Colin awoke to the sound of voices. Briefly, he wondered if perhaps they were in his head, and he'd gone insane. He banished that notion when he realized that he recognized one of them. It belonged to Apocalypse.
He was talking to a woman, a young woman by the sound of it. Their voices rose and fell and Colin listened, unable to comprehend the meaning of the conversation for several moments because of the painful way his head was throbbing.
He reached up to put a hand to it, and was surprised when he discovered that his hand didn't move. Colin tried again, this time opening his eyes to see what was wrong. It was simple really; Colin was shackled to a metal table, the kind you find in doctors' offices. A bright light hung overhead, shining directly in his eyes and making his headache worse. Colin closed his eyes.
Slowly, he rotated each of his wrists and then his ankles, testing the strength of the shackles which held him. They were some hard metal, probably adamantium. He didn't even bother trying to use his powers; he felt the inhibitor collar around his neck all too clearly.
He lay there for several moments, feeling extremely exposed, as he tried to remember what had ended him up here and given him this God-awful headache.
I saw Apocalypse, he thought. I saw him, and all I could think... all I could remember was what he'd done, even though I knew it wasn't him. Not really. Colin inwardly scolded himself for forgetting his training and loosing control in combat. I lost it. I think I was going to kill him. And I mean really kill him. Or try, in any case. Then something happened and the wall was coming at me, way too fast, and..... Colin stopped, not having to look any further for an answer. In other words, I lost my head and got clobbered.
Colin began to listen to Apocalypse's conversation. "It should be relatively simple. His powers are already such that all you must do is alter them. I trust you can handle that, Dr. Neilsen?"
"Of course. You doubt me? This will be the easiest operation I've performed since you hired me."
Operation? The hairs on the back of Colin's neck stood on end. Who's being operated on? Suddenly he felt even more helpless and exposed, if that were possible.
"So it won't be any problem, then?"
"None at all."
"Excellent. When will you begin?"
"Whenever you wish. All is ready."
At this statement, Colin opened his eyes again and looked around. It confirmed his worst fears when he spotted a metal table nearby containing medical equipment. At the moment, they looked more like instruments of torture.
"All right," he heard Apocalypse say, "Start as soon as possible."
Colin squeezed his eyes shut and said a quick prayer. He heard footsteps approaching.
A low, amused, chuckle sounded from above him. He opened his eyes again. There was a woman standing above him.
"God can't help you now," she said, in the same, low tone that she'd addressed Apocalypse with, "He never listens when you really need Him."
She smiled a dark smile as she looked down at him. "I'm Dr. Roberta Neilsen. The woman who will be opperating on you shortly."
Her dark brown eyes glimmered with an evil kind of mischief as she reached over to the table to prepare the equipment. Her light brown hair fell partially out of a loose ponytail and into her face. To Colin's horror, she actually began humming softly.
"Now, see," she continued, "I'm about the greatest surgeon ever born. I also happen to be a mutant myself." She knelt by him, looking into his eyes with her cold unflinching ones. "Most people say I can 'tamper' with mutant abilities and with memories if I have direct access. Do you know what that's a nice way of saying?" Her smile grew wider, showing a few teeth.
He looked up at her, squinting through the light. "N-no..."
"It means I can cut you open," she said brutally, and Colin flinched. "And make you do whatever I want you to. It's really quite simple. People's brains are actually quite easy to manipulate, once you know how. First, I'll play with your abilities so that you can no longer empathically detect any positive emotions. Only pain and rage, and terror."
Colin closed his eyes as she continued, beginning to feel sick. "Then, I'll sift through every one of your memories. Everything you never wanted someone to know, I'll see. Everything you thought was private, I'll know. And then, I'll erase every memory you have of anything good that's every happened to you. And replace them all with loyalty to Apocalypse."
Just as Colin thought it couldn't get any worse, she went on. "And Apocalypse wants me to do him one more little favor." She touched Colin's cheek, urging him to open his eyes. "He wants," Dr. Neilsen said, "For me to find out what this is."
She reached into her pocket and pulled out a shining, muti-faceted crystal. It was glowing a faint pink. Colin recognized it, and swallowed. It was the piece of the M'Kraan crystal. The one he'd had in his pocket.
The doctor grinned a smile that wouldn't have been out of place on a demon. "You might want to close your eyes now," she advised. "I'm not in the habit of giving my patients pain killer."
Colin obediantly squeezed his eyes shut and waited for the operation to begin.
Autumn opened her eyes and found herself staring up at the ceiling of the med-lab, back at the mansion. Her head ached, and she had the nagging impression that something was wrong. Not wrong as in 'I'm in a different world'; she'd realized that as soon as she gained consciousness. It was wrong like something was missing.
She sat up hesitantly, put a hand to the back of her head. There was a bump the size of a cherry and she winced when she touched it.
Just then Hank came in. "Wonderful to see you're awake," he said, "For a moment or two I was afraid you perhaps had something more than just a bump on your head. You've been out for quite awhile; your body regressed to an unconscious state to fend off any possible serious injuries."
She looked at him. "What happened?"
"You were knocked out when a robot flew into your head, full speed. Sam carried you back to the Blackbird."
She blinked once, and then the memories came flooding back to her. "Colin...?" she asked.
Beast shook his head. "Due to the unexpected amount of guards, it was found prudent to let him stay for the time being. I'm sorry."
Autumn stood up so quickly that her head spun, but she didn't care. Beast stepped towards her, saying something that was probably meant to comfort her, but she didn't care about that, either. She knocked him back with the sweep of a wing, and jumped out the window.
On the way to the mansion, Autumn had kept track of every turn they took; unable to see, she'd had nothing better to do. She flew now to the one place that stood out in her mind. She remembered looking up once and seeing a thousand tiny, glowing, dots; the way candles looked in her vision.
It was there that she flew now, the only sounds to reach her ears the noises of the traffic, voices so very far below, and the flapping of her own leathery wings.
She reached the place in minutes and was not at all surprised to find that it was a church. Autumn landed on the roof, pulled back into the shadows, and waited. They would search for her a while at first, she knew, but the coming of daylight would stall their progress because the fliers wouldn't be able to move about the air as freely. Then, she would go aand find her brother.
Searing, white hot agony tore at his nerves, blinded him. His head was a jumble of a hundred feelings, none of them his, none of them right, none of them sane. He was angry, angry at the world for existing. How could it be, how could it go on uncaring as he was forced to take upon himself the feelings of countless others? If he had it his way, anything in his path would die. It didn't matter what it was or what it had or hadn't done wrong.
At the same time he felt incredibly sad, like everything he'd ever cared about was gone, wrenched away from him in a single heart-rending second, leaving only a gaping hole that needed desperately to be filled.
He felt as though the world were made of rubber, too. It seemed to spin around him, leaving his senses a jumbled mess. There were people standing right by him, talking, but he couldn't grasp what they were saying. The words seemed to twist and intertwine and dangle just out of his understanding.
The pain may have affected it, too. It was a bright agony, making him want to fall to the ground and stay there, untouched forever. He wanted only to lay down and die.
The hunger, too, made it impossible to concentrate. The knawing, empty feeling inside him was vast and painful. The torment it caused was unbearable, though he knew that nothing would stop it.
There was a woman nearby, a woman he hated more than all other things for some reason, ungraspable becauseof the pain, holding a crystal, waving it excitedly, and shouting. He'd seen it before, knew what it did. But he had known only in some other life, a life that seemed infinitely distant now.
Eventually, the words filtered in through the pain and confusion. Slowly at first, like hearing a tape played in reverse and then gradually righted, they began to make sense.
"Do you realize," the woman was shrieking, "What this means!?"
"Yes," replied the man, in a deep, booming tone. "It means we'll be taking a trip."
That seemed to stop the woman. "A trip? Where?"
"I'd like to see this... other world. To change it to suit my purposes... now that I know what went wrong."
The man looked to him now. "Come, Pain," the man said, and turned to leave the room. The one called Pain reflected that this was a good name to call him. It seemed that pain was all he felt right now, or ever had felt before.
Autumn awoke again around dusk. Soon they would be looking again. She walked to the edge of the church's roof and jumped off, spreading her wings to catch herself. She flew then, as fast and as hard as she could. She tried not to think as she flew, because she knew that if she thought, it would be about Colin. About what was happening to him.
What if they were hurting him? What if they had killed him? What if she got there, and it was already too late?
No, she told herself stubbornly, He'll be just fine. I'll get there and rescue him, and we can both go back to the Mansion and...
She stopped thinking about whether he was alive or dead and just concentrated on getting to him.
She flew on for what seemed an eternity, oblivious to the dull ache that grew in her wings and back with the passage of time. The wind howled coldly around her, and dread grew slowly in the pit of her stomach as she traveled back to Apocalypse's hideout. Soon, she wasn't sure which slowed her more, her rapidly tiring wings or the weight of the fear gathering inevitably inside her.
It seemed like hours before she finally reached the place, though she knew it couldn't have been that long. Her aching wings and back told another story, though. She wasn't even sure how she'd found it; she had simply needed to be there, needed to find it... and she had.
She landed somewhat awkwardly, folding her wings about two feet before she touched the ground. She stumbled a little, but that didn't stop her. Going to the door, Autumn was surprised to see that it was still torn open from their arrival. Hesitantly, she stepped inside, dread seeming to boil up out of the cold pit it formed in her stomach and spread into her mouth, leaving it dry and uncomfortable.
No sound greeted Autumn's ears. No clicking or grinding of the robots' gears as they prepared to repair the door, none of the anguished screams that she had been positive her brother would be letting loose as the monsters tortured him, not even the booming voice of Apocalypse, which she had expected to greet her. Only silence, terrible and final, ringing louder than a death scream in her ears.
She began to look then, almost terrified of what she would find. She discovered as much as she'd heard: nothing. Not a single being, living or mechanical, could be found in the horrible metal dungeon. Not a single robot could be seen, nor any of Apocalypse's other helpers could be detected in any way. Even Apocalypse himself had simply vanished.
It was only after she'd searched the entire place three times that it finally sank in. All the other disappearances had been acceptable, almost welcomed. But it wasn't just Apocalypse that was missing. Colin was gone as well.
She sank to her knees, a cry of anguish escaping her lips. Tears of fury and helplessness and terrer for her brother filled her solid red eyes. Shelet them fall; there was no shame if no one was there to see them. Sobbing desperately, she managed to choke out a prayer for Colin, who was alone somewhere with Apocalypse... and she was unable to help him.
Time had little meaning to the one called Pain. Every day was the same: agonizing, white hot pain, horrible, helpless terror, and an anger that raged madly out of control. Today was different, however. Not because of what he felt, but because of what was occuring.
They were in another place now; the man called Apocalypse had brought them there. He had done it with a glowing, pink rock, and Pain had felt something strange when Apocalypse used the rock to open a doorway. A little tug, almost, inside his chest, and the feeling that he should be doing something.... But that was senseless. Pain only needed to do what Apocalypse instructed him to do.
The place they had come to was different from the one they'd left in a lot of ways. At first, there had been two of the man called Apocalypse. It had been strange, and the confusion in Pain's mind had dominated for a while as the two fought each other. Eventually, the Apocalypse he knew as his master and instructor had triumphed. The other had died.
After that, Apocalypse had taken over the life of the other one, the one who had looked like him. Things seemed to be going smoothly. Occasionally, Apocalypse would even give Pain a chance to vent his rage, and then something would die. That was usually good.
Something was happening now, though, and Apocalypse and the woman named Dr. Neilsen were unhappy. The pink rock had been stolen, and Apocalypse had gotten it back.... but only barely.
And now, they had all arrived. He sensed snatches of the emotions of the people Apocalypse referred to as the X-Men. He sensed desperation and fear, but it was a strange kind of fear. It was fear for an idea, perhaps, more than anything.
These people and the followers of Apocalypse fought around them. Fought, fell, and lay perfectly still, not even breathing.... but somehow, this seemed to bother Pain more than it should have. He looked around through the eyeholes in the outfit Apocalypse had designed for him and saw something which struck him as strange. Not strange, but..... right somehow. And that was strange, because the one called Pain wasn't used to feeling anything that felt good or right.
The sight was simple, and it shook him badly. An old woman, a little girl, and a dark-skinned man stood before the large crystal. It wasn't those three that disturbed him though. It was the two in front of the trio, blocking them from harm.
They stood there, nervous and uncertain, but unwavering in their mission. They were both dirty and disheveled, sweaty and tense from the battle. The girl wrung her hands together worriedly, her strange, red eyes wide and searching. The boy tried to pretend that nothing was wrong for her sake, tried to be strong.
Pain felt connected to them somehow, felt as though he owed them something. Curious, he entered the mind of the girl to search for some clue. Her mind was strange but somehow comfortingly familiar, and it lacked emotions that he found familiar. No anger, no pain, and no fear could be found in her. Only a strange, nervous kind of hope.
She looked up towards him then, stared straight at him as he stood by Apocalypse's side. A confused expression crossed her face, then, and her brow wrinkled slightly. "Colin...?" she asked softly, and although the word was no more than a whisper, it carried to him over the screams of the wounded and dying, bringing with it a flood of memories.
It all came back in a rush: the M'Kraan crystal, Autumn, the battle with the robots, Destiny, Illyana, Bishop, and himself.... Colin Grey.
The force of it caused him to gasp, it was so sudden, and he nearly fell to his knees. Vaguely, he realized that, beside him, Apocalypse took from some hidden place the shard of the M'Kraan crystal. The monster held it tightly, seeming to gloat over those who fell and died around him. The crystal shimmered, glowing quietly, as Apocalypse tried one final plan.
With dawning realization, it struck Colin what Apocalypse was doing; he was opening a portal into the crystal. He was escaping!
Suddenly, the boy who had once been known as Pain knew what to do. Colin gathered all the negative emotions that Apocalypse had forced into him. He called up all the horrible memories of the agony he'd endured by feeling others' suffering. He summoned it up with all of his will and held it inside, forcing himself not to let it go. The hurt was so great that tears came to his eyes and black spots blurred his vision. Apocalypse's newest horseman, the one that had been known as Pain, reached out to Apocalypse.
With all his strength and all his will, Colin forced the terrible pain and grief out through his arm. It left him, seething and writhing, and entered the one whose arm he touched: Apocalypse. The man cried out as the raw emotion flooded through him, and he dropped the shard of M'Kraan crystal. Suddenly, there was a flash of light, and Colin was temporarily blinded.
He knew, however, that he had to do one more thing before he could allow himself to rest. He shoved Apocalypse into the screaming Dr. Neilsen and ran forward, as fast as he could. He ran blindly, guided only by what he knew to be right. He moved to the spot where the two children had been, the boy and the girl.... His sister and he. Reaching out with both hands, he shoved them backwards firmly, pushing as hard as he could, and he tumbled forwards, slamming into the ground hard. And then it felt as though he'd fallen off of a cliff, gone from solid ground to thin air.
Opening his eyes again, he saw the pink brilliance of the crystal and endless pictures of endless possibilities stretched before him. He fell downwards past the pictures, into the future.
Colin knew without seeing what had happened to the boy and girl; he had already lived it. He had given them a chance, a chance to live in a world where the dream could live on. He had given that world a chance, too, had given a chance to the world that should have been.
The End
