He loved her. He really did. She knew he did. She wasn’t something he took for granted. The days apart were hard on her. They were hard on him too; hell, they were worse for him. Days spent in endless cities, venues and sound checks. Nights spent on the bus, as he looked out a lonely window the scenery changing before his eyes. But it wasn’t really different was it? The cities, the venues, the fans, the hotels they were really all the same weren’t they? But she, she was different.
He remembered the first time he’d seen her. Standing radiant and beautiful, angry and pissed off. And God bless the poor unsuspecting soul who’d been her target. He hadn’t seen it coming. Not the anger, nor the keys to her broken and wilting Honda that had coming flying, barely missing his head. And then she’d turned, just now noticing him, and apologized silently for the outburst. He’d forgiven her, of course, and had, hell, and would continued to do so for years to come. And then he’d made a mistake, a mistake he’d done everyday since, he looked directly into those sharp, uncaring, beautiful eyes. And somehow, in a world that he didn’t live in, they’d learned to love him too. Softened for him alone, sharp and deadly to others, but for him they held love.
It was a simple love. The kind that overlooked long, lonely nights spent apart. Didn’t see the millions of other girls that got more attention than her on a daily basis, never mind the fact that most of them weren’t of legal drinking age, let alone voting age. Didn’t acknowledge the public denial of her existence. Just simply loved him for who he was, not a super star, not a pop icon or 1/5 of the insanely popular “hit of the century” *NSYNC, but for Josh, and not JC. And for that he was grateful, more so than she’d ever know, and maybe even care to know.
She never asked why. Never questioned him when he didn’t come home on the day he said he would because the bus broke down. Never grilled him about that girl she’d seen him with on TV the day before. None of that mattered to her or to him. All that mattered was that he loved her and she loved him.
So now, as he sat on the edge of the same, but different, hotel bed he slept in almost every night for the past four years he watched her pace in front of him. Her voice was at a low, menacing level that would have made a pit bull turn around and whimper for its mom. Her slender hands balled into fists, and he knew the fresh set of nails was making an impression on her delicate skin. No, she never questioned, but she did yell. And he let her.
Let her yell until all the fury was gone and she would look at him and smile simply to say that she was done and please forgive her. Of course.
But tonight was different. There was something else in her eyes. He knew what it was, but chose not to acknowledge it. Or maybe was too scared to acknowledge it. Yes, that was it, and it was a frightening thought. It scared him more than anything ever had, because once it was done it was done and there was no going back. But then again, he’d bought the ring already so maybe it wasn’t that scary. Maybe he could do it; live in the world where her eyes held love for him and him alone. Make that world his and his alone. But, damn, that was forever and forever was a long time. Her eyes…God this was hard. Hell, he’d never done this before of course it was hard. To live in that world would change his life, alter it as nothing had before, not even being one of the most sought after pop stars. No, that would pale in comparison to this. And so he decided.
He stood, and this made her stumble a bit in her ranting. This wasn’t part of the script. He never stood until she was done, what the hell was he doing? With long, powerful strides he was to her in a split second. His lips crashing down onto hers passionately. Savoring the sweet, sweet taste that was her. She resisted at first, but then began to give in. She was finally getting what she wanted. He walked her over to the bed, never releasing her lips, and laid her down gently. Their clothes were gone in an instant and he was back on top of her. Making the mistake again of looking into her eyes and getting lost there for two blissful seconds before coming back to reality. She smiled up at him, running her fingertips lightly down his cheeks, reassuring him to get on with it damn it. He caught her hand, and slipped the ring on her finger and passed into her, gently, at the same time, with more finesse than it took them to get to that point. It didn’t get better than this. God, was this really his world? Yes, it was, finally.
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