I was a Teenage Werewolf. Well, there you have it. There's not much more to add to that. This bio-pic portrays Michael Landon's life as a teenage werewolf. He's a frustrated teen who doesn't fit in. A psychiatrist (the magnetic Whit Bissell) does some sort of past life regression on Landon's character and he becomes a werewolf whenever he hears a bell ringing... or sees milk... or hears milk ringing... (I'm not real clear on this - neither is the movie.) His girlfriend loves him for no apparent reason, and he has a pitiful dad who's doing his damnedest to try to keep things together. Landon's werewolfery spins out of control (because of Whit Bissell's unbridled ineptitude, I might point out) and all ends tragically. Although Landon dies in the end, so does Whit Bissell, so its a draw. Check out the entire Michael Landon bio-pic oeuvre, chronicling his entire life, which includes I Was A Late-Teens/Early Twenties Cowboy; I Was A Middle-Age Prairie Dad; I Was An Angel Of A Certain Age.Mystery Science Theater 3000 presents: #809:
I Was A Teenage Werewolf
One of the many "teen monster" films of the 1950s, "I Was a Teenage Werewolf" is best-known for starring a youthful Michael Landon. An angst-ridden, misunderstood teenager visits a psychiatrist, whose unusual treatment accidentally causes him to regress to his primal, animalistic nature. As a result, the hood is transformed into an angst-ridden, misunderstood fangy beast -- who must somehow find a way to recover to his normal state.
Prologue: Mike is relieved of command of the ship. Servo is offered the job and declines on the basis that he cannot determine the difference between Shinola and the other stuff, among other things.
Segment One: Pearl takes the Brain Guy and Bobo camping, leaving the SOL on their own, functioning only on ship's batteries. This leaves the SOL very vulnerable; in fact, within seconds a face hugging alien attaches itself to Servo's head.
Segment Two: Crow gets a proximity detector to try to ferret out the aliens that are invading the ship. It malfunctions, but it measures humidity perfectly.
Segment Three: Servo is armed to the gills to do battle with whatever alien life-force is attacking the ship. Turns out, he's a big, giant crybaby.
Segment Four: Mike, Tom and Crow set about eating all the eggs the foreign life force has left on the ship. Crow puts his own spin on things by trying to make the SOL a darling breakfast place.
Segment Five: Mike fends off the beast by mimicking Adam Duritz of Counting Crows. Naturally, the beast is repelled. Down on the unidentified planet where Pearl, Bobo and Brain Guy have made camp, Pearl tells ghost stories.
When visiting the Minneapolis/St. Paul Metro Area, I recommend a couple of marvelous breakfast spots... because breakfast is the most important meal of the day. And, if done correctly, it can be the most cholesterol-y and caloric meal of the day. There's the Day By Day Cafe in St. Paul, and in Minneapolis, there's the Egg & I, a veritable Minneapolis institution, and the Bryant Lake Bowl. Wonderful breakfast places all and really quite reasonable. Or feel free to stop by my place and I'll fix you up you a diet Coke and a cigarette.
This movie is actually not that bad. Its quite competently rendered, although it does have long spells of goofiness. Case in point: the scene of the singing troll with the upsetting pants. I didn't hate this movie which is quite something, indeed!
- Mary Jo Pehl
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The best book for looking up movie titles and descriptions is the Movie / Video Guide by Leonard Maltin. If for some reason a film like this isn't available on videotape, you can still get Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie while supplies last...
Or on to the next episode, #810
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