These are more of my poems and songs! One thing: I know a couplea lines are from fuel songs, but some of their lines just express what I want to say, and how I feel so good that I can't put it into better words. Plus, alot of their songs are more than just music to me, they are a philosophy that helps me get through tough times...ALSO: yes their are a couple of songs that make reference to Brett, Carl, Jeff, and Kevin..If you can find' em fine..I ain't pointing them out, and just because one line in it refers to one of them desn't mean the whole poem or song is about them, so please keep an open mind!! OKAY..read on..
24
Eye
Deep blue
and white
grips my soul
like no force
ever will
desire
takes hold
changing
sanity
consumes all thought
all sense of
reasoning
its a
lie
knowledge of
a human life
tells me
but my heart
brainwashed
with a want
more powerful
than earth
water
fire
and air
won't relinqish
its hold
controling
every move
focusing on
the one thing
that should
be
mine
but never will
never..neverland
I always thought
when it happened
it would be....
but my voice
calling
ohgodohgodohgod
her scream
the smell of strawberry
fields? Ironic
and no time to think
but I did...
god let her live
family
I took for granted
never told them
never loved him
never cradled
part of me
in my arms
never flew
never traveled
never knew
the man he always told
or spoke to the wind
and really listened
never took responsibility
never had that castle
he always told me
Will they miss me
will she even remember
me when she's a woman?
will she cry
will boy hate
himself for
what he’s done
will anyone realize it
before my head
connects with
clear blue sky
felt the impact
with body
mind and soul
will she cry
will he cry
will she cry
will he cry
will she cry
will he cry
will she cry?
dirt flies in the air
and little pieces
of sky
will she cry?
will they all be sorry?
will they wish it
on them?
when I die
wanted to say
how sorry I am
never wanted it to be like..
i always wondered
what I'd do if...
now I'll never have to see
I swear my
neck broke in two
and I felt the
pain in a split se..
will she cry
will he cry?
I’m alive.....
Cage of Life
Locked in
My little box
Dragons pounding
On the top
Rays of gold
Attempt to slip through
The cracks
Trying to let in a little
Light
My ego
Imprisons me
My inhibitions
And my fears
Head throbs
Heart detonates
Scattering
Pieces of my soul
And everything
All over the violet carpet
Each crumb
Meaningless in itself
But the bread is
My life
Rays reflect
Too bright now
My eyes close
Curl up in my box
And let the
dragons
Beat me to
Sleep
WHY
Once I thought
sky was an ocean
I swore if I didn't
hold on tight enough
I'd fall, drift into
the baby blue breath
of a cloudy spirit
Maybe it still is a sea
But why do I feel
Like I belong in water
Breathing in the silky
sand of god
flying into a pearl
of gold
skin of bare bodies
pressed against
the salty flesh of
the earth's tears
why do I need
to swim like
a tiny silver streak
why does my blood
run cold through
the life they think
they own
I don't wanna hold
on anymore
I need to fall
away from the dirt below me
and see if all the
dreams I used to
believe when I
was innocent
are really there
or ever were really mine
to hold
if the ocean doesn't want
me or if it was
my naive mind
there has to be something
better than the pool of
tears I am swimming
in down here..
HE
harsh words
from a superficial asshole
he was supposed to be a friend
do you really wanna hit me
you really don't know what you're doing
I told him a razor would fix it
he said no (hypocrite)
he plays a song
not for me but it's hopeful
if he fell I'd go too
if he held me I'd feel loved
if he held me i'd feel safe
if he held me i'd feel alive..
he held me I was perfect
if I dreamed it let me die
If he was an angel
for one night he was
my angel
he held me
I was perfect
FALL OF LIFE
mobs of
sweaty
guinea pigs
her face burns
ribs
crushed between
other bones
the light from
above shines
on the goal
one word
was all it took
to send her flying
hands caress
and mutalate
her body
but the thrill
is too great
to give up
and the passion
under the lights
beckons her soul
to fly higher
she prayed
to the slaves
below her
to the god above
to let her
be one with
the melody
her eyes
seek
dark blue gems
the light refracts
off them
shooting the
harmony straight
into her rapidly
beating heart
extacy was achieved
for one moment
she was THE god
20 hands and
jealousy
her head plunged
toward the cold
hard cement
the smell of
beer and waste
stung her nose
her faith and
heart broken
and her head crushed
lying in a pool of
red despair
are you okay above
the agony
swept over her
and the light
faded away
into an empty
nothing...
(Anyone tell that was bout crowd surfing??!)
Far Away
Engulfed by
a tide
slowly yet surely
anguish comes for
another soul
lost, hope thrown
in the trash
smashed to thousands
of tiny pieces
and stepped on
the ticking sends
chills down a twisted spine
as I watch my
passage to the heavens
close
helpless to change
the way it will be
I knew it all along
but clung to
a barely there
piece of silken thread
darkness spills over
the last grain hits
with the force of
ten thousand bolts of lightening
sending earth shattering
spasms through
my enslaved body
rain falls..
a fog seeps
into my brain..
numbed and defeated
I stumble
though familiar routines
awaiting
the moon
the sun
and the
ending
of all that
really matters...
OZONE layer
(i know the title isn't very original!)
Stupid people
not in their minds
maybe they never are
still I sit
mock me
it is your god given right
security is not a friend
blocking the gate to heaven
locking away the fuel to my desire
I can still see the sparkles on
those pants
still feel his breath on my neck
to say just one word
consoles me now
but I know it would never be enough
take me away
I know I could use
the rest
A lone cigarette butt on the grass
near the legs thatprevent my encounter
one more seat closer
there is no one there
halted
by and ego the size of the sun
won't give in no matter what
we freeze my hands burn
against the yellow jacket
in isolation from the world
we wait for
whatever dreams may come
leather and spikes
on vunerable has-beens
don't even know who they are
everything's trying to drag me down
but I'll rip the sky from the ground
disrespect oozes from the open pores
of the masses
standing once and only once
makes him realize the truth
pours his bottled rain all over us
it feels like sunshine
kissing my face
with these words, dear angel
it's time to go
doubt truth to be a liar
but never doubt I love
and I'll remember
SUNBURNED
I see him
like a vision
white blonde hair
shimmers like the stars
voice
flows like
the water surrounding
him
my hand
grasps toward
his perfect form
his voice sings me
a bittersweet song
it is untitled
but something in the way
the melody floats
right to my body tells me
it is a song for you
He reaches out
take my hand
I will never hurt you
both strive
just a little further
his fingertips touch mine
Angel, please don't leave me
the time is up
my angel gazes in to my eyes
and smiles as if to tell me
he knows
I love you
the words won't push past my lips
the air is foreign to them
all in black
he still looks
I want to hold him
for eternity
or longer
his dark blue eyes blend
with the sea
and they become one
If only I had reached
just a little further
If only I had taken
my angel's hand....
desolation sets in
and I wake from my
dream.
USED
I love you
now may I please take your heart
and mutalte it and crush it into four hundred and twenty pieces
I really do care
give me your hand
do you mind if I scar and burn it with this cigarette
I would never hurt you
trust me -$
can I eat every last bit of emotion from your already broken heart.
You can't judge one from what another has done
I won't break it
I promise
I love you..
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