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Copyrighted 1921 By Mack Sennett, CIL 17222, Nov. 21, 1921

Special thanks to Robb Farr for making this text available.



The picture opens with a camera shot, showing A CONGESTED SECTION OF A LARGE CITY WHERE LIFE WAS ONE THING AFTER ANOTHER AND NOT MUCH OF ANYTHING. We next come to a closeup of MRS. TIMOTHY O'DAIR, WHO SPENT TWO-THIRDS OF HER LIFE OVER THE WASH TUB AND the BALANCE AT THE KITCHEN STOVE, after which we are introduced to TIMOTHY O'DAIR, WHO CONTENDED THAT ALL MARRIAGES WERE NOT MADE IN HEAVEN, AND BROUGHT HOME HIS IDEA OF A SON-IN-LAW TO PROVE IT. Timothy is just getting home from work; he has his helper with him, and as he enters the house, he calls to Mrs. O'Dair: "HERE'S DANNY WITH ME: WHERE'S MOLLY O?" "SHE STARTED FOR THE BARN TO TURN OUT THE GAS," replies Mrs. O'Dair, who is in the kitchen preparing a meal. Acting as if Molly might already be on her way back, Mrs. O'Dair looks out the kitchen window and cries in astonishment: "HEAVENS ABOVE! IT'S ON FIRE!" Tim O'Dair, Danny Smith and Mrs. O'Dair all rush out to the barn and a crowd of neighbors quickly gathers. Looking up at the second story of the barn, where she believes her Molly O' to be, Mrs. O'Dair screams: "SOMEBODY SAVE MY POOR CHILD!" A figure appears on a balcony of the barn and over its head is a blanket for protection from the smoke. A blanket is stretched below and the figure jumps, landing safely and removing the blanket from her head, a colored girl says: "THAT'S MY LAST TRIP FOR the LAUNDRY," and rushes away.

We next see Jimmy O'Dair, Molly's brother. He appears on the back porch of the O'Dair home and calls to his father: "HEY, POP: THE PHONE'S RINGING." It is Molly who is on the phone, calling from a telephone booth downtown. She opens her conversation with "HELLO, POP; THIS IS MOLLY." "I FORGOT TO TURN OFF THE GAS STOVE, AND IF YOU DON'T ATTEND TO IT, THE BARN MIGHT CATCH FIRE." "MIGHT CATCH FIRE! WE'RE LUCK IF WE SAVE THE HOUSE," answers her father. We then see Molly, who gets over that the language her father is using is too strong for her to listen to. She rushes out onto the street, bumps into a man on the street, saying to him as she backs away: "IF YOU WERE A FLYING MACHINE, I COULD USE YOU." While the neighbors are vainly endeavoring to put out the fire with garden hose and buckets of water, Jimmy O'Dair rushes to a fire alarm box and turns in an alarm. Meanwhile Molly has mounted her bicycle, with a basket of clothes on the handle bars, and is having a wild ride home. At intersecting streets, she dashes in front of a fire engine on its way to the fire, and leads it for blocks. Approaching a railroad crossing, Molly sees the gates go down, but dashes madly through in front of the locomotive. Arriving home, Molly dashes up to her father with "OH POP! YOUR GOLD-PLATED WATCH -- I LEFT IT IN the BARN." Molly dashes into the burning barn and comes out on the balcony, watch in hand. She drops it to her father, he misses it and it hits the ground, breaking into a thousand pieces. Molly is TRAPPED by the flames on the balcony and her father goes in after her. She is saved by jumping to a blanket, only to see her father come out on the balcony in the same predicament she occupied but a few seconds before. The blanket is stretched again for him and he jumps, but goes through a hole in the blanket to the ground. Getting up, Tim O'Dair turns to the crowd, with the remark: "IT'S A WONDER YOU DIDN'T USE MOSQUITO NETTING."

WHEN THE O'DAIR HOUSEHOLD RESUMED ITS ACCUSTOMED COURSE is the title which opens the next scene in the dining room of the O'Dair home. Mrs. O'Dair is spreading a checkered cloth on the table, and the picture cuts to a semi-closeup of Tim O'Dair's helper, preceded by a descriptive title: DANNY SMITH DIDN'T UNDERSTAND HOW ANY GIRL COULD REFUSE HIM. Danny seems very well satisfied with himself. He follows Molly O' out onto the porch. She sits down on the step and he follows suit with the question: "DID YOUR FATHER TELL YOU I JUST GOT A RAISE?" "MAYBE HE DID -- BUT I WASN'T LISTENING," answers Molly, who is looking over the pages of a newspaper in her lap. Pointing to a certain page, Molly says to Danny: "I ADMIRE A MAN LIKE THAT WHO DOES THINGS AND DOESN'T BRAG ABOUT IT." Danny looks and we see a newspaper insert, showing a picture of Dr. John C. Bryant. The headlines accompanying the photo explain that Dr. Bryant is a wealthy bachelor and prominent philanthropist and that there is some speculation as to the girl he will choose. beside his picture is a blank space of equal size in which appear the words NAME PLEASE? and underneath the word WHO? Danny looks at Molly with the remark: "A GUY LIKE THAT'S ALRIGHT IF YOU'RE SICK, BUT WHERE WOULD HE BE IF THE SINK STOPPED UP?"

The next sequence opens with A STRANGE PRODUCT OF THE STREETS WHO SHAPED SILHOUETTES WITH HIS SHEARS AND TAUGHT HAPPINESS WITH HIS HOMELY PHILOSOPHY. He is the philosopher, Molly's confident, a good old soul to whom Molly always goes with her troubles for advice and guidance. Molly is sitting beside him. She turns and speaks: "THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING IN WHAT YOU SAY THAT MAKES ME BELIEVE DREAMS SOMETIMES COME TRUE." "IT IS THE BUSINESS OF LIFE TO CHERISH MEMORIES AND REALIZE DREAMS," he answers. Molly looks down at the newspaper containing the picture of Dr. John Curtis Bryant, which she still carries, and then showing the picture to the philosopher, she questions: "IS IT WRONG FOR ME TO LIFT MY EYES TO THE STATION OF A MAN LIKE THAT?" He replies: "IF IT IS WRONG TO HOPE FOR BETTER THINGS, THEN AMBITION IS AN EVIL." Taking a little book of prose from a table at which they are sitting, he finds a certain page and points a bit of verse. An insert flashes on the screen, which reads: WHEN WE STRIVE TO LIFT OURSELVES OUT OF the COMMONPLACE WE ARE ON the ROAD TO BETTER THINGS. After reading it, Molly thinks and then questions: "DOES THAT MEAN THAT AN EX-BARTENDER COULD BECOME A BISHOP IF HE WANTED TO?" "IT'S POSSIBLE -- BUT IT HASN'T BEEN DONE," replies the philosopher. A sudden thought darts across Molly's mind and she exclaims: "GEE WHIZ! I FORGOT POP'S DINNER." Reaching down beside her for the dinner pail, she is about to start on her way as the scene fades out and into title: IN ANOTHER SECTION OF THE CITY. The setting is a beautiful conservatory. Miriam Manchester and her fiancÚ, Dr. John Curtis Bryant, are seated together at a table. Miriam is addressing announcements of their engagement and as the Doctor reads one, we see it in an insert. Dr. Bryant exits and Miriam's brother enters, preceded by an introductory title: FRED MANCHESTER WAS the AUTHOR OF THE SCHEME THAT HAD LAUNCHED HIS SISTER ON HER LATEST MATRIMONIAL VENTURE. Looking over her shoulder, he says: "SEND ONE TO THE JEWELER AND DO A LITTLE SHOPPING WHILE OUR CREDIT IS GOOD."

The picture cuts to Molly on the way to her father with his dinner pail. Perhaps she is superstitious, for we see her stop to pick up a pin and then continue on her way. Two girls approach from around a corner and as Molly endeavors to look them over without interrupting her journey, she steps back into the open door of a limousine standing at the curb. Determined not to be embarrassed, Molly steps into the car and sits down, as though she owned it. The girls pass on with an astonished look, Molly starts pretending to read the paper she has been carrying, and glances slyly over the top of it at the girls, to see if she has made the proper impression. Meanwhile, Dr. Bryant, whose limousine has figured in the incident, has seen part of it from a safe distance away. Molly steps out of the car, after the girls are safely out of sight, and says to the chauffeur: "JAMES, I NEED EXERCISE; YOU MAY GO." To Molly's astonishment, the Doctor gets in the car and drives away, looking back at her with a smile, as she hides behind the corner of a building. Fade out.

Fade in on a sumptuous breakfast in the Manchester home. In the background is a beautiful pool and some guests are enjoying a morning dip. We come to a semi-closeup of Miriam and Dr. Bryant. Miriam is attired in a revealingly beautiful bathing costume. She listens as the Doctor speaks: "I HOPE YOU WILL NOT MISUNDERSTAND ME WHEN I SAY THAT I CONSIDER MY FUTURE WIFE ABOVE THIS FRIVOLOUS PASTIME."

Back at the O'Dair home, Mrs. O'Dair stands in the hall and calls Molly, who comes right downstairs to hear her mother tell her: "IF THERE IS ONE THING YOUR FATHER IS REGULAR IN IT'S IN HIS MEALS." In the kitchen, where Mrs. O'Dair is preparing her husband's dinner, she says to Molly; "MRS. SMITH OWES ME A SCUTTLE OF COAL; TELL HER I'LL CALL IT SQUARE FOR A CUP OF SUGAR." We see Molly on her way after the sugar and her arrival at Mrs. Smith's. Mrs. Smith is fixing a flower pot with earth, preparing for her plant. Molly doesn't fail to notice this and when the woman goes in to get her the sugar, Molly digs a little of the earth up in the pot, picks a plant close by and sticks it in the freshly dug earth. Mrs. Smith comes out, hands Molly the cup of sugar, and then turns to her flower pot, astonished to see a plant has already sprung up. Molly gets home with the sugar, puts three heaping spoons full into the cup on top of her father's dinner pail, and blows off the top of the pail the sugar that has missed the tin cup. As she picks up the dinner pail, her mother hands her a bundle, saying: "DELIVER THIS BUNDLE OF CLOTHES ON YOUR WAY BACK."

The picture cuts to a riding party, given in honor of Dr. Bryant. As the party is about to leave for the ride, Dr. Bryant is summoned to the telephone. Coming back, he meets Miriam in the doorway, attired in riding habit, and says to her: "I'M AFRAID YOU WILL HAVE TO TAKE THE RIDE WITHOUT ME, MIRIAM; I'M CALLED TO ATTEND A SICK BABY." She replies: "WHY THIS PARTY WAS GIVEN IN YOUR HONOR; LET SOMEBODY ELSE ATTEND THE BABY," to which he answers: "A DOCTOR HAS NO CHOICE, MY DEAR." Cut to (sic)

Molly walking along street with dinner pail on the way to her father with his lunch. As she is passing along, a neighbor stops her and she learns that "MRS. MALJAN'S BABY IS VERY SICK." Without much hesitation Molly goes into Mrs. Maljan's house to investigate or perhaps see if she can be of any assistance. In her excitement, she grabs what she thinks is a pan and goes to the sink to fill it with water. It proves to be a sive (sic) and the water goes right on through. Dr. Bryant arrives and Molly recognizes him, as the doctor whose picture she has seen in the paper. Demurely she remarks: "I'M GLAD THEY GOT A GOOD DOCTOR." He enters the room where the baby is crying and the mother is frantic in her efforts to quiet it. Apparently it is a SERIOUS CASE. Dr. Bryant makes an examination and pulls from the baby's garment a long, straight pin. He holds it up for the mother to see, hands it to her and says:" MADAM, IN FUTURE USE SAFETY PINS." The baby stops crying immediately, its mother overjoyed, kisses it and then the Doctor. He and Molly exit and as she is going his way, he gives her a lift. To her, IT SEEMED JUST LIKE HEAVEN, riding in a big roadster beside a prominent doctor. A cut to Tim O'Dair on his job at ditch digging, shows that AS USUAL, FATHER SPENT THE FIRST HALF OF HIS LUNCH HOUR WONDERING WHAT DETAINED HIS DAUGHTER. A whistle blows and Tim is compelled to resume work without his dinner. AT THE CROSS-ROADS Molly and Dr. Bryant meet the riding party. Miriam takes in the situation and then sarcastically remarks to the doctor: "THE BABY APPEARS MUCH BETTER -- THANKS TO YOUR DEVOTION TO DUTY." "I'M SORRY YOU SAID THAT, MIRIAM; I'M JUST GIVING THE YOUNG LADY A LIFT" is Dr. Bryant's only reply. Fred Manchester, also one of the riding party, jollies the Doctor with "I SEE YOU PRESCRIBED MOTORING FOR THE SICK BABY" and at Miriam's command, the riding party start on. Molly and the Doctor arrive at the scene of her father's work and Tim O'Dair and his helper Danny Smith are thunder struck to see her bid the Doctor good-bye and alight from his roadster, dinner pail in on hand and bundle of laundry in the other. As she approaches Tim O'Dair he reprimands her with: "SO THAT'S HOW YOU SPEND YOUR TIME," and Molly in her embarrassment steps back into a ditch and the next minute crawls out, hat over one eye. The picture cuts to the home of Miriam Manchester; the riding party has returned and we see them DISCUSSING THE ADVANTAGE OF BEING A DOCTOR. Molly arrives at the back door, laundry in one arm and an umbrella in the other. As she waits to be let in, she looks up at the sky to see if it is going to rain. Inside Molly is sorting the laundry she has just delivered when a puppy grabs a piece that has fallen to the floor and runs away with it, carrying it into the room where the riding party is assembled. Molly follows, much to her embarrassment, and then goes back to her task, followed by Albert Faulkner, one of the party, who is easily attracted by a pretty face. Standing beside Molly as she looks over the linen, he opens with "HELLO BABY." Molly looks at him from head to foot, takes in his age and grey hair, and replies: "HELLO GRANDPA." As he stands at the table his glance falls on the newspaper in which Molly delivered his laundry. It is the same paper that carried the picture of Dr. Bryant and in the space beside the picture with the word Who? underneath, Molly has pasted a very old fashioned picture of her own, which earlier she has cut from a photograph out of the family album. Faulkner seizes the paper and carries in to the other members of the party, with the words: "HERE'S THE BEST YET," explaining to them: "SHE'S THE WASHWOMAN'S DAUGHTER THAT WE MET IN THE PARK WITH DOC." While Molly is waiting for the housekeeper, she sees the butler come into the kitchen and fill a plate with some small cakes from a box nearby. They look very tempting to Molly and after he has left she goes over and sample one. It is half way in her mouth when the housekeeper enters and Molly hurriedly pushes it the rest of the way in and when the housekeeper asks her for the laundry, Molly's mouth is so full she can't speak, so she holds her jaws still and pantomimes that it is on the table. The housekeeper picks up the bill, pays Molly and exits. Again Molly's mind reverts to the cakes and she helps herself to a few more; then she fills both pockets, and then a happy thought strikes her as she looks down at her folded umbrella. She has just finished dumping into it a generous supply of cakes, when Fred Manchester reaches around the doorway she is standing near and touches her on the shoulder. Entering, he tells Molly that Miriam Manchester, the mistress of the house, wants to see her. He endeavors to take Molly's umbrella, but she steadfastly refuses. Carrying it through the hall and putting it in the umbrella rack, Molly continues on her way with Manchester.

As she enters, Molly passes a woman attired in riding breeches and smoking a cigarette. Molly studies her for a moment and then says:" EXCUSE ME, LADY; I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MAN." When Molly meets Miriam, there is a brief pause and then Miriam questions her with: "WHAT ARE WE COMING TO WHEN A WASHERWOMAN'S DAUGHTER PRESUMES TO IMPOSE HERSELF ON HER BETTERS?" To this Molly replies: "IF YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT THE RIDE THIS MORNING, -- THE DOCTOR INVITED ME." We next see Dr. Bryant arrive. It is now raining outside and he dashes in, hands his umbrella to the butler and brushes the water off his coat and hat. The butler announces that "DR. BRYANT HAS ARRIVED." Cut to Molly in hallway. Fred Manchester has followed her and they are just outside the room where Molly has had her unpleasant meeting with Miriam Manchester. Molly is leaning against the wall and Manchester is pinching her on the chin. Molly resents it and says to hin: "DO YOU WANT TO GET YOUR FACE SLAPPED."(sic) He continues to annoy Molly and in her efforts to get away from him, bumps into the door to the next room. It flys (sic) open and Molly makes an unceremonious entrance, followed by Manchester. Miriam is incensed and tells Molly: "EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE A SERVANT, YOU MIGHT CONDUCT YOURSELF LIKE A LADY." Molly turns to the butler and says: "MY UMBRELLA." To Miriam, Molly remarks in a very certain manner: "YOU CAN TAKE YOUR WASHING TO THE CHINAMAN AFTER THIS; HE'S NOT AS PARTICULAR AS WE ARE." The butler gives Molly her umbrella and she starts for the door. As a parting shot, Molly turns and says to Miriam: "DON'T FORGET, ALL LADIES ARE NOT IN SOCIETY." Molly has discovered it is raining and is very reluctant about putting up her umbrella. It is pouring so hard, that she has no alternative. With a thrust she puts it up and a shower of cakes fall to the floor. Molly haughtily picks up her skirts and exits. To Miriam, Dr. Bryant turns and remarks: "I ADMIRE HER SPIRIT." The incident irises out with Molly walking along the middle of the road in the pouring rain.

TO SHARE HER TROUBLES WITH ONE WHO WOULD UNDERSTAND is the title opening the next incident. Molly is sitting beside the philosopher. "WHY ARE YOU SO SERIOUS," he questions, and Molly tells him her troubles, finishing with "-- AND I'M AFRAID I MADE A SHOW OF MYSELF RIGHT IN FRONT OF THAT ELEGANT DOCTOR." Together they have tea, and Molly thinks of the cakes in her pocket. They each have one, and he questions: "DID YOUR MOTHER MAKE THEM?" Molly's head wants to nod yes, but she finally manages to make it move from side to side and then says: "I SWIPED THEM." The philosopher gently chides her and Molly stops him with: "LISTEN -- I'D A HAD A LOT MORE IF IT HADN'T BEEN RAINING." The scene irises out and we iris in on title:

SUNDAY MORNING. We see the exterior of a church and then some kids shooting dice. From behind a pile of large pipes, Molly peers with the title WHEN MOLLY DIDN'T SEE HER BROTHER IN CHURCH, SHE KNEW WHERE TO LOOK FOR HIM. Molly stops the game and tells the kids: "I DON'T BLAME MY BROTHER AS MUCH AS I DO THE REST OF YOU." Molly has caught her brother gambling again, and as she starts to lead him off, one of the kids remarks: "IT'S MIGHTY FUNNY YOU NEVER BREAK UP OUR GAME TILL YOUR BROTHER IS WAY AHEAD." Molly takes her brother to the minister in his study at the church and says to the Minister: "I PROMISED NOT TO TELL FATHER, IF HE WOULD LISTEN TO YOU." The minister reproves the boy and sends him home. Molly is taken by surprise when she discovers that seated in an arm chair in the study is Dr. Bryant. As he looks up from the papers he has been studying, Molly completely embarrassed, blurts out: "HOW DO YOU DO -- EXCUSE ME -- I MEAN SOMEBODY IS SICK?" The minister remarks to the Doctor: "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU AND MISS O'DAIR WERE ACQUAINTED." Molly speaks up: "OH YES; WE WERE BOTH CALLED IN WHEN MRS. MALJAN'S BABY WAS SICK." "I STILL HAVE MY CAR; MAY I GIVE YOU ANOTHER LIFT?" the Doctor asks Molly, and she graciously accepts. As the Doctor is about to leave, he shakes hands with the Minister and assures him: "THIS CHARITY BALL IS A HAPPY THOUGHT OF YOURS AND I WANT YOU TO COUNT ON ME FOR ANY ASSISTANCE IN MY POWER."

Rushing in to the O'Dair family, Jimmy O'Dair shouts: "WAIT TILL DANNY SMITH SEES MOLLY COMING HOME WITH A REGULAR GUY." As the Doctor's car pulls up, Molly says: "THANK YOU; THIS IS WHERE I LIVE." The Doctor steps out and as they both reach the gate, Molly is dumbfounded to see the whole family staring out the front window. She hesitates for a second and then proceeds with the Doctor to her front door. Mrs. O'Dair greets them and says to the Doctor: "YOU'RE WELCOME TO DINNER IF YOU DON'T MIND OLD FASHIONED COOKING." The Doctor accepts the invitation and Molly rushes in to her father with "PUT ON YOUR SHOES, POP; WE HAVE COMPANY." Dr. Bryant follows and Molly introduces her dad with: "THIS IS MY FATHER." Her father points to Danny and Molly turns to him and then to Dr. Bryant. "THIS IS DANNY SMITH -- HE COMES TO VISIT FATHER," she is careful to add. Molly starts the phonograph and Danny attempts to dance with her. She tells him to "SIT DOWN AND LISTEN TO THE MUSIC." Going over to Dr. Bryant, Jimmy decides he will assist in entertaining Molly's company. "I'LL SHOW YOU SOME FUNNY PICTURES OF THE FAMILY," he says to the doctor and then goes and gets the family album. Turning the pages, he comes to a picture and without hardly looking at it, says: "HERE'S A SCREAM OF A PICTURE -- MOLLY AND ME." The doctor looks, and Jimmy, examining it more closely, discovers that Molly's picture has been cut out and only his remains. He takes the album to Molly, who is out in the hall, and questions her about it. She says to him "YOU'RE TOO SMART," and they start to argue. From the kitchen Mrs. O'Dair calls: "CAN'T YOU STOP QUARRELING TILL THE COMPANY GOES?" Molly goes back to Dr. Bryant who meanwhile has discovered the secret. Together they fold the paper and place it back in the album, and as she gently draws her hand out of the doctor's, her brief happiness is rudely awakened by "BRING THAT YOUNG MAN TO THE TABLE, MOLLY; DINNER IS READY." The family are seated at the table and Molly and Dr. Bryant join them. Dishes are passed around, back and forth and across the table. The doctor remarks during the meal: "BY THE WAY, I HOPE WE ARE ALL DOING WHAT WE CAN TO MAKE THE COMING CHARITY BALL A SUCCESS." Danny Smith speaks up, saying: "MOLLY AND ME ARE GOING." The Doctor says: "I WILL BE GLAD TO HAVE YOU JOIN MY PARTY." Danny remarks: "I LIKE A MASKED BALL -- IF A ROUGH HOUSE STARTS NOBODY KNOWS WHO DID IT." When the meal is finished and the Doctor is about to leave, Tim O'Dair comes to the front door and addresses him with: "NOW YOUNG MAN, YOU'RE WELCOME TO YOUR DINNER, AND I'M GLAD TO KNOW YOU, BUT I'D LIKE YOU BETTER IF I NEVER SAW YOU IN THIS HOUSE AGAIN." Dr. Bryant says: "I DON'T UNDERSTAND," and Tim answers, "THEN I'LL MAKE IT CLEAR; I DON'T WANT MY DAUGHTER MAKING FRIENDS WITH FANCY DUDES WHO DRIVE HIGH-TONED CARS AND WEAR PLUG HATS." The doctor bows out and Molly says as he is about to leave the porch: "YOU MUSN'T MIND FATHER; HE'S A LITTLE OLD FASHIONED." Still Molly is not satisfied and she rushes to the gate to say to Dr. Bryant: "I'M NOT ASHAMED OF FATHER, BUT I'M DISAPPOINTED IN HIM." Dr. Bryant assures Molly with: "I THINK YOUR FATHER DESERVES CREDIT FOR JUST SAYING WHAT HE MEANS." Molly comes back into the living room, where Tim O'Dair is waiting for her. He has heard her refer to him as being old fashioned and he opens with: "MAYBE I AM OLD FASHIONED; THAT'S WHY I WORK MY FINGERS TO THE BONE TO RAISE A DECENT FAMILY." In a rage he points to his helper and says: "THERE'S DANNY SMITH, NEVER MISSED A DAY'S WORK IN HIS LIFE AND WOULD MAKE AS FINE A HUSBAND AS I EVER LAID EYES ON." Molly answers: "THERE'S LOTS OF PEOPLE WEARING GOOD CLOTHES JUST AS RESPECTABLE AS DANNY SMITH." "MAYBE SO -- BUT YOU WON'T PUT YOUR FOOT OUTSIDE OF THIS HOUSE TO GO TO THAT CHARITY BALL," replies Tim, as he delivers this final crushing blow to Molly, and she exits, while he sits down to read his paper, holding it upside down in his anger. Jimmy O'Dair, sitting across the room, notices it, and shouts: "HEY, POP; YOU'RE UPSIDE DOWN." This closes the incident.

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