Song: Your My Angel
Artists: Brooks & Dunn
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
You're my Angel
You see me through
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I sat on my bed crying, thinking about what had happened. They were only 16, my age. I mean it could have been me, in fact I was supposed to go to the mall with them. 3 of my good friends had gotten into a horrible car accident, none of them survived. I hadn't left my room since the accident and that was 4 days ago. I continued dwelling in the memories of all the times I had shared with them until I heard a knock on my bedroom door.
"Come in" I sobbed.
"Hey KC, how are you doing?" It was my best friend Brian. I ran over to him and threw my arms around him, he returned the hug and rubbed my back in comfort.
"Brian, it should have been me. I should have been in that car. I deserved to die more than them, I don't even want to try to live without them".
"Please don't say that, nobody deserves that, especially you. If it was you who would I play basketball with, who would yell at me like my mother everytime I did something stupid, who would take care of me when I break up with my girlfriends? You don't WANT to live without them, but I CAN'T live without you." he said puttin his hands on my shoulders.
"I can't live without you either". I never thought that I would have someone like him in my life, someone who was always there for me.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Believe in me, I believe in you
Oh fill my heart from your loving well
You're my angel
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~A year later~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"You have that musical to perform in for drama next week don't you?" Brian asked me on the phone.
"Yeah, I am so nervous".
"You shouldn't be, you'll be great. I mean I have practicing with you for three weeks and you never miss a note or a line. I'm just mad that I won't be there to see you blow everyone away with your performance. Oh and I want to say Good Luck now just in case I forget."
"Good Luck to you too, as if you really need it though, you know you have a great voice. All the guys in the group will be jealous once they hear you." I said to Brian trying to give him a little bit of confidence. He was flying out to Orlando to try out for a group that his cousin Kevin is in.
"I hope so, I mean this could be my only chance for a successful career in music, my only chance." he said with hope in his voice.
"You be fine, I just can't believe you are leaving me, I'm going to miss you so much" I knew he could hear my sadness.
"I'm gonna miss you too, but I'll only be gone for three weeks." He tried to lighten the mood.
"Do you realize that we have never been apart for more that 3 days ever since the day we met. I can't handle 3 months. Well I guess I should let you go, it is getting late and you have to finish packing".
"Ok, bye babe" We were only friends but he always called me babe, and he was hun.
"Bye Hun"
The next day Brian left for Florida and the minute he left, I already missed him. Two weeks went by and just like Brian said I blew the crowd away with my musical performance, he always had faith in me no matter how bad i thought i would do.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Pick me up when I'm feeling down
When I stumble on shaky ground
Oh your my answer when I can't tell
You're my Angel
Oh you take me up to heaven
When you spread your loving wings.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~3 years later~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I was once again sitting in my room crying when there was a knock at my door. I didn't answer just sobbed harder. The door swung open and a man rushed over to me and wrapped his arms around me.
"Whats wrong Babe, why are you crying, what happened?"
"Oh my, Brian you're home!!" I cried out still not looking at him.
"Yes, I'm here now tell me whats wrong!" I hadn't seen him in three years, just photos that he sent me. He never got to come home after that 3 months, he had to fly to Europe, where his group the Backstreet Boys were going to tour, the were a big success. He had changed so much since we were younger, he wasn't the skinny little boy from down the street any more. He was Brian Thomas Littrell, and was now a handsome man. He put his finger under my chin and raised my head. A gasp escaped his mouth as he looked at my bruised face.
"What the ..... Who did this." he asked.
"My ex-boyfriend" I managed to say through my tears.
"What happened please tell me". I sucked in the tears and started to explain to him.
"W-we had been going out for almost a year" I paused and he rubbed my back in comfort. I let out a sigh of relief, I was soo happy he was back. "He was so sweet to me, until he found out that I was pregnant. He told me he didn't want to have a kid and to get an abortion. I refused to give up the child and he got mad and started hitting me, he punched me in the face and knocked me on the floor, th-then" I couldn't say anything I just started crying again.
"Then what?" Brian asked with pure rage in his voice. I had never heard that kind of hatred come from him before.
"Then he kept hitting me and hitting me in the stomach. After he finally left I managed to drive to the hospital, I told them that I was attacked on the street. The doctor told me that I was going to be ok, but-bbut the baby was k-kille-d".
"Oh my God, I am so sorry" he had tears in his own eyes."Why didn't you tell them what really happened?"
"He said he would kill me if I told. Brian... I don't know what I am going to do." He hugged me so tight I could barely breath, but didn't tell him, I never wanted him to let go. I felt so safe.
"I know exactly what you are going to do, My group is touring the U.S. this summer and you are coming with me. I am not leaving you here alone".
"You always have a way of making me feel so much better, I am so glad you are home"
"Me too" he said still holding me. I was in heaven in his arms' I was safe.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
When I am weary and way behind
When I am clearly out of my mind
Oh when I find that I am in my Hell
You're my Angel
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~That summer on Tour~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I sat crying, this time not in my bedroom though. I was in the back room on the Backstreet Boys tour bus. Once again Brian tried to come to my rescue, but this time the door was locked. I wasn't letting him stop me. I didn't want to live anymore. "I can't handle this life anymore, I can't let anything happen to you guys" I yelled and placed the cold blade of a knife to my left wrist. I began thinking of all the times I spent with Brian as a kid, and with Kev, Nick, and Howie during this tour, or the nights I had stayed up all night talking to AJ. But then thought of all the people I had lost My Parents when I was only 4, My friends as a teenager, My baby...everyone that I loved and cared for...Dead. I wasn't going to let my bad luck with loved ones hurt the guys, I loved them too much. I had to end the death with my own.
"Nnnoooooo KC" There was a loud bang as Brian and AJ tried to kick down the door.
"Stop, just stop, I can't let any thing happen to you guys, I can't handle losing anyone else. Just leave me alone. Soon all five of them were yelling for me to open the door. They continued kicking at the door as I finally dug the knife into my flesh and dragged it down across the veins. I don't know what happened all I know is that suddenly Brian was hugging me, Aj had ripped his shirt of and wrapped it around my wrist tightly, Kevin was holding the knife and I was in my bunk.
"Why, why?" thats all Brian could say he was crying and so was Nick and AJ. I didn' shed any tears, I just sat there in a daze. "Babe" Brian said finally calming down, "BABE" he yelled louder bringing me out of my stare. I looked over at his with a questioning look. "I guess this is the best time to do it" Brian said aloud then looked to me. "We have been friends for a long time right?" he asked and I nodded stiffly. "You know I love you? right? And I think you love me".
"I do love you" I whispered hoarsly. All the guys were just standing there, they had no idea what Brian was talking about.
"Now I do realize that we have only been friends in the past and nothing more, but" he stopped and took something out of his pocket, got down on his knee and looked me in the eye. "KC, I know this is kind of sudden, but all I know is that I love you with all of my heart and soul, I am only happy when I am with you and I want to know if you will be my wife" he asked proudly. Now I don't know how I was able to answer because everything went black, but i did.
"Brian I love you too, yes I will marry you".
I was sitting in my 'bedroom' crying, with Brian holding me. But this time I was crying tears of joy. I was with all the people I loved, My FIANCE and my 4 best friends and for the first time I was happy to be alive.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Oh You're my ANGEL.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~