I got trapped in that role
The butt of every laugh
I can’t break free
Or else they’d know
I wasn’t being me
I hate being this fraud
But what else do I know?
I get angry
But don’t let them know why
They just think I’m mean
I look at my family
They don’t like me anymore
Yes, I know they love me,
we’re related
But they don’t like me
Yet I’m still stuck not being me
Never free
~
Death captivates my every thought
My mind spinning with images of suffering
Hatred blackens my soul
it’s essence crumbling like charcoal
Why does pain make me laugh?
Anger my only smile?
Twisted morals
Integrity lost on me
~
Too tired to even cry
Too scared to find reasons why
Too weak to run from you
Too lost to care for the truth
~
Standing face to face
bare souls on display
so much disgrace
I close my eyes
and lose my sight
as you leave, I cry
~
Stuck with a mirror that won't lie to me
Trapped in a world where I don’t want to be
Hidden by the failures, drowning in spells cast
Lost in dreams of the tomorrow now past
~
Too tired for barriers
Too wasted for lies
Used against me
Helping weaken my disguise
Betrayed by the secret you never gave
Promises now dust, scattered, no name
You let me fall for you before letting me know
The darkest part of your soul, your smiles were for show
Left longing for the return of blessed ignorance
To believe you were perfect once again
~
How I wish I turned out more like you
How I wish I could change the one I am
But wishing will not bring my hopes to reality
The only possibility is a reincarnation of my soul
To reawaken the fire of ambition
Set spinning the chain reaction
~
We’re all screwed up
All crazy
The path to sanity shrouded with guilt
The way forward hazy
~
While I’m alone
I’m safe
It’s when I’m in a crowd of strangers
I have to hide my face
~
A wasted youth spent dreaming, crying
Trying to live up to others expectations
Learning things are never what they seem
The hard way, through failing and miscommunication’s
~
Respect. A dialect you cannot comprehend
The language of your fist, please desist it’s usage
Turn around the bend
