Christy watched Neil leave, regretting having not demanded he not draw away from her as he had. But she knew he was upset, too. She did not have the heart to push him. Neither, she meekly admitted, did she have the bravery.
Christy turned away from the window and sighed inwardly. She moved to her office and sat at her desk. She caught herself staring out another window at the beautiful, nearly summer day. It was common for her to drift off places in her active imagination. Neil's previous statement about her going off into her own world proved how publicly known it was. But she had never had such a hard time before controlling her thoughts, nor when she drifted off.
Christy glanced down at the sketchpad laying on the wooden desk, staring up at her. She laughed at herself inwardly for thinking a pad of paper was staring at her. But the truth was she was so stressed she would probably think water was staring at her. These ridiculous thoughts caused her to blush girlishly and she buried her face behind her hand, resting her chin on her hand as an excuse. No one was there. But she had found Neil watching her so many times before that it was almost instinct now to cover her face when her cheeks warmed.
"Christy?" came a familiar, gently masculine voice. "Can I come in?"
The said turned to her door. Her cheeks, lightly tinted with crimson just minutes ago, were their normal tone again, much to Christy's relief. "David, of course," she permitted hastily.
David came in. He was again pleasantly startled by the beauty of such a woman as Christy against the backdrop of the Smoky Mountains. The two beauties put together threatened to steal his breath. David paced himself and calmed his heartbeat before taking another step. Why must she have such an effect on him? David wanted to be a suave, refined *man* around her and not a schoolboyish young man struck by Cupid. But, still, her just sitting in the chair at her desk was a menace to his composure.
Stop it, Grantland, the young parson chided himself in his thoughts.
"I, um... I wanted to talk to you," David said. Christy became wary of what was coming next considering what happened with the doctor when he led off that way. "About my proposal."
Christy knew it. She just had known it was about that day. Why else would be look so nervous? Of course she had known. She decided to take the defensive with David, still touchy about it. She had been very moody lately, everyone had noticed.
"David, I told you I needed time," Christy told him not too gently.
"I'm not asking you for an answer now, Christy," David said in a gentle tone, not reprimanding her, or even trying to, for her tone. He knew what a strain his proposal and the doctor's inopportune timing had put on her.
Christy visibly relaxed. "Oh," she said softly.
David took that as the apology she meant it to be. He accepted it. "I just wanted to give you food for thought," David said. He saw her start, beginning to protest and put up a hand as he knelt next to her chair. "I'm not saying anything against anyone for any reason in any way," David assured her vehemently.
She, once again, relaxed. "All right," she agreed.
"I've been thinking a lot about you and Cutter Gap," David said. "You always have loved this place so much. I mean, you gave up your family, your friends, the only thing you ever knew as your life to teach these children. Everything that was familiar to you, you left for this place. And you've stayed here because this is where you call home. And you know how much I feel the need to get out of here. I don't have your patience, compassion, or tolerance. All I have is the Bible, and I'm not so sure about my faith at the moment. Which is wrong, I know, but it's still how I feel. But you're worth anything, Christy."
Christy was anxious to know what David was getting at. "What are you saying?" she prompted.
"If you tell me you will marry me, I promise to you I won't leave Cutter Gap, or even mention it, until you're ready," David said. There. The fateful words had finally come out. He saw a welcome change in her face instantly from his news. "I love you too much to let a simple community you want to stay in that I don't come between us. It just wouldn't be fair."
"Oh, David," Christy whispered. "Do you mean it?"
David nodded. He was pleased with her reaction. "I wouldn't lie to you, Christy. I mean every word. *Every* word," he emphasized.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Dr.MacNeill left the mission house a troubled man, a troubled man indeed. Christy's doe-like eyes had tickled at the armor around his heart and implored him silently to tell her what was going on. Neil had found it hard to leave her behind, almost impossible in fact. Especially with that hormonal, immature reverend living with her. Neil had always hated Christy living with Grantland, or, more accurately, Grantland living with Christy. There was a difference to Neil.
The doctor imagined her eyes and barely ducked a branch in time to prevent it from knocking him out of his saddle. He grumbled to himself in irritation. Neil was well aware of what Christy did to him, this close encounter with a branch only serving as evidence. He wanted to either embrace it wholeheartedly or run from it, like a coward, but this in-between, neutral position was killing him. He had to do something. But he did not know what. Hopefully, Christy would turn David down. Neil wanted her happy, he really wanted her happy, but he did not want her married to a man he knew would make her unhappy eventually. Neil audibly sighed in annoyance with himself for accidentally thinking these thoughts for the literal hundredth time in the past two days.
Neil thought of his wife. The thought of her being his wife still made him angry to this day. Margaret. She was selfishly spoiled and had no desire to do any good with her life like Christy did. Neil determinedly attempted at pushing the vibrant teacher from Asheville out of his mind. But a space as big as the one a certain, barely twenty year old young woman filled was hard to refill with other thoughts.
"Pull yourself together, man!"
The sound of his own voice speaking the words aloud startled him. Neil had not even realized he spoke until he heard his voice break the silence. Neil grumbled, vexed with himself for allowing a woman to enter his mind and, yes, his heart like Christy Rudd Huddleston had. He had never intended to get close to her. It had just happened. He loved her. It was that simple.... that bewildering.
Neil stuffed down her memory best he could. That's what he needed to make her. A memory. As Margaret was. But even the memories one thought to be long buried could come back with startling clarity. Neil had learned his lesson before.
He also learned such a memory as Christy was hard to push away. Especially when she lived but a few miles away.
The good doctor concentrated on Margaret. She was in need of health help whether she admitted it or not. She may have looked like she was doing well when dancing at The Tea Place but not now. The stress of returning to Cutter Gap proudly marked her face, caustically defying her firm denial of problems. Neil wryly laughed at himself for thinking something like wrinkles on Margaret's face as being alive and mocking him and her. The stress was starting to get to him, too. Margaret's stress was lowering her immune system's ability to defend her thin body against the horrible tuberculosis. Her once beautiful face was covered in make-up while she tried to refuse existence to her fatigue and illness.
Neil knew what he had to do.