Anybody who thinks they know
everything ain’t been around long
enough to know anything.
If you wake up and find
yourself a success, you ain’t
been asleep.
If you’ve done it,
it ain’t worth braggin’ about.
Do not shoot at the horse;
shoot at the jackass ridin’ it.
If you want a little extra attention,
ask your husband if you can borrow
his six-shooter for the night.
Cryin’ about a bad past
is a waste of good tears.
Don’t burn the house down
to kill a rat.
If ya wanna say no, it’s
best to say it right away.
When a cowboy gives you the keys
to his truck, you know you’re close
to winning the keys to his heart.
Nothings don’t
deserve all the thought people
give em’.
A good man is hard to
find, but it’s not hard
to find a hard man.
Everything is better shared.
The bigger the belt buckle
the smaller the dick.
The smaller the cowboy; the
bigger the dick and the bigger
the cowboy the smaller the dick.
Opinions are like assholes
everbodies got ‘em and most
times they stink.
Don’t assume things cuz’
it makes an a-s-s out of -u
and m-e.
Life’s little survival kit:
1. Sex
2. Beer
3. Country
Beer it’s the only thing
a cowboy needs to survive,
besides his truck.
If rodeo were easy they’d
call it football.
Why can’t guys be like dogs?
1. Dogs never bitch
2. They obey
It’s tough to walk away
from something you love,
but sometimes it’s the
only way.
Premature ultimatums
generally result from
immature considerations.
Don’t let anybody’s opinion
fool your belief in yourself.
You can’t know everything,
but neither can anybody else.
A promise is a promise kept.
That’s how it goes on
the cowgirl trail.
Before you get serious about
a cowboy, make sure he values
you more than his truck.
Most everything you hear about
a cowboy is true, but the important
thing is they take care of their cows.
Always say “please” when
you tell somebody “shut up”.
Most hard-boiled people
are really only half-baked.
Never let yourself be drawn
into a game where you don’t
know the rules- ALL the rules.
A good man is hard to find,
but it sure is fun looking.
Foolin’ a man ain’t all that hard.
Findin’ one that ain’t a fool is a
lot harder.
“One of these days” is
“None of these days”.
You don’t have to wait for
someone to send you flowers,
plant your own garden.
When kissin’ a cowboy in the
rain, make sure you both
fit under his hat.
When you’re workin’ a horse or dealin’
with a man, take it slow, take it easy,
and don’t rustle em’.
If you don’t have a good reason to do
somethin’, then you have a damn good
reason not to do it.
It’s no big deal cleaning house...
cookin’ meals, or doin’ laundry.
More men should try it.
A wedding ring should
cut off the wearers circulation.
If you build walls around
yourself, don’t be surprised
if it gets lonely in there.
There’s no future in
livin’ in the past.
The marines aren’t the only
ones looking for, “a few good men”.
Someday my prince will come...
(And I’ll probably be passed out drunk.)
Someday I’ll find a man and live
happily ever after. (Yeah right! Only
in the fairy tales.)
A heart must be givin’ to
gain the heart of another.
A lot of what a man knows,
a woman knows better.
Whenever you go away
always come back before
they learn to get on
without you.
A man who wears spurs has
high expectations. A woman
who wears spurs has a mind
of her own.
Avoid becoming emotional
over a jackass.
Horses always start,
they never run out of gas,
and they will never get
you greasy.
Men- you can’t live with em’
and you can’t shoot em’.
Bolony is bolony;
no matter how thin
you slice it.
Just because a man says it’s
so, doesn’t mean it is.
Ride the high country, see
through God’s eyes; Ride the desert
feel God’s strength; Ride the prairies
hear God’s voice.
Ride a horse of a different color,
sometimes change is good.
If we can send one man to the
moon, why can’t we send the rest?
Before you give someone a
piece of your mind, make sure
you can get by with what’s left.
Save the horse;
Ride the cowboy.
So many men...
So little time.
A fool and his money- sounds
like my kind a guy.
Any minute now men
are going to start to make since.
Men are like politicians;
Promises:
More Promises;
Promises Broken,
More Promises Broken.
If you wake up next to
someone you don’t know,
Might as well ask.
Why ask why? Please
don’t try Bud Dry.
“It won’t go in.”
What a likely excuse.
RODEO... Everything
else is just a game.
I’m not racist I
believe al Mexicans
should go back to
Mexico.
Make everything in
life like a bowl of peaches:
wet, slimy and fun.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
babies come e-z
so watch who you screw,
Barker 13:3
Drink beer, have fun,
love em’, leave em’,
there’s nothing not to it.
Nights are long,
beer is fresh,
so ride hard.
Cowboys are My Weakness!
A man desires the satisfaction of his desire;
a woman desires the condition of desiring.
Freedom’s just another word for
nothing left to lose.
In every assumption is contained
the possibility of its opposite.
Cowboys:
They lie to us,
they cheat on us,
and we love them more for it.
It’s our fault,
we raise them to be like that.
Men always cheat on the best woman.
Love means letting go of fear.
The West isn’t a place that gives itself up easily.
Newcomers have to sink into it slowly,
to descend through its layers.
Why is it that cowboy’s trucks
are always leaving,
never coming home?
What I am is enough,
if only I would be it openly.
Language can’t touch the
joyful and slightly disconcerting feeling
of being very much in love.
It’s like meeting the man of your dreams
And then meeting his beautiful girlfriend.
Isn’t ironic?
Love is in the kiss.
Words are the pen of the heart,
but music is in the pen of the soul.
Honesty is something you can’t wear out.
It’s better to be know by six people for something you’re proud of
than by 60 million for something you’re not.
It you’re treading water,
you’re losing ground.
Recovering from failure is
often easier than building from success.
All our souls are written in our eyes.
Loving can cost a lot,
but not loving always costs more,
and those who fear to love often find
that want of love is an emptiness
that robs the joy from life.
That common cold of the male psyche,
fear of commitment.
Love is an attempt to change
a piece of a dream world into reality.
Love cures people,
the ones who receive love
and the ones who give it, too.
Where love rules,
there is no will to power;
and where power predominates,
there love is lacking.
The one is the shadow of the other.
Believing that a girl will wait
is just like jumping with a parachute
packed by someone else.
On the whole,
I haven't found men unduly loath to say,
“I love you.”
The real trick is to get them to say,
“Will you marry me?”
A broken heart is what makes life
so wonderful five years later,
when you see the guy in an elevator
and he is fat and smoking a cigar
and saying long-time-no-see.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong.
So often when we say “I love you”
we say it with a huge “I” and a small “you.”
The first duty of love is to listen.
Sex is too often topic A,
but also topic B and C as well.
What I have is nothing,
compared to what I want.
I’ve got your memory
she’s got you.
I’ve got to be somebody myself
Before I can be somebody’s wife.
You’re out doing
While I’m here doing without
The more I heard
The less I feel
The more I know
The less I rest
in this lone-star state of mind.
If you could read my mind
then you’d know how hard I tried
But I can’t understand
Can’t understand why you left my love behind
So when we meet as friends
My heart will break again
But if that’s how the story goes
I can’t understand
