November 3, 2002
Funeral parlors are not the most comforting of places. Getting together with friends I've been apart from for over a year is also not too cozy. Seeing these friends at the funeral parlor's just adds to the uncomfortableness. Seeing the man lying in the coffin - a 51-year-old man, with no health problems up until his untimely death, and the many people coming to give their support to the widow, her 20 something daughter and her 20 year old son, just makes my heart break. Reading the thoughts of that 20-year-old son also brings tears to the eyes: October 30, 2002 - I've been in a dream like state for the past 2 days, and I'm just waiting to wake up, and he'll be there, and he'll have his head hung over my sholder as I'm fixing up my car, and he'll be laughing at me with the neighbor as I make inocent mistakes, and he'll poke his head under the hood once more to correct me, and he'll be laughing, and he'll be. Pondered @ 7:51 PM Admiting the weaknesses that our parents hold is difficult to do. Seeing their weakness is more so, but by that time we are able to predict it. A 51-year-old man with a fairly young family and an active life and parents that have to witness his body being lowered into the ground definately has no time to prepare his loved ones for the inevitable demise of his body and mind. This past weekend I've been thinking about the state of my parents, and how vunerable they are, just like that poor man who is now resting peacefully somewhere up north where he grew up once upon a time. I've been thinking about the family of that man, and how I wish I was closer so I could offer a shoulder to cry on, ears to listen, and hands to hold him, and offer some tissues. But I'm not that close ... unfortunately I never really was, and I regret that. I truly miss that. My only comfort is that this might be seen and he will know that I care enough to shed some tears for him and wish him and his family well.
November 7, 2002
Playing the drinking game "I Never" with a long lost friend via MSN Messenger, while only one of was actually drinking none the less, brings a whole new twist to "I Never".
November 16, 2002
Well, I've been so busy lately working on my webpage ... but it hasn't been obvious now has it? I've been working hours on a Web Evaluation for my Digital Communications class - it's so much fun to work on, but very time consuming. Today was our Christmas Bazaar - it seems we did okay, and I had a good time. I was on the lookout for a certain somebody, but I guess it's just not meant to be. Maybe it's better to have a no-show, I have no idea how it would've been accepted by the others. I had to blow off my friends tonight in order to work on my web eval that's due on Monday. Here's hoping I get it all done, and this night is not in vain. I've only got 5 more points to address, and it's not quite 7:30PM yet - I DO have a chance. ;-) On the plus side - next weekend I'll be sure to be up for something during the weekend ... the only problem is that the something I have in mind is probably not what's expected of me. I hope it goes okay.
November 25, 2002
I'm heading into the home stretch ... school is almost over ... only to start again in the beginning of January. But I'm so close... Had a pretty shitty experience during an amazing Grey Cup Party at my house ... of all the days to get the 24hr flu it had to hit me on Grey Cup Sunday ... RRRR!!! I missed out on all the fun, the excitment, and all the good food (since all I was able to consume all day was 2 cans of 7Up) ;-( I was so dissaponted - but to cheer up my spirits - going to a hockey game tomorrow night, and I'm definately oing to the Grey Cup Champs Parade on Wed - that's my time to shine - and celebrate like there's no tomorrow. That's right, I'm making up for my shitty state on Sunday. Here's a thoughtful moment for you all to ponder : Sometimes
November 30, 2002
Well I've recovered from the 24hr flu dammit ... only to get well enough to finish off the semester. I guess that's a good thing. I've only got a quiz, a final project, and a final exam left and then I'm done. At least until I have to start my bookreport that's due when I get back ;-( Not to mention the complete clean up I have to do in the spare room and my own room - after franrtically searching for something specific last night I realized just how messy it actually is and how frustrating it really and truly is .... ;-(