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Song of Songs 8:6-7
March 4, 2001 am
Ahhh. There is nothing more intrinquing or puzzling as love. Love causes one’s heart to ache or break. Love makes a person dizzy or dazzled. The power of love has brought down kingdoms and raised up honor. Love can be intoxicating like a drug. However love has struck you, you know when you have been hit.
When I had returned home from my first year of college, I came to a state with a depressed economy. Part-time summer jobs were very difficult to find. I knew that Naomi was my love and I was hers. I wanted so much to take her out on for dinner but I lacked the money to do so. So what did I do? I slung an old newspaper carrier bag over my shoulder, hopped on my ten speed bike and rode up and down the country roads in search of pop cans and bottles. I collected enough to take her out that Friday night.
Love endured between us even as a poor Bible College student. And as we continue our discussion on True Love in Marriage I want to lift some scripture from the Song of Songs.
The Song of Songs is perhaps the most interesting book of the Scriptures. Traditionally referred as the Song of Solomon, there is nothing to ever indicate that Solomon, the husband of 714 wives, ever wrote this book. There are some references to King Solomon, but that does not give us the author. So, we will leave the author in anonymity. The Song of Songs was probably written several hundred years after Solomon and those references were simply a taunt at a man who never matured to realizing what real love was all about.
The theme of the Song of Songs is faithful love. The symbolism and imagery drawn from the countryside of Canaan land creates an atmosphere that is both simple and pure. This atmosphere of love is cast against the luxury and vices of the royalty. Where sex is abused by those in the royal court, this book depicts sexual love as a gift from God. Its poetic form makes this book perhaps the most beautiful in the Bible.
A village girl who works in the vineyards marries a young shepherd. While working in the vineyard, King Solomon’s cortege passes by and he spots her. The King, who is the law, brings her back to his royal palace hoping to razzle her with the pomp and splendor of his royalty. All is in vain. True to her virtuous love, she resists all of the allurements, spurns his promises of vain glory. Her affections are sacredly pledged to her husband. Solomon, convinced that he cannot win her over, allows her to quit the royal residence and return with her husband to her native place. (Gray and Adams)
Which we pick up in Song of Songs 8:6-7
Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is a strong as death. its jealously unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned.
What about love? We must understand that love comes from God. You cannot see love but you can feel love. We must also understand that love is a choice. You choose to love the one that God brought into your life. Marriage is no game and the particpants are not players. This is reality and the only the wise and serious, with God’s help, survive.
There are three elements of love that brings uniqueness and durability to a marriage.
1. Love is Unforgettable
True love cannot be forgotten or lost. When I fell in love with Naomi we were teenagers with our whole lives ahead of us. Now that we are a third of the way to that big five-oh we have learned that life has its ups and downs. Richer and poorer are real distinctions and love fills the belly for only so long. But through all the hard times we did not lose our love for each other as a man might lose a bet or a job or money.
The love we share is a jealous love. Let me clarify that verse “its jealousy unyielding as the grave.” This is a casual way of saying “My love is until death.” “With every waking and conscious moment I love you.” This is an agape love for your spouse, not a suspicious attachment. This a love that is “Til do you part.”
I know those who are so untrusting of their spouses that it can be sickening. They think someone is out to get their mate. I’m not always sure of their problem except to say that if you see someone with extreme jealousy it is quite likely that the jealous one may have something to hide.
See that part in verse six concerning fire? “It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.” This could be just as easily interpreted as “like the very flame of the Lord.”
This love that we have for our spouse, should burn deep within us. It should be like the very flame of the Lord. When you understand that love comes from God then you can understand that your love for your spouse comes from God. God did not create love. Love emanates from His holy character and emulates God Himself. And this deep commitment and even sensual love we share between us is a gift from God.
Let me say this: There is nothing dirty about sex. I am dismayed at the amount of disfunction in Christian homes. A wife may view sex as an anomaly; that is, there is something wrong with it. And therefore, strife developes between two people that God brought together. A husband may make particular demands that makes his wife feel cheap and dirty. What God intended is that sex be used as a means of communication between a husband and wife. This sexual communication is more than a physical desire but an emotional need of fulfillment and enjoyment.
Tim LaHaye has some materials that can be helpful for your marriage. More specifically, The Act of Marriage and The Act of Marriage After Forty I would highly recommend.
Maybe you know someone who is having difficulty in this area. My suggestion would be to refer them to a Christian agency such as Bethany Christian Services. Don’t let Satan rob a couple of the blessing and grace of God. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”
2. Love is Unquenchable
Who can resist true love? Who can quench the love that you have for your spouse?
Satan will try every conceivable way to deceive your marriage vows. He will strive to bring down your wedding day and the commitment that you made.
In what ways, though is your love unquenched?
“Love is as strong as death” and more powerful than life. When you are in love you do not forget who you are in love with. And herein lies the challenge for those of us who are old-timers in this business of marriage: Love is bigger than life. Even death itself cannot defeat love.
Our own inconsistencies cannot drown out love. Each one of us is wierd and odd. All of us have quirks. Who can forget Grandma Walton saying to Grandpa Walton, “You old fool!” Sure they disagreed and had quirks but they understood that their love stood for something that was bigger than themselves.
My own unworthiness cannot quench love. I do not deserve the wife I have but yet she does not lord that over me. I am confident of Naomi’s love. I have no question. And despite of how unworthy I may feel, her love is and has always been there for me.
3. Love is Unpurchasable.
King Solomon could easily lavish all the riches of his kingdom in order to win over the many beautiful women that were on hand. But here’s the rub: the poor Shulammite girl in this story spurned his advances. Look in verse seven:
“If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned.”
You just simply cannot buy love. The fancy cars, the big houses, the fat paychecks and the vacation home cannot buy real, foolproof love.
Now that is not to say, guys, that we become cheapskates. Buy your toots a flower or take her out to dinner. Take her out on the town. Give her a good time. Let her know that you love her. Women like to be lavished on but they don’t demand it. Just do it. Take care of the queen of your heart. Get her a box of chocolates. Show her that you love her. Do little things for her.
Do you know what my wife likes? She loves her feet to be rubbed. It costs me about five minutes of my day that supposedly belongs to God anyway.
But do you what she wants the most? My time and attention. She wants me to listen to her and hear what she has to say. She wants me to believe in her. She just wants me.
Wives, your husband needs your support. He needs your faithfulness. He needs you.
Couples you need each other. And as a couple you need the Holy Spirit.
What I would like to do in closing is this: Men. Take the flower that you have received. When we stand I want you to turn to your wife and ask her to marry you. Just like the old days. Ask her. And if she says “Yes” hand her your flower. She is
Ladies, as you accept this flower you are also signifying that you are accepting his love for you and you are offering your love to him.
Why are we doing this? Some of us need to fall in love again. We need to return to that simple place called agape. A place of unconditional love for each other.
And how can this be done? With nothing else but the Holy Spirit. Your marriage needs the strength and power that the Holy Spirit makes available to all of us.
