“You're scared... so I'm paying for it with my heart.”
I feel like I've tried for so long to be happy, and the more I try, the more that goal slips from my reach. It's almost like quicksand where the more you struggle, the more submerged you become. I've given up on everything. Nothing matters to me anymore. Especially myself. The part of my life that matters least to me is myself. Because I'm no one… and I always have been."
"It's okay. I mean, no, obviously it's not okay, but it's how it is. We've had the chance to say that about a lot of things for a long time now, haven't we? It's not okay, it's just how it is." - Party of Five
"So tell me the truth. Does it ever get better? Or is this what I have to look forward to?" - Party of Five
"Look at me, you may think you see who I really am, but you'll never know me. Everyday it's as if I play a part. Now I see, if I wear a mask I can fool the world, but I cannot fool my heart." – Mulan
"Do you ever just get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody? you don’t want to smile, and you don't want to fake being happy. But at the same time, you don't know exactly what is wrong either. there isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand. if you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. people have stopped being comforting.. and being alone never was. at least when you're alone no one constantly asks you what is wrong and there isn't anyone who wont take 'I don't know' for an answer. you feel the way you do just BECAUSE. you hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait."
The pain grew stronger, thought I could bear But suicide is painless, just to compare... Would it be right, would it be fair? if I said I'd always be there...
She smiles with all she has left yet her tears are left undried, though she has so much to say she bottles it up inside. If you look past her broken eyes to a shadow no one sees, a disguise so you wont recognize That girl is really me
N0B0DY KNEW H0W MUCH SHE BLAMED HERSELF
Eventually All The Pieces Will Fall Into Place Until Then You Gotta Laugh At The Confusion Live For The Moment And Know That Everything Happens For A Reason
Feelings I used to have aren't there…..and for the first time in so long…I really don't care.
But things just get so crazy Living life gets hard to do Sunday morning rain is falling And I'm calling out to you Singing someday it will bring me back to you Find a way to bring myself back home to you...
"Every day seems the same to me; I sit around and think about how alone I feel, then I wind up rather enjoying loneliness because it's the comfort of being sad. Sometimes it feels so right and sometimes I'd like to be around no one for ten straight years but I know this feeling can't bring me places. And I know I'm losing lots of ground but to keep up means to get up. And why does it have to be the world keeps on changing while I just stay the same?"- Saves the Day
"Do you think it hurts much to die? It's hurting so much more to stay alive now." - From Autumn to Ashes
"No one thinks that I cry myself to sleep every night. No one knows that I'm not that strong. But maybe it's time for someone to find out that the person they know is not the real me." - Michelle Burns
"All my life, I have felt like there was some part of me missing and I felt that everyone could tell, like there was some hole in me, and everyone could see through it, like I wasn't finished or something." - Boy Meets World
"I pretend to be happy so I don't have to explain myself to people who'll never understand."
"Everybody, everything I've known, never taught me how to stand up on my own, had to learn it from the one who let me go, now I walk alone, yes I walk alone." –Oleander
"I don't ask for much. All I need is to know that someone will be here, that there is someone in this world I can count on. Is that really so much?" - Michelle Burns
"Everyone has issues except me. I have a damn subscription."
"i start to think there really is NO cure for depression, that happiness is an ongoing battle, and i wonder if it isn't one I'll have to fight for as long as i live, i wonder if its worth it."
"if you've ever been depressed, then maybe you know where I'm coming from. It’s like one minute you’re fine, and the next minute something happens that makes you think -- i mean really think -- and then you’re totally empty. the only thoughts that are in your head are negative and it makes you feel totally alone, like you don't mean anything to anyone. all you want to do is tell someone how you feel, but you don't want their pity, and even if you could tell someone, nothing would come out right. you don't want to laugh or smile, or whine, or argue, or even be stubborn or difficult, you just want to go to bed and cry and hope this feeling passes, and sometimes it does, but it always seems to come back. you think that all your friends hate you and only talk to you because they feel bad for you. you know complete strangers judge you just because of how you look and how you act, and when you think about how you’re not as beautiful as the crowd that surrounds you, it makes you feel even worse. and of the two people that are supposed to love you the most in the world, one left you, and the other has to scream at you sometimes because they get angry and upset too. you feel like you will probably search your whole life for that one person that you can totally trust that you can love forever, who will never ever hurt you, but you know somewhere deep down that you'll probably never find him. he probably doesn’t even exist, so you just give up, you want so desperately to be alone, but at the same time you fear it so much. you know how it feels to know that you’re a bad person, to let your friends down and always be selfish, isolated, self conscious, bitter, whiny, and obsessive. you listen to what everyone else has to say, but you never tell them how YOU feel, because that would mean revealing part of yourself, and you just can't do that; you can't let anyone really know you. and your opinion wouldn't matter to them anyway, and most of all if you took the time to sit down and try to get all your feelings out for the first time in your life, it would be completely overwhelming and if anyone ever listened to all of that, they would have to agree with you 100 percent."
"I’m sick of being dragged through the day.. i remember a time in my life when i used to wish the day would last forever... now all i want it to do is end.. each day i hate myself a little more.. i remember when i was my friend.…"
"Today I realized I have surpassed depression. I'm not even sad anymore. The way I'm feeling is not even a way of feeling now.. it has become a way of life. I would give anything just to be able to cry, to know I was capable of having emotions again... but instead I stand here.. numb... like a dead girl walking."
"i wish everyone didn't have such high expectations of me... because its bad enough i let myself down.. i don’t need to let everyone else down too.."
"Oh, yeah, yeah. If your definition of 'ok' is having the strong desire to draw a warm bath and slit your wrists, then I am peachy." - Dawson's Creek
"I’m fucking tired of pretending everything is okay, my tears are starting to show and my smile is fading away."
"Today. Today was a day. The world got smaller, darker. I grew more afraid. Not of what I am but of what... I could be. I loosen my collar to take a breath. My eyes fade. And I see... Him. The image of perfection. His frame strong. His lips smooth. And I keep thinking. What am I so scared of... I wish I could escape the pain, but these thoughts invade my head. Bound to my memory, they're like shackles of guilt. Oh God, please set me free…" - Dawson’s creek
"It's like, there's this person that you want to be for other people. To make them happy. To make them proud of you. And then there's yourself. And sometimes it's hard to tell where one ends and the other begins. Does that make any sense?" - dawson's creek
"Maybe my heart's too weak. There's just this feeling, thought I had to get going... got too scary, got too big, got to get out of here. But now I don't know how to get home." -Jewel
"How am I supposed to recover when I don't even know my disease?" -Girl Interrupted
"I would kill myself, but I'd probably go to hell, and that would just be redundant."
"You know, i don't think I’ll ever be happy. Wherever i am, I’ll always wish i'm someplace else. Whatever i have, I’ll always want something different." -dawson’s creek
"It was like falling into a hole and it keeps getting bigger and bigger, you can't get out. And then all of the sudden it's inside you, it is you, and you're trapped, and it's all over." -Ordinary People
"Every once in a while this unbelievable sadness comes over my heart and breaks it all over again ... not because of the way things are but the way things could have been."
'I always tell the girls never take it seriously. If you never take it seriously then you never get hurt. If you never get hurt then you always have fun'-Almost Famous
Picking up the pieces of a life you’ve broken Stitching it together with the seams wide open
"Sometimes you are falling so slowly that you don't notice it until you hit the ground."
"Never forget the hurt, never forget what they did to you, never forget your pain, lest you forget yourself. Let your wounds flow freely, your scars a testament to your defiance. Don't let them forget what happened. Hold your wounds up high, for all to see, let them see what has been done to you, and hope they can understand." - Veiled Thought Of The Day
"I flirt with suicide, sometimes to kill the pain." – Korn
Driven to the margin of error driven to the edge of control driven to the margin of terror driven to the edge of a deep dark hole. It's my turn to drive." - Rush
It's good to know that if I behave strangely enough, society will take full responsibility for me." -Ashleigh Brilliant
"Escape reality with new pain, then let the circus start again." - Silverchair
"Woke up the other day, the pain won't go away, I am going, in a peculiar way..." - This Time The Verve
"Dreams are bad, when all they do is leave the truth behind..." - Silverchair
"One day we'll come crashing down... what will I do? Never had a chance to say goodbye... close my eyes and hope that it's a real smooth flight this time..." - A320 Foo Fighters
"It's better to burn out than to fade away."
"They don't have meetings about RAINBOWS." - 6th Sense
"There must be a hell of a lot of people in the world like me, who want to die but haven't got the guts." - Conte Vittorie Alfieri
"It's good to know that I'm not the only one who gives stupid excuses for having scars. At least we're not the ones believing them and doing nothing."
"How can you hide from what never goes away?"
"But I was still alive, and in my book, where there's life, there's hope." - Bryce Courtenay
"Some say love, it is a razor,That leaves your soul to bleed. - Bette Midler
"When things get unbearable, I wrap myself into a tight ball and shut my eyes. Every muscle in my body is tense. I open my eyes and I'm still where I was when I closed them to escape. Nothing's changed."
"We long for healing, but the scars never leave." -Collective Soul
"Yes, I'm perfectly mentally unstable thank you..."
"I'm a winter girl; I like coming out when things are desolate and everybody's ready to slit their wrists." -Tori Amos
"We're afraid to live, and afraid to die."
"Sometimes it's like someone took a knife, baby edgy & dull and cut a six-inch valley through the middle of my soul." - Bruce Springsteen
"Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm."
"Got a little red line that tells you, boy, where the razor's been." - Tori Amos
"That's when I reach for my revolver... think twice and put it back."
"Sometimes mental illness can be contagious, you know."
"Can't anyone see the warning signs? Why do they think we read books about anorexia and self mutilation? We want to know how long we can go without eating or how thin we can get before we starve to death. We want to know how deep we can cut before we bleed to death. Most of all, deep inside, we want to get caught. We may not admit it to ourselves, but we really do want to get caught."
I don't want to die. I just don't care enough to run. - Dawson's Creek
"It releases me from pain and strife, and I find happiness with my life, If only for an instant, I am real, The numbness inside starts to feel. “
Suicide is not choosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain
"I opened my heart to you. I can't just stand around like a fool, waiting for you to be ready " -Boy Meets World
It all brought up such bad memories, I mean who am I trying to kid, you know? A clean break is easier, you can reset it and it heals and you move on, but if you leave things messy, or things don't get put right then it just hurts.. forever. It's really time for me to move away from him.. from all of this.
People say what's the point in liking someone who doesn't like you back, and they are right, there is no point. But you can't help who you like, it's not up to you, your heart just kinda decides for you…. And there's no turning back once your heart makes up its mind…
"I drew the blade across my wrist to see how it would feel. I looked into the future, there was nothing to reveal." -Goo Goo Dolls
"Don't let the world bring you down, not everyone here is that fucked up and cold, remember why you came and while your alive, experience the warmth before you grow cold" - Incubus
"You wanna hear about my new obsession I'm ridin' high upon a deep depression I'm only happy when it rains" - Garbage
Theres not much left to love. Too tired today to hate. I feel the empty. I feel the minute of decay." -Marilyn Manson
What I want back is what I was
"I hurt myself today To see if I still feel I focus on the pain The only thing that's real The needle tears a hole The old familiar sting Try to kill it all away But I remember everything"
"From childhood's hour I have not been As others were; I have not seen As others saw; I could not bring My passions from a common spring. From the same source I have not taken My sorrow; I could not awaken My heart to joy at the same tone; And all I loved, I loved alone." -Edgar Allen Poe
Courage doesn't always roar. sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow.’
"I need someone to ease my mind - but sometimes a someone is so hard to find." -Smashing Pumpkins
"I'm living but I'm feeling numb. Can see it in my stare. I wear a mask so falsely numb and I don't know who I am."
"There comes a time when you look into the mirror and realize that what you see is all that you will ever be. Then you accept it, or you kill yourself. Or you stop looking into mirrors."
"When will people understand that words can cut as sharply as any blade, and that those cuts leave scars upon our souls."
And with tears of blood he cleansed the hand, The hand that held the steel: For only blood can wipe out blood, And only tears can heal." -Oscar Wilde
"You don't even have to hate to have a perfectly miserable time."
"If you take someone's thoughts and feelings away, bit by bit, consistently, they then have nothing left except some gritty, gnawing, shitty little instinct, down there, somewhere, worming around in the gut, but so far down, so hidden, it's impossible to find."
"These precious things, let them bleed, let them wash away. These precious things, let them break their hold on me."
"Wherever you are, you will carry always the truth of your scars... you have no right to calm me down, you were never that around."
"We are made to bleed, and scab and heal and bleed again, and turn every scar into a joke. We are made to fight, and fuck and talk and fight again, and sit around and laugh until we choke."
"Twisted thoughts that spin round my head. I'm spinning, oh, I'm spinning. How quick the sun can drop away, and now my bitter hands cradle broken glass of what was everything. All the pictures had all been washed in black, tattooed everything..."
"Pink ribbon scars that never forget. I tried so hard to change these regrets.”
And all the feelings I thought were gone Came rushing back to me at once Tried to smile and hide the way I felt But I was thinking to myself
Truth is I never got over you Truth is wish I was standing in her shoes Truth is when it's all said and done I'm still I love with you Truth is I never should have let you go Truth is it's killing me cause, now I know Truth is when it's all said and done Yes I'm still In love with you
