It's
Happening...
Every Mom's Concern:
Protecting Your Children from Television Violence
Why my kids will never watch
America’s Most Wanted by
SJO
Spent Cartridge Crafts You Can Start Right Now
Why spend all that money for a new brass lamp when all those cartridges are lying there on
the bank floor? They, too, are "free money." St. Paul’s WonderMom, Sara
Jane Olson shows you how easy it is. (Psssst. A little secret she’s too modest to
tell… She even made her daughters’ orthodontic braces!]
Luck
of the Draw?
Sara Jane Olson, upstanding, upscale St. Paul doctor’s wife finds herself arrested
and accused of being some 70’s era terrorist she never heard of before.
Panic-stricken, desperate, she uses her one telephone call from jail to hire an attorney
– no, two attorneys. And, without explanation, she ends up with the two very same Bay
Area lawyers who represented at least three of the real SLA terrorists over 2,000 miles
away! "Defies the odds," say statisticians. "Uncanny, but who cares,"
say supporters.
I Want My Name Back!
Attempted presidential assassin, Sara Jane Moore has been rotting in jail for 25 years
just because her gun accidentally went off while she was cleaning it in front of San
Francisco’s Fairmont Hotel while Gerald Ford was strolling by. "I don’t
mind being locked up, but now I discover that some trollop in the Midwest stole my name
and is using it to sell cookbooks," says the unlucky revolutionary. "I’m
mad."
Mad Money
We’re not saying you are, but let’s pretend you were one of four bank robber who
robbed a bank in, say April 1975. Carmichael, California – just for the sake of
argument. And say, after expenses, you netted $15,247. And say you invested in
Microsoft…
DISCLAIMER
Safehouse Beautiful,
Anarchist Cookbook2 and There's a Nail in My Soup are satire. Even the objects of satire
are entitled to a fair trial. We want the objects of satire to have a fair trial.
We've wanted it for 24 years.
. . .
In the meantime,
We're Not
Stupid
You won't be either if you
read Lektrik Press & Soliah.com everyday
YOUR LETTERS
Safehouse Beautiful
in the News
St.
Paul Pioneer Press
Los Angeles Times
Los Angeles Times |
|
| There
Goes the Neighborhood |
| The Symbionese Liberation Army safehouse has come to St. Paul –
far from its humble beginnings on W Street in Sacramento, California. Aside from an
abundance of banks and a large, gullible, amoral jury pool, why did the SLA pick the Twin
Cities? Terrorist emeritus Kathleen Soliah takes us on a tour of the tony tudor, with its
state-of-the-art LAPD-proof fire sprinkler system and gun-cabinet space
galore. |
|
| "Sure, it’s roomier," says a wistful Kathy.
"Instead of a one-getaway-car garage, I have a two; instead of flushing evidence down
one toilet, I can use three. But, deep down inside, it hasn’t changed me. I’m
still the same person I always was." You
tell’em, girl.
|
Face it, guilt is for losers. But if you find yourself coming down with a case of those
bourgeois blues, just practice this 10-minute Minnehogwash Meditation and you’ll put
the self back in your self-esteem in no time at all…
It’s not my
fault…. Hey, that’s their problem…. It's not like she was going
to live forever... I’ve already suffered enough…
There... don't you feel better?
Will
the Real Me Stand Up?
Face it. Three weeks out of the month, everyone thinks you’re Martha Stewart.
It’s that Eric Rudolph week that’s so hard to get through. This issue of Safehouse
Beautiful has some explosive new ideas for relieving the tension and blowing off
steam – and, of course, not getting caught.
Bomb
appetite!
The SLA cookbook is finally here... |
|
The critics have nothing but praise for
There's a Nail in my Soup... Bomb appetite! -- The New York Times
I wish I'd known about that habaneros
and diesel fuel thing she does... -- Tim McVeigh
My sources tell
me that Clinton traded two of these secret recipes to the Red Chinese for campaign funds -- Matt Drudge |
Look at these explosive favorites...
Jail House Hotdish Tuna fish and a metal
file never tasted so good...
Death-to-the-Fascist-Insect-that-Preys-on-
the-Life-of-the-People Jello Salad Lime gelatin, C4 and shredded carrots that will blow
the wheels off a HumVee...
| And
the SLA's most famous specialty...
Pigs in a Blanket |
 |
If terrorism is your cup of tea, these
field-tested, kitchen-to-undercarriage recipes will make your mouth water.
|
| When
those unexpected guests drop in . . . . |
|
. . . . do what we do
T A K
E O U T |
Drop us a
line
|
