Okay, time for a REAL disclaimer for a change. I've decided to lay down some laws. Just a few basic rules to follow whilst viewing my oh-so-libido-charging site ;)
1. Please leave all anal-retentiveness at YOUR webpage. Don't bring it to mine.
2. If you have a concern/problem with my site, blow it out your ass. For directions, please go here.
3. There is no # 3.
4. Just remember, to assume makes an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
5. I, Kim, reserve all rights to shag, probe and/or kill all those who view my site.
6. Big Brother IS watching.
7. If viewing my site causes any sort of pain at all, including flu-like symptoms, explosive diarrhea, and/or asexual reproduction, then it's damn COOL, and you should be happy.
8. There isn't a # 8 either.
9. The meaning to life can not be found on my website. Again, please see here.
10. God is dead.
11. Or not, I could be wrong.
12. Don't look at me that way! I'm not anti-God!
13. It was a freakin' joke! Come back!!
14. This site contains funny material. At least I think so, dammit. So, if you're not laughing, and you haven't been pronounced legally dead yet, you suck and there's no hope for you.
15. Andi sucks.
16. Owen told me.
17. Sign the Guestbook.
18. It's a rule, so you HAVE to!
19. Shaddup and sign it, goddammit!
20. Don't make me come over there!
21. Some material may not be suitable for those over 18, as anal-retentiveness increases with age.
22. It's all fun and games until someone's head falls off.
23. You must have watched Dumb & Dumber at least 47 times before viewing my website. (This can be replaced by watching 3 different Cheech and Chong movies, or if you've seen any movie with the word "tit" in it.)
24. The laws of mathematics do not apply. To anything. Anytime. Dammit.
25. Therefore, 1 + 1 = hot, kinky sex.
26. If a schizophrenic is masterbating, does it count as an orgy?
27. If a schizophrenic attempts suicide, is it considered a hostage situation?
28. No more schizo jokes allowed.
29. Blond jokes, on the other hand, are encouraged.
30. Sex is recommended in the champagne room. Just don't leave stains. Of any sort. -_-()
I agree! Lemme in!
I'm a dorkass who doesn't agree to these rules!
