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Old Nonsense Quotes

Did you like that? You did? Okay then, here's some more!

Good Advice #34: Remember--FIRST you pillage, THEN you burn!
-- Some Guy
Powerful Statement #13 You will find no one who can give you a persuasive reason why we observe Daylight Savings Time.
There is an inn, a merry old inn,
beneath an old grey hill,
And there they brew a beer so brown
That the Man in the Moon himself came down
one night to drink his fill.

The ostler had tipsy cat
that plays a five-stringed fiddle;
And up and down he runs his bow,
Now squeaking high, now purring low,
now sawing in the middle.
-- JRR Tolkien

The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "right here, officer". Later, I parked it on the freeway, got out, and yelled at all the cars, "Get out of my driveway!" -- Steven Wright
Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo! --Steven Wright
Very funny, Scotty, now beam down my clothes. --Reportedly Captain Kirk
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe,
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
--Lewis Carroll
The universe was created by a big bang. --various foolish scientists
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Some poems rhyme,
And some don't!
Hey diddle diddle,
Stuck in the middle
With nothing to call your own.
Not a cat nor a cow,
Not a moo nor meow,
Not even an icecream cone.
--Laura Fischer
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