THE PICKLE SLICER

    Bill worked in a pickle factory. He had been employed there for a number
of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a
  terrible compulsion. He had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle
  slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk
  about it, but Bill indicated that he'd be too embarrassed. He vowed to
  overcome the compulsion on his own. One day a few weeks later, Bill came
  home absolutely ashen. His wife could see at once that something was
  seriously wrong.
  "What's wrong, Bill?" she asked.
  "Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my
  penis into the pickle slicer?"
  "Oh, Bill, you didn't."
  "Yes, I did."
  "My God, Bill, what happened?"
  "I got fired."
  "No, Bill. I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?"
  "Oh...she got fired too."