The Insiders Guide
To The Male Vocabulary
"Haven't I seen you before?"
= "Nice butt."
"I'm a Romantic."
= "I'm poor."
"I need you."
= "My hand is tired."
"I am different from all the other guys."
= "I am not circumcised."
"You're the only girl I've ever cared about."
= "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."
"I really want to get to know you better."
= "So I can tell my friends about it."
"It's just orange juice, try it."
= "3 more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head."
"She's kinda cute."
= "I wouldn't kick her out of bed but a pillow over the head might be necessary."
"I don't know if I like her."
= "She won't sleep with me."
"Was it good for you?"
= "I'm insecure about my manhood."
"I had a wonderful time last night."
= "Who the hell are you?"
"Do you love me?"
= "I've done something stupid and you might find out."
"Do you 'really' love me?"
= "I've done something stupid and you're going to find out sooner or later."
"How much do you love me?"
= "I've done something really stupid and someone's on their way to tell you by now."
"I have something to tell you."
= "Get tested."
"I'll give you a call."
= "I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than see you again."
"I've been thinking a lot."
= "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."
"I think we should just be friends."
= "You're ugly."
"I've learned a lot from you."
= "Next!!!!"
"I'm on a long distance call, can you call me later?"
= "I gotta turn on my answering machine."
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