Forever Knight

Nerd School

"I goin' to scho-ol!  I goin' to scho-ol!"  Donny Knight sang as he followed his brother Joey down the hall to the bathroom.

"No, you're not!"  Seven year old Joey told his three year old brother.  "Besides, it's not a real school anyway.  It's only a Pre School."

"It's still school!"  Donny insisted.

"No, it's not."

"Is too!"

"Is NOT!"

"IS TOO!"

"Excuse me, you slugs, but if you're gonna stand here arguing all day, I gotta get ready for school."  Nattie Knight, Joey's twin sister, said as she pushed her brothers aside and closed the bathroom door.  "After all, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do"

"Now see what you done, ya little squirt."  Joey said.  "She's gonna be in there all day."

"Me?  You're ta blame too."  Donny squealed angrily at his older brother.  "Why don't we use the baffroom in Mommy and Daddy's room?"

"Okay."

The boys stopped outside the closed master bedroom door. 

"Mommy's in there."  Joey said.  "She'll be in there all day too." 

"Women!"  Donny folded his arms across his chest. "Can't live wif' em.  Can't live wif'out 'em."  He huffed.

"How about we use Grandfather's bathroom in the cellar?  He won't mind.  He's not even here."  Joey took his brother's hand and led him to the basement door.

"Okay."

**********

"C'mon you two, we'll be late."  Nattie yelled through the closed bathroom door.  "And they talk about us women dawdling."  She said to Toni, her mother.

"I'm not joking, boys."  Toni called.  "You've been in there a good half hour.  If you aren't out in two minutes, I'm coming in."  She fingered the master key in her hand.

Exactly one minute and forty-five seconds later, Joey and Donny opened the door.  They both had been washed and dressed, but both of them had their hair plastered down with at least half a bottle of holding gel each, and they both reeked of after shave.

"MARCH!"  Toni ordered, grabbing each of her sons by the nearest available ear and pushing them back into the lavatory.  "Nattie, go to their room and get another change of clothes for these two ... two ... "  She let out a loud sigh.

"But Mom!"  Joey protested.  "We just wanted to look our best for school."

"You look like something Charlie wouldn't even bury behind the garage."  Toni said as she leaned Joey over the basin and poured shampoo on his hair.  "And you ... "  She pointed to Donny, who was sitting hunched over on the toilet seat trying to look invisible.  " ... You smell even worse." 

"He made me do it."  Donny complained.  "He said it would make me just like all growned up.  He said that Grandfavver uses this stuff all the time and Grandma loves it."

**********

"Do we hafta ride?"  Joey said as Toni herded her children to the car.

"After all, it's not like this is the first day for us."  Nattie argued.

"Yeah. We've been going to school for two weeks already."  Joey continued.

"We know the way.  We won't get lost."  Nattie added.

"And it ain't that far."  Joey continued.

"And we'll even hold hands."

"And look both ways at the street corners."

"And there's safety patrols at the busy streets"

"And besides it ain't like we're little kids no more."  Joey concluded.

"We're seven!"  They both chimed in unison. 

"And we ARE in the third grade now!"  Nattie emphasized.

"Well ... "  Toni forgot that to children that age, a moment's hesitation was the same as whole hearted approval.

"Thanks, Mommy."  The twins called as they headed down the block. 

"We'll come straight home afterward."  Nattie called over her left shoulder.

"We promise."  Joey called over his right.

As soon as they were out of sight of their mother, Joey dropped his sister's hand.  "Don't walk with me and pretend you don't even know me."  He ordered.

"But Mommy said ... "

"I don't care.  I ain't gonna be seen with no GIRL."  Joey sneered.  "Even if she is only my sister."  He stuck his nose into the air and stomped off.

**********

She pulled up to the school and opened the passenger side door for Donny.  She held out her hand to him.

"Mommy, can I go in all by myself?  I'm a big boy now."  Donny asked plaintively.

"Well, okay, but I'll be right behind you.  Just in case."

"Okay."

About halfway to the building, Donny stopped.  He waited until his mother caught up with him and held his hand to her.  "I'll go wif' you."  He said solemnly. "Just so's you won't be scared."

Once inside, Toni checked the bulletin board for Donny's room number.   As they approached the room, Donny spotted a familiar boy going inside.  "He was in daycare wif' me."  He explained to Toni.  "Can I go wif' him?"

Toni nodded.

"Hey, Travis, wait up for me."  Donny called as he ran after his friend.

Toni stood at the door and watched her son play with the other children.  Although he had only been here only a few minutes, he had already made several friends and was helping the teacher pass out toys to the other children.  He seemed to naturally take on the role of a leader. At times like this, Toni had to remind herself that he was only three, and not thirty three.

"You're welcome to stay and watch for a while."  Ms. Phillips, Donny's teacher said.  She was a petite black woman, and looked to be in her early twenties.  Toni guessed she was right out of college. "Sometimes it helps make the transition easier."

"No, thank you."  Toni replied.  "I'd like to stay but I have to get to work.  I'm an artist and right now, I'm hip deep in a promotion layout for United Studios.  They're kicking off their media campaign for a new TV show called 'Love Bites' today.  It stars Preston Widgett and Laurie Anderson. I've got to be there."

"I've heard of Laurie Anderson before.  Wasn't she in that series ... what was it called ... Buddies?  But who's Preston Widgett?"

"He hasn't had much exposure to television, unfortunately.  He has played Vegas quite a few times, though. Right now, he's the comedian in residence at the Comedy Store.  He's really good, too.  If you get the chance, you ought to go see him.  If you want, I'll see if I can get you some free passes."

"I'd like that.  I'll be looking for the show in the lineup.  Don't worry, I'm sure Donald will be all right."

"He likes to be called Donny."

"Thanks. I'll remember that."

**********

Joey crossed the last street before the school.  There was only a half a block more to go.  Nattie, obeying orders, was about ten paces behind him. 

On the corner, Butch Palermo was talking to one of first grade boys.  Behind him, as always, was Jeremy Packard, his shadow.  Butch was a fourth grader, tall and heavy set for his age.  He was more or less the school bully.  Jeremy was thin and awkward, a classic wannabe.  "C'mon, Twinkie, I ain't got all day."  Butch said, pressing the youngster against a parked car.  "Cough up your lunch money and I won't have to hurt you too much."

"Yeah.  We don't have all day."  Jeremy echoed.

"I d-d-don't ha-have no mon-money.  I'm n-not buy-buy-ing m-m-my lunch today."  The boy stuttered.  "My m-mo-mommy p-packed it f-f-for me."

"G-g-good for you."  Butch mocked.  "Let me see it."

The boy handed Butch his lunch box.  Butch took out the sandwich and apple and threw them on the ground.  Hard.  The apple broke in several pieces.  Then he ground them with his foot.  He took the carton of juice and spilled it on the mashed food.  .  "Oh gee, look what I just did."  He said sarcastically. "Now you can't even eat that.  Sorry, Twinkie.  I guess you'll just have to go hungry."  Finally, he flung the lunch box against a pole several times until it broke into several pieces.  "And I guess your m-m-mommy will have to buy you a new lunch box, too.  Maybe tomorrow you'll remember your money."

"Don't forget."  Jeremy called as the boy ran to the playground in tears.

"Why don't you stop bullying people?"  Joey said, standing face to chest with Butch.  Although Joey was only a grade behind Butch, he over a foot shorter.  Most of the other third graders were one to two years older than the twins.  Because they both had IQ's in the genius range, they were permitted to start first grade at five instead of seven.

"And who's gonna stop me?  You, Twinkie?"  Butch bending so he was nose to nose with him.

Joey balled his fist at his side.  "Maybe."  He said, looking defiantly at Butch. 

Jeremy started to back away.

"You guys got a problem?"  A safety patrol stood behind the pair.  All of the safety patrol members were sixth graders.

"No problem."  Joey said.

"No problem."  Butch confirmed.

"None."  Jeremy said as he headed for the school building.

Just then, the school bell rang.

"You ain't seen the last of this, Twinkie."  Butch hissed at Joey and began walking toward the schoolyard.

"You shouldn'ta done that to him."  Nattie said as they walked to their classroom.  "You know what Mommy and Daddy told us about fighting."

"Yeah, I know."  Joey answered.  "We ain't supposed to throw the first punch.  I wasn't gonna hit him first.  I was gonna wait until he hit me, and then take it from there."

**********

Donny picked up all of the crayons and put them in the box.  Ms. Phillips had appointed him crayon monitor because he had stayed inside the lines.  

" ... But I been doing that since I was just a little kid."  Donny explained.

The rest of the children had been taken to the play yard for recess.  Donny would join them when he was finished putting the coloring supplies away. 

Ms. Phillips came into the room.  "Are you finished with your chores?"  She asked.

"Uh huh."  Donny said.  "But I got a question."

"What's that?"

"What's a bow dice?"

"A What?"  Ms. Phillips said.  She did not recognize the term, but she figured if Donny could tell her where and under what circumstances he heard it, she might be able to figure out what he was talking about. "Where did you hear that word?" 

"I read it in here."  Donny said, picking up a paperback novel from her desk.  The title was 'Under The Jolly Roger'.  "My Mommy did the artwork for it and I wanted to see what all about."  He thumbed through until he found the proper page.  " 'Oh Dun-can!' Melanie mo-aned wif' dee-sirey as he trail-led hot kisses down her cheek."  He read.  " 'Oh. Yes. Yes.'  She cried as she dug her fists into his ray-ven curls. He ground his lips to hers in pass-hon, his fin-gers quickly un-died the lack-ings on her bow-dice."

Blushing noticeably, Ms. Phillips took the book from Donny's hands.  "A bodice is a blouse."

"Oh."  Donny said.  "Are they going to have funs?"

Ms. Phillips blushed even deeper, if that were possible. 

" ... And just what was the book doing in plain sight on your desk in the first place?"  Mr. Hernandez, the principal, said from the doorway.

"I was going to read it during lunch."  Ms. Phillips said, blushing even more.  "I didn't think I had to put it away, since most three and four year olds can't recognize anything more complex than single syllable words."

"I understand what you're saying.  Under most circumstances, you would be right.  Since this is your first teaching assignment here, you didn't have the opportunity to know Donald's older brother and sister.  They are in the genius category.  From what I just heard, it is probable that Donald, here ..."

"Donny!"  The three-year-old corrected.

"Donny ... is in the same range, maybe even smarter.  I'm going to have a conference with his parents at the first opportunity.  In the meantime, I suggest you keep this ... "  He pointed to the paperback.   " ... Securely in your drawer."

**********

"It's for you."  Rachel Ableman called to Toni. 

Rachel had moved to California after graduation and had become Toni's chief cook, bottle washer, and special assistant.  Rachel was everything Toni was not.  She could smooth even the most ruffled customers with ease.  She was super-organized and extremely efficient.  Toni suspected that she secretly was the brains behind Artistic Imaginations and only let Toni think she was running the show.  Toni did not dispute the point.

"It's the school."  Rachel said.  "I hope nothing's wrong with the twins."

"Me, too."  Toni said as she picked up the receiver.

" ... No, the twins are all right."  Mrs. Clarke, the assistant principal told Toni.  "I'll discuss it with you when you get here."

**********

Nattie sat in a chair against the wall in Mrs. Clarke's office.  Joey stood beside her.  Butch Palermo sat at the desk.  He held an icepack to his face.  His lower lip was split and the left side of his jaw was turning an ugly shade of purple.  Behind him was a woman that Toni assumed was his mother.  She was stroking his back and kissing his head.

"What happened?"  Toni asked.

"Nammy himped be."  Butch said.

"Your two hoodlums attacked my little Dewey, here without cause."  The mother said.  "I want them expelled immediately and you ... "  She pointed to Toni.  " ... Will pay for all the medical bills.  If he needs orthodontia because of this ... "  Her voice trailed off.

"Mrs. Palermo, I am ... "

"MY name is MS. Donaldson."  She said indignantly.  "Dewey's ... father ... is Doug Palermo.  Perhaps you've heard of him.  He's the lead drummer with the Dregs Of Humanity.  When he hears about this, there'll be hell to pay."

Toni winced.  She now knew where Butch got his temperament.  Dregs Of Humanity was probably the raunchiest of the heavy metal bands.  All of their music carried warning labels for violence and obscenities.  Doug Palermo was in almost every issue of the tabloids for one reason or another, none of which were for acceptable behavior.

"So, what exactly did happen?"  Toni asked again.  She looked directly at Joey.

"I didn't punch him out.  Nattie did."  He said with a large measure of pride.

"Nattie ...?"

**********

"Hey, widdle Nitey Nite."  Butch called to Nattie as she and Joey started down the street to home. As usual, Jeremy Packard was right behind him. "Here's my homework."  He handed a stack of books to Nattie.

"So?"

"So.  Do it for me."

"Yeah.  Do it."  Jeremy repeated.

"I'll help you, but I won't do it for you.  That would be cheating."  She said, handing the books back.

"Look, you're the smartest kid in school.  I need to get good grades this period in order to stay on the football team.  I ain't got the time to study.  So ... you get do my homework for me.  And I better get an A ... Or else."   He held the books to her once more.

"I said no.  I meant no."  She let them drop to the ground.

"You shouldn'ta done that."  Jeremy cautioned.

Butch grabbed her by the hair and pulled her head back.  "Don't make me hurt you, Twinkie."  He threatened.

Nattie looked to her brother.  "Would that be considered as throwing the first punch?"

Joey nodded enthusiastically.  "Definitely."

**********

" ... And that's when I cleaned his clock."  Nattie concluded, a wide grin plastered across her face.

"Natalie Janette Knight!"  Toni said forcibly.  "We will discuss this when we get home!  You, too, Joseph.  Why didn't you do something?"

"I didn't have to.  Nattie was doing all right all by herself."  Joey replied in defense.

"You will be hearing from my lawyers!"  Ms. Donaldson declared.  "And I still want her punished.  She's got to learn that she can't get her way with her fists.  She should be proud that Dewey wanted her to help him."

"He didn't want me to help him with his homework.  I'd have been glad to do that.  He wanted me to do it for him.  There's a big difference."  Nattie protested.  "And besides, he threw the first punch."

"I don't think you will get too far with a lawsuit."  Mrs. Clarke spoke up.  "There are many witnesses that have corroborated Natalie's story.  Including several of the teachers.  Butch ... Dewey... is the one who uses force to get his way.  He has been harassing and threatening almost everyone younger or smaller than him.  If anything, he is the one who should be disciplined, not Nattie."

"I know Dewey can be a  ... little ... assertive at times, but you must understand that, as the child of a celebrity, he has had to be secluded for security purposes.  He has not had the opportunity to interact with other children.  The only reason I enrolled him in public school was to give him that opportunity.  Come, Dewey."  Ms. Donaldson grabbed her son by the arm and led him to the door.  "I think your psychotherapist was right.   Maybe you would do much better in a private school."

< Yeah.  Reform School.>  Toni thought.

"Even though Natalie was defending herself, I have to follow school policy."  Mrs. Clarke said.  "Therefore she will be placed on probation for three months.  That means no more fighting or any other violation of school rules for the rest of the quarter, or you will be suspended.  Do you understand, Natalie?"  Nattie nodded solemnly.  "You will also spend three days in detention.  As for Butch ... Dewey ... I am going to recommend that he be placed on indefinite suspension until he receives counseling for his behavior."

**********

 Toni sat in Mr. Hernandez's office.  When she got back from the twins' school, there was a message for her to come to the Pre School.  The principal wanted to talk to her about Donny.

< Oh no, not two in one day, and not on the first day of his school. >  She worried as she drove to the school.

"Mrs. Knight, I'm Leon Hernandez."  He said extending his hand to her.  He was a huge man, well over six feet and approximately 275-300 muscular pounds.  He had a ruddy complexion and a mass of ebony black hair.  He looked like he should be playing fullback for some pro football team instead of teaching preschoolers.  "I want to talk to you about Donny.  As you probably know, he is extremely bright.  I remember your other two children.  I was their teacher while they were here.  I only became Principal this year.  I think Donny may even exceed them in IQ.  With your permission, I have taken the liberty of arranging for him to undergo a battery of tests to determine just how intelligent he really is."

Toni nodded.  "Yes, we know he's bright, but we still want him to have as normal a childhood as possible, that's why we enrolled him in Pre School.  I must admit, though, I would like to know exactly how smart he is, too."

"Good."  He took a notepaper from his desk and wrote on it.  "Here is the name and address of the testing facility.  If it's all right with you, I've made the appointment for next Saturday.  That way it shouldn't inconvenience you too much."

**********

Nick measured the living room for the fiftieth time.  Toni said she was taking Donny to be tested at noon, and it was now four o'clock.  < How long does it take to test a three year old, anyway? >  He worried.

"Daddy."  Nattie said.  "You're always telling us to sit down and relax."

Yeah."  Joey piped in.  "Why don't you take your own advice?"

"I'm just nervous about Donny."  He told the twins.  "Mommy should have been back a long time ago, and I'm worried."

"We are, too.  Is it okay if we pace too?"  Joey said, falling in step behind his father.  Nattie was behind him.

"I have a better idea."  Nick said.  "Why don't we work off some of this nervous energy?  I've been promising to take you to the precinct gym to teach you some judo so you won't have to use your fists.  Why not now?"

"Aw-right!"  The twins said in unison.

"But how can you go out in the daylight?"  Nattie asked.

"I can always use Nick2.  He's hanging in the garage."

"What are we waiting for?"  Joey called as he headed for the garage.

"Jenkins."  Nick said.

"Yes, Nick."  The automated Smart House answered.

"Transfer all calls to my cell phone.  The twins and I are going for a ride."

"Yes, Nick."  Jenkins replied.

**********

They walked into the gym at the precinct.  Several of the policemen were exercising.  In one corner was a man who looked to be no more than a teenager.  Nick led the twins to him.

"Kids, this is Officer Yoshiro Nakahara.  He is sort of our expert in the martial arts."

"I thought we were going to learn judo, not drawing."  Joey whispered in a loud voice.

Yoshiro smiled broadly.  "Martial arts is a broad term covering all forms of Oriental disciplines.  Karate, Kung Fu, Judo and Tai Kwan Do are all covered by it."  He explained. "And everybody calls me Yoshi."

"I'm Joey."  He extended his hand.  "And that's Nattie.  She's my sister."

"Yoshi.  Can I borrow you for a few falls, just to give the kids an idea of what we mean?"  Nick said.

"Sure."  Yoshi and Nick bowed and then Nick lunged for Yoshi.  In one movement, Yoshi grabbed Nick's arms, thrust his foot into Nick's stomach and fell backward.  Nick went sailing over the small Oriental and landed with a loud thud on the mat.

"That's neat, Yoshi!"  Joey exclaimed.  "Can you show us how to do that?"

"That's not how it was supposed to happen."  Nick said, brushing himself as he slowly got up from the mat.  "You were supposed to let me throw you."

"You didn't tell me that."  Yoshi said innocently as he grabbed the detective's hand and helped him up.  "Wanna try again?"

Nick shook his head. "Maybe you could give the kids lessons?"

"I'd love to, but not today.  I've got a hot date and Kimmi doesn't like to be kept waiting."

"What happened to the cheerleader.  What was her name?  Bunkie?"

"Bunny.  And I only dated her as part of my cover."  Noticing the puzzled looks on the twins, he explained.  "I'm an undercover cop.  Because of my looks, I can go into high schools and youth gangs looking for drug dealers and other criminals."  He looked at Nick.  "It's a two edged sword, though.  I still get carded when I go into a bar.  Most places won't even let me in.  Some have even had to call the Captain to verify my age for curfew purposes.  I know he's not a happy camper when he is wakened in the middle of the night like that.  Also, getting a date is almost impossible.  What woman wants to go out with her little brother?  Be glad you don't have that problem.  I look fifteen, but I'm actually thirty one.  It's really hell to look half as old as you really are."

< Try eight hundred years older. >  Nick thought.  Just then, his cell phone rang.  It was Toni.  They had finally finished testing Donny, and the examiner wanted to talk with both of them.  Since it was now after six, there would be no need for Nick2.

**********

Nick paced the waiting room.  Nattie and Joey were busy playing in the well furnished play pit tucked into one corner of the room. 

Toni motioned to one of the chairs.  "Nick."  She said.  "Sit down before you wear out the rug."

"We told him the same thing at home."  Nattie said.

"Yeah.  Daddy's being a Nervous Mervis."  Joey added.

"When you called me, you said they were finished testing Donny.  So, where are they?"

"Right here."  A voice said from behind him.

He had been so engrossed in his worrying, he had not heard the person approach.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.  You must be Mr. Knight.  I'm Elaine Fairchild, the director of the center.  Can we go into my office and discuss Donny?"

Ms. Fairchild sat at her desk and motioned for Nick and Toni to take the chairs opposite her.

"I had somewhat of a problem with Donny."

"Problem?"  Nick and Toni said in unison. 

"Nothing's wrong, is there?"  Toni asked. 

"He isn't in any trouble, is he?"  Nick finished.

"Not that kind of a problem.  Unfortunately, there's no test available to accurately measure three-year olds.  I gave him the test for entrance to first grade.  He aced it in less than ten minutes."

"You mean he's ready for first grade?"  Toni said.

"Let me finish.  To satisfy my own curiosity, I kept giving him harder and harder tests.  That's what took so long.  The last test I gave him was the sixth grade proficiency test.  I factored out the scores for learned subjects like history, science, and the like, although he did show a remarkable knowledge of these subjects for a toddler.  He ended up with a score of 78.  Although that's on the low end of the tally, it still would be high enough for him to start seventh grade."

"Middle school?"

Ms. Fairchild nodded.  "But, because of his tender age, I don't think he would do well there.  I read in his profile that his older sister and brother attend the Accelerated Learning Center at UCLA.  Perhaps that would be the answer.  He could attend Pre School in the morning and ALC in the afternoon."

**********

"But I don't wanna go to Nerd School!"  Donny protested as Toni walked him to the office of the Accelerated Learning Center.  Since Nattie and Joey were already attending, it was a simple matter to enroll Donny as well.

"I don't know why."  A voice from behind them said.  "Nerd school can be fun.  I ought to know.  I went to Nerd school, too.  I started when I was just a little bit older than you."

Toni and Donny turned to face a man who looked to be in his early twenties.  He was tall and on the thin side with an unruly mop of reddish brown hair framing a leonine face.  His emerald green eyes twinkled mischievously.  He was dressed in tan chinos and a University of Edinburgh sweatshirt, and was pushing a ten speed street bike.  "My name is Billy MacGregor."  He said, with just the barest hint of a Scottish burr.  "I teach psychology and advanced Boolean logic, with a generous amount of good old fashioned common sense thrown in."

"I'm Toni Knight and this is my son Donny.  He's going to be going here in the afternoons."

Billy squatted to Donny's level and extended his hand.  "Pleased to meet you, Donny Knight."  He said.

"I still don't wanna go to Nerd School."  Donny pouted.

"Oh, I'm sure once you get to know your way around, you'll change your mind.  I thought the same thing when I first started.  I went to a Nerd school in Scotland.  Did you know we have six year old here who loves stock car racing, and a thirteen year old who is designing a guidance system for NASA?"

"Stock cars?"  Donny squealed.  "My cousin races stock cars.  I think I'd like to meet him."

"Here she comes now.  Annie Powrast, meet Donny Knight."

"A GIRL!  I thought you said he likes stock cars."

"I do.  Do you want me to name the stats of the twenty five leaders in the NASCAR Division AA?" Annie said, her hands firmly planted on her hips.

"My cousin Jeb drives stock cars.  You prob'ly heard of him.  Jeb Puckett?"

"Second Place Puckett?   He's so slow, they time him with a calendar."

"You take that back!"  Donny shouted.  "My cousin Jeb could win if he wanted to.  He can't 'cause then he'd have to take his helmet off."

"What's that got to do with anything?"  One of the other students asked.

"He can't be in the sun.  He'd burn up. He's a ... a  ... a ..."  Donny looked at his mother for guidance.

"What Donny means is that Jeb has Porphyrism.  He's very allergic to sunlight.  It could be fatal."  Toni explained

"And that's why he doesn't win races?"   One of the older students asked.  By now, a small crowd had gathered.

"Uh-huh."  Donny affirmed.

"Why doesn't he just take the prize with his helmet on?"

"I have an idea."  Billy said.  "Why don't we put this to the Brain Trust?  Maybe we can work out a solution so that Jeb Puckett can win races without french-frying himself."

"Neat idea, Billy."  A student said.  Talking among themselves, they dispersed.

"Brain Trust?"  Toni asked.

"One of my classes.  Boolean Logic."  Billy explained.  "Another name would be Brainstorming.  Sky Bluing.  Off The Wall Reckoning.  I try to get them to think outside the lines.  We've come up with a number of very unique solutions for supposedly impossible problems."

"That in itself is a unique solution.  I've got to go, now.  It's been nice meeting you, Mr. MacGregor."  Toni said as she took Donny's hand and started toward the classrooms.

"Mister MacGregor?"  Billy said.  "Mister MacGregor is me Da.  Even though I have two PhD's, I'm still only twenty years old.  That's too young to be a mister, or even a professor.  I can't even get drunk legally.  Not that I would, mind ya.  So, everyone just calls me Billy.  You might as well too."

"Okay, Billy.  See you and Donny after school."

**********

"Okay Geniuses.  Put your thinking caps on."  Billy MacGregor said to the ten students sitting in a simi-circle on the floor in front of him.  Each of them took out an imaginary hat and put it on their heads.  Even though there were desks, Billy found that this informal arrangement was much easier to work with.  The students ranged from Donny, who was three, to seventeen years of age.  "We have a problem.  This is Donny Knight.  He's one of our new students this year. Some of you know about his cousin Jeb."   He explained the problem.  "We have to find a way to let him win races.  Any ideas?"

"Why can't he accept the prize with his helmet on?"  Dave Gilligan asked.  Dave was thirteen and had an undergraduate degree in Electronics.  He was working on dual masters degrees in physics and math.  He was already on the NASA payroll.

" 'Cause the rules say so."  Donny answered.

"He's right."  Annie said.  "According to the NASCAR regulations, every winning driver must bare his head to verify that he is the actual driver of the car and not some ringer."

"Couldn't he use some other means of identification?  Like fingerprints or x-rays?"  Jesus Dominguez asked. Although he had just come from his native Mexico earlier that year, his command of English was almost complete, and there was very little trace of an accent.  Jesus was ten and had a phenomenal talent in art.  Several of his paintings and sculptures were already exhibited in galleries around the area. 

"Possible.  Good thought, Jesus."  Billy said.  "What about that, Annie?  You're our expert on racing."

"It would require a waiver from the racing commission, but it could be done."

"How about a animatronic image?  You know, like they use at Disneyland."  Andrea Blunderson suggested.  Andrea was an eleven year old high school senior.  Her specialty was ancient and medieval languages 

 "It's a good idea, but it wouldn't be practical."  Achmed El Fasaad chimed in.  Achmed was seventeen, the 'elder statesman' of the group.  He was from Kuwait and was majoring in Animal Husbandry.  He would be entering Veterinary Med School in the fall.  He hoped to return to Kuwait and help the impoverished nomadic war victims.  "It would require a controlled environment and special equipment.  Not to mention a trained crew and a long setup time."

"Okay then, what about a mask?"  Andrea replied.

"You mean like Zorro?"  Dave asked, making the sign of a 'Z' with his finger.

"No, silly.  A full face mask like they do in the movies."

"You want my cousin Jeb to race cars as Godzilla?"  Joey piped up.

"I mean a mask of his own face."

"You know, I think that just might work."  Anne said.

"And I know just the person to do it."  Nattie chimed in.  "One of Mommy's friends is Larry Groce.  He works for Industrial Light and Magic, and he does all sorts of neat things like that.  I bet he could make a mask for Jeb."

"What do you other geniuses think?"  Billy asked.

After a little discussion, everyone agreed that it might be worth a try.

"Good."  Billy said.  "Joey, Nattie, do you happen to know Mr. Groce's phone number?"

"No, but Mommy does."  Joey said.

"And we know hers."  Nattie finished her brother's sentence.

"It's 555 - 3214."  Joey said.

"And Jeb's is 555 - 8172."  Nattie added.  "Maybe you should check with him, too."

"That's a good idea."  Billy said as he left the room.  A few minutes later, he returned.  "I've talked with both Mr. Groce and Mr. Puckett.  They both agreed to the experiment.  They are going to meet at the ILM studio next Thursday evening to work out the details."

"Can we go too?"  Dave asked.  "After all, it was our idea."

"Why not?  I'll ask Mr. Groce.  Of course we will need permission slips from your parents.  If things work out, we can even consider this as a research expedition."

**********

"So, Jeb, that is what the students propose to do."  Billy MacGregor was saying.  He and the Brain Trust had assembled at the ILM studios.  "Larry, here will make a mold of your face and then he will construct a latex mask from that.  When you wear it you should be able to bare your head without any ill effects."

"Won't it get awful hot?"  Jeb asked skeptically.

"No."  Larry explained.  "The latex has a micropore texture that will let air in and sweat out, but the pores are way too small and randomly placed so no light can enter.  This also makes it extremely thin and light.  You won't even know you're wearing it.  We use it all the time on the special effects prostheses we build for the movie industry."

"When you make the mold, does that mean I have to stick my head in a bowl of plaster like we used to do in high school?  That stuff was powerful yucky."  Jeb made a face.

Larry shook his head.  "Now we use lasers and a computer."

"Don't that hurt?  I had a friend who had some warts removed with lasers.  He said it was real painful."

"Not that kind of laser.  More like the kind they use for the light shows.   Here, let me show you.  Who wants to be a volunteer?"

Several hands went up.

"Why don't we use Billy?"  Larry suggested.  There was a round of enthusiastic agreement.

Billy sat in the chair and Larry keyed in a series of commands.  The laser swept a pencil thin beam of light across Billy's face.  Slowly the machine rotated completely around his head, sweeping every inch of it.

"It didn't hurt a bit."  Billy testified.  "In fact, it kind of tingled."

"Now, watch the screen."   Larry keyed in a few commands and a wire frame of Billy's head appeared.  A few more, and it moved in all directions.

"Well, if y'all say so ... "  Jeb climbed into the chair and allowed Larry to repeat the procedure on him.

"We'll use this to have the computer carve a styrofoam base."  Larry explained.  "We'll then spray thin layers of the latex on that, and then we'll paint it to Jeb's exact coloring.  After that, we add poly hair, again matching Jeb's exactly, and viola, he can go out in the sunshine."

"COOL!"  Dave Gilligan said.  "Can we watch?"

"I'm afraid it will take several days to do it right.  But I'll call you when we're finished and you can come and see the final results."

"All right!"

**********

Joey and Nattie turned into the schoolyard.  They had really enjoyed the trip to ILM on Thursday evening and were looking forward relating the experience for the entire third grade.  Suddenly, a hand snaked around Nattie's neck and she was slammed against the schoolyard fence.

"Okay, Twinkie, this time you're gonna get it!"  Butch Palermo sneered into her face.  "Because of you, I got kicked out of school and my mom put me back in therapy.  I'm gonna whup your butt good and you can't do nothing about it 'cause you're on probation."

"Yeah.  Whup butt."  Jeremy, the ever present second shadow said.

"I'M not on probation ... "  Joey started toward the bully, his fists doubled. 

A sharp mental command from Nattie stopped him. < I can handle this. >  She sent.

Butch looked at Joey.  "And then I might just whup your wussy little brother, too."

"Him, too."  The echo repeated.

"If you really want to fight me, why don't we do it the right way?"  Nattie said.  "In the Van Gelder Complex gym.  Next Saturday.  Six in the evening.  We'll have the whole school there to watch."

Butch hesitated.  "All right Twinkie.  You're on.  Next Saturday it is.  Be there."  He pulled her hair for emphasis.

"Why'd you do that?"  Jeremy asked as they watched the twins walk away.

"Why not?   Let the whole school see that I'm not afraid of no little girl.  Maybe then they'll respect me."

"Yeah respect."

**********

"You know what Daddy said about fighting."  Joey reminded her as they continued into the school.

"Who said I'm going to use my fists.  This will be a good time to try out those holds that Yoshi has been teaching us.  I'm just going to mop the floor with him, I'm not going to beat him to a pulp."

"And just how are you going to get the Complex gym?"

"I'll ask Uncle Mike.  He and Aunt Tracy are the managers this month."

"You don't think he'll tell Daddy, do you?"

**********

"I see the kids are really into the karate stuff."  Mike Taylor said as he tossed another completed report into the out basket.

"Yeah."  Nick replied.  "They really enjoy it and Yoshi says they're ready to be rated.  According to him, most kids don't rate until they're at least nine or ten.  I guess it must be their mixed genes showing.  But how did you know?"

"Because they stopped at the complex yesterday and asked if they could use the gym next Saturday for a practice session.  They asked if it would be all right if they brought a few friends with them.  So, who's gonna be with them?  You or Toni?"

"I guess it's going to be Toni.  This is the first I heard about it.  I'll talk to them and get back to you."

**********

"So. What's this I hear about the two of you going to the Complex gym next Saturday?"  Nick asked the twins.  He had gone to the house on his lunch break.

"Well ... "  Joey stammered.  "We just wanted to practice a little."

"Yeah.  Just practice."  Nattie confirmed.  Both of the twins' heartbeats were racing a mile a minute.

"Do the two of you want to tell me the whole story."  Nick took Joey's wrist and held it in the air.  "Or do I have to get it the hard way?"  He let his fangs drop slightly.

"Okay."  Nattie said sheepishly.  "You remember Butch Palermo?   Well, he was at the schoolyard the other day and he wanted to beat me up for getting him in trouble.  He said he'd get his revenge and get me in trouble too, since I'm on probation.  I told him that if he wanted to fight, why not make it a real contest.  We'd do it in front of everybody at the Complex gym next Saturday.  That way, there'd be no doubts.  He agreed."

"And why do you have to fight him in the first place?"

"Because I have to.  If I let him scare me off, everybody would think I'm a weenie."

"Yeah, Dad."  Joey added.  "You taught us not to throw the first punch, but you also said not to walk away from a fight."

Nick thought for a long moment.  "You're right.  This is something you have to do.  There will be some restrictions, though.  There will be adults present.  Yoshi, Mommy and me ... and Ms. Donaldson ... and Uncle Mike and Aunt Tracy, too.

"Agreed."  Joey said.  "But you have to stay out of sight and promise not to interfere."

"What?"

"Please, Daddy.  Just promise."  Nattie pleaded.  "It's kinda hard to explain."

"Adults wouldn't understand.  It's a kid thing."  Joey added.

Nick smiled.  "Okay.  We'll do as you ask."

"Thanks, Daddy."  Both twins hugged and kissed their father.

"Besides, the money is going for a good cause."  Nattie said.

"Money?"

"Well, Daddy, you don't think we'd let an opportunity like this go for free, do you? At a buck a head to watch, that'll be a good contribution for Make A Wish Foundation."  Joey explained.

"You're gonna charge admission?"

"Grandfather taught me that."  Nattie grinned.

Nick made a mental not to have a long talk with his father.

**********

Nick tiptoed into the boys bedroom.  His youngest son was still awake.

"Daddy."  Donny asked.  "Is Nattie gonna get beat up when she fights that bully?"

"I don't know.  Whatever happens, I just want it to be a fair fight."  Nick said as he tucked the covers around the three year old's neck.  "Now go to sleep.  You have school in the morning."

"Do I hafta go to regular school any more?"  Donny asked solemnly.  "Can't I just go to Nerd School?"

"Of course you have to go to regular school."

"But I already know every'fing what Ms. Phillips is teaching."

"There's always something new to learn.  I'm still learning things."

"Why can't I just go to school when she teaches something I don't know?"

"Because you never know when that will be, so you have to go every day.  Trust me, there'll be something Ms. Phillips will be teaching tomorrow that you need to know."

"I guess you're right.  I'm gonna go to sleep now, so's I'll be all ready to learn what I need to know tomorrow.  Good night, Daddy."

"Good night Son."  Nick planted a kiss on his son's forehead and turned out the lights.  He shook his head as he left the room.  When did his kids get to be so wise beyond their years?

**********

" ... And so you see, Yoshi."  Nick said to the oriental policeman.  "I'd really appreciate it if you were in the gym next Saturday.  Not that I'm expecting any trouble, but it would mean a lot to me ... and to the twins too."

"No problem, Nick.  It's always a pleasure to see one of my proteges work out.  And if what you tell me is true about this Butch Palermo, maybe he'll learn that you don't need fists and strength to be superior."

"Thanks."

**********

"It's not that I think Nattie will be in any danger.  She certainly knows how to handle herself."  Toni said to Billy MacGregor when she took them for their ALC classes.  "It's just that I'd feel a lot better if you were there."

"I wouldn't miss it.  It's always very satisfying to see that one of my students is using what I taught them in a very practical way.  And you've got to admit that taking on the school bully in front of the entire school ... and not using fists or strength to defeat him ... and charging admission for charity to boot ... is definitely thinking outside the lines.  I most certainly will be there."  The Scotsman smiled broadly.  "I might even have the Brain Trust there as well.  It would be another good research exercise."

**********

"And so you see, Mrs. Clarke."  Nattie was saying to the assistant principal.  "I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't breaking any of the school rules.  I don't want to disobey my probation."

"Nattie, I just don't know."  Mrs. Clarke sighed.  "Technically you're not, since it won't be on school property, and it will be on a weekend.   I don't approve of fighting, no matter where it takes place.  However, since you say that there will be adults there to make sure that everything is on the up and up, I don't see where you could get into any trouble with the school.  Also, I like the idea that you are going to raise money for charity.  How did you ever get Butch to agree to that?"

"I didn't.  He doesn't know that ... yet.  But I think that some of his so-called buddies, like Jeremy, will probably tell him before Saturday.

**********

"Okay, Twinkie, let's get this over with."  Butch groused as he entered the Complex gym.  "And since you're charging for everyone to see me beat the crap outa your twitty sister, I expect to get seventy five percent of the take."

Jeremy, as usual, was right behind him.  "Yeah seventy five."

"No way.  That money's for charity."  Joey said.

"We'll see about that after I take care of business.  Where's the ring?"

The gym was crowded with students and others who had paid a dollar to see the contest.  The adults, as agreed, were standing in a corner just outside the gym office. 

"Yeah. Where's the ring?"  Jeremy echoed.

There ain't no ring."  Joey said.  "There's only couple of mats."

"How can your wimpy sister fight me proper if there ain't no ring?"

"I don't need a ring, and I have no intention of fighting with you."  Nattie said as she entered the area.  She was dressed in her karate uniform.

"Why you wearing pajamas?   So's you'll be more comfortable when I put you to sleep?"  Butch sneered.

"Yeah.  Little girl in pajamas."  Jeremy parroted.

"They're not pajamas.  It's a karate uniform. And as I said before, I'm not going to fight you."

"Then get prepared to get whupped, 'cause I'm gonna fight you."  Butch doubled his fist and swung at Nattie.  She easily dodged his punch.  He swung again and this time she grabbed his wrist and pulled sharply downward.  Caught off balance, he landed on the mat with a thud.

"If you slap the mat with your hands just before you land, it makes it a lot easier."  Nattie coached.

"That fries it, Twinkie. Nobody tells me how to fight.  'Specially no GIRL!"  Butch growled as he lunged at her.  She sidestepped and pushed at the back of his neck as his arms closed around thin air.  This time he managed to roll onto his shoulder before he hit the mat. 

"Look, I'll make it easy on you."  He said as he got up.  "I'll give you a freebie."  He tapped his chin a few times.  "Right here, Wimpie.  Tag me here."

Nattie shook her head no.

"C'mon.  You were awful brave a few minutes ago."  He danced around her tapping his chin.  "You suddenly showing yourself for the coward you are?"  He taunted.

"Yeah.  Wimpie."

"I'm not going to fight you.  I don't have to.  There are other ways to show superiority than using your fists."

"Oh?  Like shoving me and running around in your PJs?"  He tapped her cheek mockingly.

"No.  Like staying cool in the face of a bully."

"She's learned her lessons well."  Yoshi said from the corner of the gym where he and the other adults stood.

"Yes, she has."  Mrs. Clarke replied.  "At first, I had reservations about this.  I didn't want the other kids to see a fist fight and especially to see me here.  It would be almost like I condoned it.  But seeing what Nattie is trying to do, I feel a lot better about it."

"I ain't no bully!  And you ain't more superior than me, 'cause you're a coward.  The only way to be better is to be stronger than everyone else."  Butch yelled as he swung at Nattie once more.  Nattie pulled his arm to the side and curled her foot around his ankle. This time Butch remembered to slap the mat before he landed.  

"Who told you that?"  Nattie asked as she offered her hand to help him up.

"My Daddy did."  He batted her arm away.  "He said that the only way you are going to get anybody to respect you is to be meaner and badder than they are."

"That isn't respect, that's fear." 

"Is not.  My Daddy should know.  He's Doug Palermo of the Dregs Of Humanity.  Everybody respects him."  He said, pushing her hard.

Nattie caught his hands just as he made contact.  At the same moment, she pushed her foot into his stomach and used her off balance position to fall backward.   Just as her father had done when Yoshi used the maneuver on him, Butch went sailing over her and landed on the mat with a sickening thud.  When he stood up, there was a trickle of blood from his left nostril.  He sniffed it away.  "Now you've really done it, weenie."  He growled.  "Nobody does that to Doug Palermo's son and gets away with it."

"Give it up, Butch.  You've been beaten fair and square."  Joey called.

"No way.  She can't beat me.  She ain't even hit me yet."  He swung wildly, his eyes glazed and his jaw set.  "She's gotta beat me to a pulp.  Them's the rules."

"Those are the rules YOU go by.  Not mine.  I told you at the start I wasn't going to fight you, and I meant it."  Nattie said, easily dodging his wild thrashings.

"Fight!"  He screamed.

"No."  She said softly.

"I said fight!"  He threw himself at her and she sidestepped easily.  He fell to the mat.  Without even thinking, he got up and lunged again with the same results.

"I said no."

"My baby!  What is happening here?"  Ms. Donaldson said as she hurried through the crowd to Nick's side.

Nick put his fingers to his lips.  "Whisper."  He cautioned.  "We're not really supposed to be here."

But I ..." 

Nick put his hand over her mouth.  "I said to whisper.  Will you do that?" 

Ms. Donaldson nodded.  "I got a call from Jeremy.  He said that Dewey and Nattie were fighting.  How could that happen?  He's supposed to be at his therapist."

Just then, their attention was drawn to the mat.  Butch was getting up, rather slowly this time, after making another hard landing on the mat.  Blood trickled from both nostrils.  He was swinging blindly now, with no pretense of finesse.  He brushed his hands against his jeans and the next moment, a large switchblade was in his hands.  It opened with a loud click.

The crowd recoiled at the sight of the weapon.  Nick and LaCroix started toward the combatants, but Yoshi held up his hand.  "Let them play this out.  Nattie knows how to defend herself against this type of attack.  We've gone over it many times in her lessons."

Nick nodded assent.  "Okay, but at the first sign of danger ... " 

LaCroix growled threateningly.  "I, too will abide."  He conceded.  "For now."

"I understand."  Yoshi said.

"Ms. Donaldson?"  Nick asked.  The boy's mother was staring numbly at the scene before her.  She nodded imperceptibly.

"Now you gotta let me win."  Butch yelled, brandishing the knife at Nattie.

"Even if I let you beat me, you still wouldn't win."  Nattie said sidestepping as he swung the knife in a large arc to her midsection.  Nick could tell she was petrified, but to her advantage, she did not panic.

He thrust the knife at her.   "I gotta win!"  Sweat was running down his face and his eyes were unseeing.

Nattie grabbed his arm as he thrust and bent his wrist sharply back.  Butch screamed in pain and dropped the knife.

In less than an instant, Nick and LaCroix were at the mat.  LaCroix grabbed Butch.  There were definite flecks of gold in his eyes.  He opened his mouth and the tips of his fangs were showing

"LACROIX!"  Nick whispered loudly.  "NO!"

He hissed and immediately the elder vampire's fangs retracted and his eyes returned to their steel blue.  "That's my granddaughter!"  He hissed.

"Mommy! Mommy!"  Butch cried as he spotted his mother.  "Stop them.  They're hurting me."

Nick saw the streaks of red on Nattie's shirt and then the steady stream flowing from her clenched left fist.  He buried his face in her hair, not only to comfort her, but to hide the yellow tint in his irises.  Within seconds, he was back to normal.

Toni, meantime had taken one of the towels from the exercise rack and wrapped it around her daughter's hand.

"Quick."  She said.  "Let's get them into the office."

The parents and LaCroix shepherded the combatants into the gym office while the other adults took charge of clearing the gym in an orderly manner.

"It ain't as bad as it looks."  Nattie said bravely.  She opened her hand and there was only a thin red line oozing droplets of blood where earlier there had been a steady flow from a deep cut.  "It must have happened when I took the knife from him."

"Where did you get that knife."

"What knife?"  Butch sobbed, holding his right wrist.  It looked to be only badly bruised, not broken.  "I didn't have no knife.  She did.  I was trying to take it away from her.  She was going to cut me."

Ms. Donaldson held the switchblade in front of him.  "That's a lie.  I saw it all. You attacked her.  You cut her.  This is your father's knife.  Where did you get it?"

"I had to take it.  I had to win.  Don't you understand?  I had to win.  Daddy said so.  He says that winning is everything and you're less than nothing if you're a loser.  And I ain't no loser."  His body racked with sobs.  "I had to win."  He whimpered.

"I think I'm going to have a very long talk with your father.  In the meantime, I'm going to think seriously about enrolling you in another school."

"May I make a suggestion?"  LaCroix asked.  "Perhaps you should consider a military school.  The discipline would do him a world of good."

"Thank you.  I'll definitely look into that."  Ms. Donaldson said taking Butch roughly by the hand.

"If you decide to go that route, the Crestline Military Academy is an excellent one, and it's not too far from here."  LaCroix suggested.  "The Commandant, Colonel Thompson, is a former Marine.  We were together in Vietnam."

"But I don't want to go to a military school."  Butch protested.  "And when Daddy hears about this, he's gonna sue you for custody.  He'll win too, 'cause he's a big celebrity and you're a nobody."

"I don't care who he thinks he is.  My lawyers and his lawyers are going to have a very long discussion about who gets sole custody rights.  I imagine after this little episode, it wouldn't be hard to convince a judge that he's a corrupting influence on you."

"I didn't know you served in Vietnam."  Toni asked LaCroix as they left the gym.

"Who said I served there?  I merely followed Col. Thompson's unit.  The feeding opportunities were exquisite."

"Oh."

**********

Toni smothered a laugh as she walked into the office of the Accelerated Learning Center.  She had been called because of a problem involving Donny and two other students.  What she saw in the office was not a problem.  It was hilarious.  Billy MacGregor sat there covered in a neon green gelatinous substance.  Lily Powrast, Annie's mother, and Rafael Dominguez, Jesus's uncle sat across from him.

"I thought you were supposed to eat jello, not wear it."  She said, wiping a laugh tear from her eye.

"It's not jello, Toni.  It's slime."  Billy said, barely concealing his own laughter.  "And these are the ones responsible."  He pointed a greenish finger at Jesus Dominguez, Donny and Annie Powrast.

"It was a mistake."  Jesus said between giggles.  "Really it was."

"Yeah.  A mistake."  Donny affirmed.

"It wasn't supposed to be Billy."  Annie added.

**********

"You sure this is gonna work?"  Annie said as he climbed onto Jesus's shoulders.

Jesus grasped the back of the chair to steady himself.  "Yeah it'll work.  I saw it on Nickelodeon.  That's where I got the recipe, too.  It's nothing but cornstarch, cooking oil and green food color.  I had my sister Margarita make it up.  She's thirteen and she can use the stove."  He reached for the margarine tub that Donny held and handed it to Annie, who placed it across the top of the partially open classroom door.  "Now when he comes through, the tub will fall on him and splat!"  He slapped his hands together for emphasis.

"Here he comes now."  Annie said.  "Let's get into our positions so's he won't suspect a thing."  The three of them took their seats with the rest of the Brain Trust on the floor of the classroom.

"Good afternoon, Genius ... " The tub fell on Billy's head, spilling its contents over him and onto the floor.  " ... ses ... "  He sputtered as he took a step and slipped on the glossy mess.  With arms flailing and legs pumping, he made a not too graceful landing on his rump.  "Okay."  He said over the belly laughs of his students.  "Who is responsible for this ... "  He wiped the green goo from his face. 

Donny, Annie and Jesus were intently inspecting the ceiling tiles.

"We are so-o toast."  Annie whispered loudly.

"Somos muertos. (We're dead.)"  Jesus said, making a small sign of the cross on his chest.

"Dead meat on toast."  Donny added.

**********

"As we said, it was an accident."  Jesus restated.  "It was supposed to be for Tommy Kravitz, but Billy got there first."

"Yeah."  Annie continued.  "Tommy's so stuck up.  He thinks that just because he goes to the ALC, he's something special."

"We just wanted to bring him down a peg or two."  Jesus added.

"I must admit, I expected something different from my geniuses.  This ... prank is very juvenile."

"What's juve ... juven ... What's that?"  Donny asked.

Jesus whispered something into the three year old's ear.

"But we ARE kids.  "Annie retorted.

"And little kids too."  Donny placed his hands on his hips in a sign of toddler frustration.

"I still expected something more imaginative.  For your punishment, I want you to think up the perfect practical stunt.  And I want it before next week."

"Aw-right."  The three of them said in unison.

"That's not all.  Then I want you to tell it to the entire Brain Trust."

"Aw ...  "  The three groused.  "That's no fun."

"That way, if any of you decide to pull it off, everyone will know who's responsible ... and we'll know who to get back."

"That's not fair."  Jesus said dejectedly after Billy left the room.  "He wants us to think of the perfect practical joke and we'll never have the chance to pull it off."

"So what you do is think of two of them." Rafael said, his dark eyes glistening mischievously.  "You tell one to the class, and then pull the other one off."

Right on!"  Annie said, giving Jesus the high five.

"Just remember the three prime rules about practical jokes."  Toni said.  "Know who.  Know why.  No proof. "

"How'd you know that?"  Donny asked.

"Remind me when you're older to have Grandma and me tell you about a group called the AFO-OFA."

"You know something."  Donny said, locking arms with his two friends.  "I think I'm gonna like Nerd School."

**********

The End?

Not with these kids around!