Well, anyone who knows me knows that I like toys, and well, I just couldn't resist compiling this little vignette starring my latest action figure, Aquaman: The Worlds Most Worthless Superhero!
"I am not worthless!"
Poor guy. He's delusional. Here's more or less his first adventure in my dorm room, as he meets just a few of my other figures.
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"I wonder where I am. This certainly is a strange surrounding."
"Greetings, Strange gold-colored man."
"Who are you?!!!"
"I am He-Man. The Most Powerful Man in the Universe!
"But you have no pants!"
"That's not important. Who might you be strange man?"
"I'm Aquaman. I can breathe underwater, and talk to fish!"
"Fascinating. Well, Aquaman, talker with fishes, gill haver, I shall show you the sights and sounds of this strange land. It's very heartbeat, and..."
"Get on with it, you insufferable boob! Otherwise, face the wrath of Skeletor!"
"Never mind him, friend, he's cranky because he sounds like a whiny bitch. Let us traverse and I will show you things."
"Char! Char!"
"Back, evil sprite of tail-fire!"
"Your time has come."
"What was that all about, he wasn't going to hurt us! You're crazy!"
"You may be right, but one must be safe. This place is dangerous."
"Halt! Who passes before Green Lantern?"
"Aquaman? The world's most worthless superhero?"
"I am not worthless!"
"Whatever. I'll see you guys later."
"Isn't there anyone around here who I can level with? I'm a nice guy. I just want a friend."
"Ah, He-Man. At last we are alone!"
"Back, villian!"
"Your time has come."
"What the hell did you do that for?!!"
"Well, I..."
"He was obviously aquatic! He could have been my best friend!"
"That does it, He-Psycho! I am outta here before you axe me up too!"
(sigh)"I just want to belong."
"Wait! What's that?"
"Wow. This is great. Just like home. I can get used to this, no problem!"
"Yo! Aqua-bitch! Let's go."
"I want to go home."