Shooting Tigers
Mood:  don't ask
Why do I end up with all the strange phone calls? This morning I got a call from a lady and at first I wasn't sure if it was real or if I was being pranked. Below is our conversation. When reading the part of LADY image a REALLY thick Hispanic Accent.

ME: This is Rebecca, can I help you?
LADY: Yes…ummm...hello?
ME: Hello? Can I help you?
LADY: Yes…ummm…my English no so good. Ummm I don’t know how you say…..my husband wants to shoot the tigers. Where he do that?
ME: (very puzzled) He wants to shoot the tigers?
LADY: Yes the tigers…where he do that? Off 98 many people fishing…he shoot tigers there? You know I mean?
ME: Ma’am I am sorry but we don’t have any tigers.
LADY: Yes off 98…he shoot tigers….you know I mean?
ME: (repeat louder) Ma’am we don’t have tigers at Falls Lake.
LADY: Oh…..no?.....maybe is not right word? He shoot little paper he stick to the trees.
ME: Oh you mean a TARGET.
LADY: Yes…he do that off 98?
ME: No Ma’am we don’t allow target shooting at Falls. He will have to find a firing ranger.
LADY: He do that off 98?
ME: No Ma’am he will have to go to a shooting range. We don’t offer places for target practice. He can hunt here but he can’t shoot at targets.
LADY: No he no hunt… just shoot. He do that off 98?
ME: (getting frustrated now) No your husband will have to go to a firing range.
LADY: Oh…… you have number?
ME: No sorry I don’t have a number but I am sure you can find it online or the phone book.
LADY: I call you…your number on the sign.
ME: Yes ma’am it is on the sign but we do not offering target shoot here your husband will have to go to a firing range.
LADY: Oh….a what?…you spell please?
ME: F…I…R…I…N…G
LADY: F…I…R…I…N…D
ME: No G
LADY: D
ME: No G as in Grape
LADY: P
ME: No G…F…I…R…I…N…G..........G
LADY: Oh G
ME: Yes G.
LADY: You have number?
ME: No you will have to find that information.
LADY: Oh…..firing?
ME: Range
LADY: Eh?
ME: Range….R…A…N…G…E
LADY: R…A…N…D…E…
ME: No D….G
LADY: R…A…N…D…G…E
ME: No there is no D in it. Replace D with G.
LADY: You have number I can call?
ME: *sigh* No I am sorry you will have to get that number on your own. I don’t know of any local firing ranges.
LADY: oh…(hangs up phone).


I felt like was part of that "who's on first" routine that the 3 Stooges used to do. Oh I love my job!!!! The one thing that worries me is that we might have some non-english people out there shooting guns. If they can't speak english they certainly can't read signs. *sigh* What's next?