A thesis statement is an objective statement, not a personal one.
A Personal Statement: I don't believe a Bigfoot could exist in the wilds of North America. An Objective Statement: The facts do not support the existence of a large, unknown hominid like Bigfoot.
A thesis statement must be
more than a fact.
A reasonable person should be able to argue against it..
Fact or observation: People use many lawn chemicals. Thesis: People are ruining the environment with chemicals merely to keep their lawns clean.
Create a complete sentence that details the conclusion.
The thesis should be similar to the title, but it must be a complete sentence that explains in some detail what the writer expects to write about. Don't just announce a subject. NEVER begin a thesis with a phrase like any of these: "I believe that…." "This paper will show that…."
"The thesis of this paper is…."
Announcement: The thesis of this paper is Social Security and old age. A complete sentence detailing the conclusion: Continuing changes in the Social Security System makes it almost impossible to plan intelligently for one's retirement.
Focus!
Unfocused: The American steel industry has many problems. Focused: The primary problem in the American steel industry is the lack of funds to renovate outdated plants and equipment.
Unfocused: Hemingway's war stories are very good. Focused: Hemingway's stories helped create a new prose style by employing extensive dialogue, shorter sentences, and strong Anglo-Saxon words.
A thesis statement has one main point. Don't try to tackle two topics at once, even if they seem related. Pick one and stick with it.
More than one main point: Stephen Hawking's physical disability has not prevented him from becoming a world-renowned scientist, and his book is the subject of a movie. One Main point: Stephen Hawking's physical disability has not prevented him from becoming a world renowned physicist.
