Getting Settled

After lunch, Case and the guys took AJ out to the courtyard to show him around. He showed AJ who everyone was and what they were known for.

“See that shady lookin’ dude over there? That’s Q. He can get you anything from the outside for cigarettes. But don’t make friends with him, cause you can’t trust that bastard. And over there... see him... with the tat around his wrist... don’t ever get caught alone with him and his crew. They’ll make you a bitch before you even get settled around here. They the main reason why I’m lettin’ you hang with us. I hate to see a man go down like that. It’s sad.” They kept on walking and AJ was thankful. He sure as hell didn’t wanna leave prison a sodomized man. They sat down on a bench near a basketball court and some of the guys started up a game with other guys already playing. Those who remained seated on the bench lit up cigarettes. Johns offered AJ one but he declined. He had promised Reneé that he would never smoke another cigarette again. And just because she wasn’t there to watch him, he wasn’t gonna back down on her.

“So what’s the deal with that fool you cell with?” Greene asked, while exhaling a white puff of smoke.

“Mike? I don’t know what the hell’s wrong with that kid.” AJ answered. They all looked over in his direction. He was standing alone by the doorway. Still wearing his long-john shirt to cover the hate messages etched in his skin. Scared and uncertain. Case shook his head in pity.

“He think he doing somethin’ with that tight ass shirt. What’s he gonna do when his ass gets thrown in a group shower?” Greene joked, and they all laughed. Case nudged AJ on the arm.

“You got a female outside?” He asked. AJ couldn’t help but smile. And he lowered his head.

“Yeah. Her name’s Reneé. We’re engaged.” AJ reached into his pocket and pulled out her picture. The CO’s allowed him to have that even though his wallet and the rest of his street clothes were in their care.

“Damn! You fittin' to marry her?!?!” Case exclaimed, then he passed the picture down to Fields. Fields took one look at Reneé and slipped the picture in his shirt.

“I’m gonna need this for tonight. Thanks, man.” He said, reaching over Case and slapping AJ’s knee. AJ got up and held out his hand.

“Nah, dude. That’s not funny. Give it back.” Fields started laughing and gave the picture back without hesitation.

“You got that beautiful female at home? Why the hell did you get yourself locked up in here?” Johns’ asked, having seen the picture over Field’s shoulder.

“I know this is gonna sound cliché... but I’m innocent of what they accused me of.” AJ stopped smiling and put his love’s picture back in his chest pocket.

“Aight... what’d they accuse you of?” Case asked, in a voice that said he knew AJ was guilty regardless.

“This girl said I raped her when I wouldn’t give her the attention she wanted. And the fact that’s she pregnant with my kid and she was 16 at the time doesn’t help my case. Crazy ass groupies get ya every time.” AJ told them. Case held his hand up and closed his eyes, running over AJ’s brief story in his head.

"Ok, McLean, ok. You’re telling me you have groupies? What the hell are you? Some kind of rock star or something?” John’s got up and looked AJ over.

“Oh yeah! I read about you in the paper! You from that damn boyband. My niece is nuts over you guys. Damn... that was you!” AJ gave them a half smile, not sure of whether he should be flattered or ashamed of his profession.

“So, this groupie got pregnant with your kid. And because you didn’t wanna have anything to do with her, she cried rape?” Case said, summing things up for his own convenience.

“Right. And the thing is, all she gave me was head. She had to have gotten pregnant some other way. Cause I sure as hell didn’t fuck her. Like you said, I have Reneé. Why would I want a kid?” Fields stood now too and looked at AJ as well.

“Damn, dude. You’re knee deep in shit. Thought you was getting some guilt-free head and ended up in prison! I’m sorry man, but that’s funny.” Fields kept laughing until Case hit him on the back of the head with a rolled up music magazine.

“So, if you didn’t rape the bitch? Why are you here? I mean, can’t they investigate to find out how she really knocked herself up?” Greene asked, not quite understanding how she got away with it.

“They can’t prove it beyond a reasonable doubt. There’s no proof. If I were a juror, I’d probably doubt me too.” AJ was saddened by the fact that he was now an innocent felon.

On the way back to their cells, Case advised AJ about one thing.

“Don’t listen to that crazy white boy in your cell. And don’t get mixed in with the wrong crowds. Stick with us. We’re neutral. We stay out of trouble. I’m saying this to you because I do believe you about being innocent. At first, I didn’t. Because everybody says that. But you don’t seem like the type to lie. If you stick with us, you keep your head above water, and you have better chances of getting the fuck out of this place.” Then Case walked ahead to his cell. One that he shared with Fields.

AJ stopped at his cell, and the CO’s started a roll call. He waited for the person next to him to call his number. And he had to quickly glance down at his shirt to see his own number.

“81976" AJ called out, and on went the roll call. After it was finished, he went into his cell with Mike behind him. He took no time in climbing into his bunk bed and bringing the blanket up to his ears. He hated the smell of the place. He missed the clean smell of the sheets on his bed. He missed his pillows. He missed the soft hum of the ceiling fan above the bed. He missed the lulling sound of the waves on the beach outside. He missed spooning with Reneé. Her on the left side of the bed, him on the right.

Now he was here. Lying on an old, thin mattress. Lying under mildewy sheets. Lying under an obnoxious punk who had the nerve to be racist when he probably had more minorities in his family ancestry than any other white prisoner there. He wanted to be home.

“McLean?” Mike whispered from above. AJ opened his eyes and looked up. Mike was looking over the edge of the bed at him.

“Are you scared?” Mike asked.

“Go to sleep.” AJ said, closing his eyes again.

“Seriously, are you scared? I am. Before I got here, I was so sure that I was the man. That I was fearless, you know? Now, in here, I don’t fit in. I feel alone. I feel scared.” AJ could relate to everything Mike was saying. Every single word.

“Why are you telling me this?” AJ asked. Opening his eyes again.

“Because no one else will listen. I mean, we have counselors and shit. But, they don’t know what it’s like.” Mike didn’t feel like he had anything more to say so he turned over and settled back into his bed.

“Mike?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m scared too.”

~*~*~*~*~*~


It was around noon the next day when a CO came up to AJ and told him that he had a visitor. AJ hoped it would be Reneé. He didn’t wanna see anyone else right then. And the minute he saw her sitting at that visitor’s table, he felt complete again. She jumped up from her seat, nearly knocking the chair over. And she wrapped her arms around him.

“Oh God...” Was all she could say before she started crying. Then she pulled away just enough so that they could kiss.

“I love you so much baby! I do!” She said to him, between sorrowful sobs and kisses. AJ noticed the CO looking at them, so he suggested that they sit down before he got into trouble. She complied.

“Um, your mother really wanted to come, but she’s scared. However, she did say to call her tonight if you could. And she’ll try to come tomorrow.” Reneé explained. AJ understood all of this. His mother probably couldn’t bear to see her one and only son in prison and unhappy. And she knew that if Reneé went first, she could be told how bad it really was in there.

“And how are the guys?” AJ asked, leaning closer to her over the table. She held his hand and smiled.

“They all send their love and support. And they’ve got Kent as well as all his associates pushing for an appeal. Sweetie, we will find a way to get you back home.” She reached up and touched his face.

“I hate what that bitch has done to you.” She whispered, and AJ squeezed her hand even more, agreeing totally.

“Don’t think about her now. You’re here and I’m happy.” He said with a smile.

“How are they treating you in here? Is it as bad as I think it is?” AJ nodded yes. And he looked around at the prisoners with visitors too.

“But it’s ok. There are these guys who’ve been pretty cool. At least I’m not alone.” The CO tapped Reneé on her shoulder and told her that it was time to leave. She stood up and put her purse on her shoulder. Then AJ stood up to hug her again.

“You take care of yourself. And I promise, we will all visit as much as possible, baby.” They kissed again and she turned to leave. AJ could see, even from behind, that she was wiping the tears from her eyes.

He was about to go back to his cell block when he saw Case and the guys downstairs playing cards. He had nothing better to do, so he went down to join them. Armstrong wasn’t playing so he sat next to him and watched.

“So, your girl came to visit you?” Armstrong asked. AJ got a cheesy grin on his face.

“Yeah, that was her. Just as sexy as the day I met her.” Armstrong nodded.

“I had a girlfriend before I got locked up in here. Her name was Jessica. But she’s probably seeing somebody else by now. I mean, she stopped writing and she stopped visiting. I guess it ain’t easy for her being alone all the time, waiting for my sorry ass. I swear, man, if I could go back in time, I would have done right. Just for her.” This made AJ think. He could seriously be hurting Reneé by being locked up. And he got scared. What if she did give up on him down the road? He didn’t think his heart would be able to take losing her.

Something had to be done! The longer he stayed in jail, the larger the risk of Reneé up and leaving him. Carrie already took away his freedom and dignity. She was not gonna take away his future-wife too.


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