alone with him but rose anyway. "I should get down to the mission anyway."
"Great," Neil replied.
Christy left the schoolhouse, closing and locking the doors behind them. Her palms were embarassingly sweating as she fumbled with the keys to lock the double doors. She drew a quiet breath from deep within and drew strength from the same Source she had the day before. It was hard to concentrate while Neil stood so close! Christy mentally chastised herself for letting him affect her so, and a married man, too! She forced herself to ignore his presence momentarily and concentrated on not looking like a complete fool. She locked the doors then turned to Neil with more bravery than she really felt.
"OK," Christy said quietly, agreeing to go.
Neil slapped himself inwardly for all but staring at her. He ripped his eyes away from hers. He saw something unfathomable in them. Neil was disappointed his own thoughts were screaming at him since his overworked mind was preventing him from analyzing Christy's mind as he usually did. He could always read in her eyes what she was thinking but his wildly fleeting mind kept him from his normal observations of her. She was an amazingly perplex young woman, yet so simple. How could Christy be both at the same time? She was somehow.
They began walking in silence and Christy wondered at this. He had said he wanted to talk to her. So why not talk? They were halfway down the incline from the schoolhouse/church to the mission house when she finally decided to say something about it.
"You know, Neil," Christy said, taking on a comfortable teasing tone that was not like her usual self. Usually, she was so serious. The stress of the past few days, since Margaret's second appearance, had caused a slight change in the teacher's demeanor. She wanted to run and hide and took on a more offensive position than she usually did. Her slight sarcasm was revealed through her voice. "If someone says they want to talk then it generally includes words are said."
Neil glanced at her in surprise but she was avoiding his gaze. It was so unlike her to start a conversation as he did. Perhaps he was influencing and he was not certain that was a good thing. "Aye, that it does," Neil agreed.
She heard amusement in his voice with her for her statement and it annoyed her. She was feeling especially irritable since David's proposal. She knew she loved Neil. She knew she could never have Neil. That only added to her irritation with him for seeming to not take her seriously but more as an amusing way to pass time.
She wanted to be the one winning an argument with him. He would usally end up agreeing with her, to an extent, after a while. But she could hardly remember a time when a 'discussion' with him ended with her not fuming and wanting to shake sense into him. He infuriated her. Christy stiffened at hearing his tone.
"For once, could you take me seriously?" she tossed back.
Again, Neil was surprised with her slight hostility. He was use to them blasting each other but never had she started it purposely. Christy always began being patient and kind but this time was different. "I always take you seriously."
"What did you want to say?" Christy asked almost impatiently, not commenting on his statement.
Neil looked at her and took in a breath. "About two days ago."