The rain continued into the evening, so Jax decided to spend the night at Mrs. Sellers. It was getting late but he was still up, playing cards with her, laughing and smiling. He was so glad he stayed. It soon became obvious to him that she enjoyed having company, part of him almost wished he could stay here for a little longer-he knew what it was like to be lonely. Especially when your pride would never allow you to admit to such. People assumed then that you were okay with being alone, and they never gave you a second thought. Unless they wanted something. "What's wrong?" Mrs. Sellers asked as she dealt another hand. "Just thinking." She held up her cards. "So, are you seeing someone." Jax grinned. "Why Mrs. Sellers, are you making a pass at me?" "Oh heaven's no." she blushed. "Too bad." Jax continued to tease. "Listen here young man...I am way out of your...how do they say it...." "League? That's a given." "Stop it....and you never answered my question." "I was recently engaged." "Was?" "Was. She left town around six months ago." "Why?" "Better offer I guess." Jax stood, strecthing. "You miss her?" "I miss the idea of her, more than her." Jax admitted. "She wasn't the person for me to marry, I know that now...but at least I wasn't..." "Alone?" "Yes." "Well, you are a very handsome young man..." "Why thank you." he smiled. "I doubt you'll be alone for long." "Maybe." After a second his smile faded. "Though I've found the worst lonliness is being with someone, and still feeling alone. Yet, it happens with me all the time...then I met you." he winked. "Oh stop it." she blushed. When Jax awoke the next morning, it was already 9:30. He came out of the bedroom, wearing the flannel bottoms to Mrs. Sellers' deceased husband's pajamas. They were a little short he noted as he walked down the hall. He knocked on Keesha's door. "Keesha?" he said as he cautiously opened it. The room was empty, her bed made. "She's gone." Mrs. Sellers called from the bottom of the stairs. "Gone where?" "I don't know. She wasn't here when I got up." "Did she leave a note?" "No. She's just gone. I made you a breakfast, come eat, you are entirely too thin..." Jax watched as Mrs. Sellers walked away. He shook his head...how could Keesha do that...how could she just leave and not say goodbye to her. Or to him. He sighed deeply, but then put on a happy face as he went down the stairs to join Mrs. Sellers in breakfast. Jax stayed the day with Mrs. Sellers, not wanting to leave her alone. He came up with the excuse that he could help her do some things around the house, to pay her back for her hospitality. She graciously accepted. There were things that needed to be done. But more than that, she loved having Jax there. While Mrs. Sellers napped, Jax was in the attic, moving boxes and other items around to make more room. He wiped his hands on his jeans, sighing as his anger grew. He had hoped working would make him forget how selfish Keesha was. And how once again, stupid he must be to even start to like her in the first place. Jerry always said he was a sucker for a lovely smile, and that's exactly what he felt like now. A sucker. Keesha opened the door to the house, using her new crutches to get into the kitchen. She sat her tote bag full of groceries down and reached into her purse as the cab driver brought in another bag. She paid him, thanking him for the help and then started putting the items away. Jax's bike was still outisde, that meant that he was here somewhere she gathered. "You're back." "Hi." Keesha smiled at Mrs. Sellers. "I bought some groceries." "I thought you had gone." "Gone where?" she laughed as she tried to reach the top of the refrigerator. Mrs. Sellers came over and started to help. "I just took a cab to the town. I needed some crutches to help me get around. And then I went to the bank, went grocery shopping, and came back. It took so long, because I'm not in top position." "I just...I thought you had left...*left*." "I wouldn't leave without actually saying goodbye. Not after all you've done for me. That would be rather...bratty." she smiled softly as she thought of Jax. "Where's Jax?" "In the attic, I have him doing manual labor." she smiled. "That's good. He needs a purpose so he'll stop bugging me." Keesha giggled. Keesha made her way up the stairs, and was walking to her bedroom to take a nap. She paused leaning against the wall as she heard footsteps bounding down the stairs from the top level. Jax stopped, bending to tie his shoes...he stared at the leg in front of him. "Hi." Keesha said with a smile as she forced herself to stop staring at his bare back. Jax stood "What are you doing here?" "Gee...someone had a bad night. Is all that work making you cranky?" "At least you came back to say goodbye." he noted harshly. "Perhaps you're not as selfish as I thought." he started to move past her. "Wait a minute!" she grabbed his hand and he looked at her. She continued in a loud whisper. "What is your problem?" "I don't have one. You can let me go now." "With pleasure." Keesha let go of Jax's hand and went into the bedroom, shutting the door. Jax walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water. Mrs. Sellers watched quietly as he opened a cabinet. "Wrong one." she said as he stared at all the food. "Yeah...sorry. Delivery?" there wasn't near that much food when he looked last night, searching for the popcorn. "Keesha." "Keesha?" "Seems she got up and ran errands while we were sleeping this morning. And here we thought she just left...where are you going?" Jax went back up the stairs and knocked on Keesha's door. "Yes?" Her eyes clouded over as he walked in. "What?" "I apologize." he stated simply. "Great." she picked up her book again. "You know, after last night it is completely logical for me to think you would just leave..." "I told you last night that I would have come back to say goodbye. I wouldn't just leave Mrs. Sellers. But beyond that, her reaction to me when she saw me wasn't anything like yours. Which is odd, considering it would be between her and me, it has nothing to do with you...you know why am I discussing this. You said you're sorry, I accept." Jax looked at her. "And I'm sorry about last night. That was my fault...I just..hate feeling controlled." "I wasn't controlling. At least that wasn't my intention." "This whole situation is controlling. Do you know how much I hate not being able to do what I want. I feel like a complete burden here...I've been a burden from the moment you've met me, no wonder you're angry." Jax closed the door, walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed, next to Keesha. He wanted to look into her eyes, because he needed to make sure she really understood what he was about to tell her. "You are not a burden. Mrs. Sellers is lonely...that is one of the reasons she likes having you here, it's why I'm still here...do you think she enjoys living out here in the middle of nowhere by herself? But this is her home, and it's all she has. She doesn't have her husband, her daughter is way across country...so the thought of you hurting her by leaving after everything she has done for you angered me. Mrs. Sellers won't show you any disappointment, but it doesn't mean she doesn't hurt, or that she could be worried. So next time you leave, leave a note so she knows you're coming back. Please." Keesha sighed. She never really thought of it that way, but it made a lot of sense. "I guess it was good to have you here so she could tell you these things." "She didn't tell me, I just know." "How?" Keesha whispered as she found herself beginning to get lost in his eyes. "How do I know what? That she's lonely?" Part of him wanted to break eye contact with her, but Jax continued staring. "Because...it's something I recognize." "You're lonely?" Keesha asked softly. "I can't beleive that." "Everyone is lonely sometimes....some of us more often than others." Jax watched as Keesha sat further up the bed. "That should be impossible...you are one of the sweetest people I have ever met. Anyone would be lucky to be...around you. You should never feel lonely." Jax blinked. "I thought I was grating on your nerves." "Yeah, well you can't be perfect." she smiled. "But I can't think of anyone who would do for two complete strangers what you've done for me and Mrs. Sellers. Your heart is as lovely as your smile. Anyone can recognize that. You must know a lot people. They should be flocking. How can you be lonely? Ever?" "I've never really *known* anyone. When I look back on it, even when I thought I knew someone, I never did...and I knew it then but chose to ignore it. It's the story of my life. Or it was...because I feel I know you." Keesha closed her eyes for a second as Jax's hand touched her face. She opened them, her heart racing from his warm touch. "You give me too much credit. It was very easy to help you when you needed it. The hard part is leaving when you obviously don't need me any more. So if that makes you a burden, then yeah..." he found himself bending closer to her. Her eyes closed. "...you're a damn large one." he breathed against her lips before brushing his across them... "LUNCH!" Jax jumped back as Mrs. Sellers called upstairs. "Alright!" he answered. He looked at Keesha. "Do you need some help?" "Um..." Keesha tried to gather a train of thought. Jax picked Keesha up, carrying her down the stairs. Jax sat Keesha down in her chair at the kitchen table. "Thank you," she said quietly. Jax gave her a nod and left, going back upstairs to change into a shirt. "What exactly have you two been arguing about?" Mrs. Sellers asked, surprised at the silence between them. "It's cleared up now." Keesha smiled. Of course that was the problem. Her heart completely broke as he explained how he could be lonely...that he was lonely. Yet, she still couldn't understand, why was someone as wonderful as Jax lonely. Any woman who who could have Jax would have the prize among men Keesha now realized. And the fact that this prize was alone...she didn't understand. Keesha watched as she stirred her soup absently with her spoon as Mrs. Sellers continued to watch her wheels turn. Jax finished washing his hands. *What* had he done? Keesha was a woman who had thoughts of her ex...he knew that, she as much said so by her silence when he asked her. He listened to the water running from the faucet into the sink. Yet, obviously she had thoughts of a man who wasn't deserving of her. Jax realized, listening to her talk about burdens and not liking to be controlled, that someone must have hurt her. Mrs. Sellers had told him last night that Keesha had gotten into a fight with her "ride", which she put in qoutes, and that's why he found her collapsed on the road. Although he wondered what she meant, he hadn't put too much thought into it until Keesha started talking, and then he realized where her anger yesterday had come from. All the peices started to come together...why she insisted on being so "defiantly independant". Whatever happened, the scars were still there. Which was an added reason that he shouldn't have tried to kiss her. There were many reasons he shouldn't have... However none of them seemed to matter to him. He finally turned off the water and left the bathroom, going into the kitchen. Lunch was eaten pretty much in silence, both Jax and Keesha responding simply to conversational questions Mrs. Sellers would throw out now and again. "I made a lot of headway with your attic." Jax volunteered. "Thank you." "I'll finish it after lunch, and then I think I'll be going. I should head back home." Keesha looked over at Jax's statement. Of course he was leaving. Actually that was probably for the better. "To the hotel?" Mrs. Sellers asked. "No. I think my family has suffered enough." he smiled. "I'm going to see my brother." "There's two of you?" Keesha couldn't help but grin. "Sort of." Jax laughed. "We're rather different though." "Where are you?" "I'll be back sometime tonight." Jerry sat down on the couch. "So you forgive me." Jax shrugged. "You're being you. I've given up trying to get you to do the right thing you know." "Protecting you at all costs is the right thing. Don't come home empty handed either...you should bring us something for having to deal with you." Jerry hung up as Jax started to laugh. Jax hugged Mrs. Sellers goodbye. He wrote down his phone numbers. "Good Lord boy, how many numbers can one person have?" Jax chuckled. "That's to my family's estate..." "Estate?" Jax continued. "That's my condo, the other is my office, and the last is my cellular, which actually should be the first number you try because I almost always have it with me. Where's Keesha? She will hunt me down if I don't say goodbye after the grief I gave her when I thought she'd do the same." "Really, then maybe you should just leave so she has a reason to follow you." Jax arched his eyebrow. "Kidding. She's on the porch. Drive safely and know you're always welcome here. I expect a visit or two." "Sure thing." he gave her one last hug and then left the house. "And off he goes." Keesha said without looking at him. "Yes." Jax looked out into the field. Once again there was silence. Finally Jax took a deep breath and walked over in front of her. "Bye." "Bye." Keesha smiled softly. "No thanking..." he said, interrupting her next thought. "Bye." he repeated and bounded down the stairs as Keesha watched. She stood carefully, going to the edge of the stairs, balancing against the banister. Jax stopped at his motorcycle. He glanced back up at her and her eyes grew as he ran back over to the porch. He stopped in front of her. He wanted to kiss her so badly. Keesha continued to search his eyes as her heart stopped. She looked down as he managed to step closer and then glanced back up into his eyes. Jax wrapped his arms around Keesha tightly. Keesha returned his hug, sighing deeply as her eyes closed. His scent, his hold, seemed to invade every fiber of her body and her hands slid down his back before she managed to hold him even tighter. Jax rested his chin on top of her head, his hands travelling up her arms. He pulled back reluctantly and her eyes opened to his. His fingers played gently with the edge of her curls. With one last breath he bent, kissing her on the forehead. "Goodbye Keesha." "Take care Jax..." Keesha slowly let go of his waist. "Promise me." "I promise." Jax responded with a whisper and Keesha's eyes teared as she watched him leave again, hopping on his bike and driving away. Mrs. Sellers turned away from the window shaking her head. As they said, she thought, life can be wasted on the young. There was a reason both of them were on that road. And that reason was plain as day as far as she could see. Why would either of them let go of this chance? Shani