Chapter 36

Jerry got out of his car. He stared at Miranda, sitting on his
doorstep. "I thought you already had your things." he stated simply as
he walked up.
"I want to talk to you." she stood.
"We have nothing to discuss."
"Jerry, please." she placed her hand on his arm. "Please listen..."
"I'm tired of listening to you. Besides, I wouldn't beleive a word you
were to say anyway."
"I don't..." Miranda sighed. *How* did he find out about her and
Hendrickson? *How?* "Jerry, please. Just give me a few
minutes...please."
"No." Jerry opened his door and stepped inside, shutting it
immediately. But he couldn't turn away from the door. Part of him
really wanted to hear her side...and he was wondering why he cared so
damn much.
"Persistent little thing, isn't she?"
Jerry opened his eyes slowly. He leaned away from the door and turned.
"Bobbie?"
"So what did she do?"
"Nothing." Jerry immediately turned on the charm as a grin grew across
his face. "...with what do I owe the pleasure?"
"What did she do Jerry?" Bobbie asked again, her anger growing.
Keesha placed her menu back on the table. "What's wrong?" she asked
quietly.
Everything. "Nothing." Jax replied just as softly.
"Don't keep things from me, Jax."
"I'm not. Really. I've just had a tiring day."
She continued to stare into his eyes, trying to pin point what exactly
could be bothering him. "Is it about this morning?" she asked as she
reached across the table, taking his hand in hers.
Jax smiled. He looked down at their hands. "You never give up do
you?" Then he sighed, pulling his hand away. "I don't want to discuss
it now, if you don't mind."
Now Keesha was completely confused. She thought the whole point of
meeting Jax here was so they could discuss exactly what was going to
happen to their marriage...whether they were going to continue it, as
she hoped, or take some steps back and get the divorce, like they
originally planned. "Okay, you're starting to worry me..." Keesha
stopped speaking as Jax's phone rang. He excused himself and reached
into his pocket.
"Yes."
"Can you come over?" Jerry looked at the ring on the table. He
refused to pick it up...maybe if he left it, she would return.
"Jerry...what's wrong?"
"Just come over." Jerry hung up.
"Jerry?" Jax walked into Jerry's house. He looked around the living
room, and saw the cabinet to the wet bar open. Slowly he walked behind
it. "Jer?"
"Want some?' Jerry looked up from the floor. He held up the bottle of
tequila.
Jax stared at his brother for a moment. He slid down and joined him,
leaning up against the wall. "What happened?"
"Bobbie left me."
Jax blinked. "She..."
"Left. Walked right to that door...threw the ring I gave her for our
one year anniversary and hit me with it." he laughed bitterly. "Nice
aim those Spencers."
"Jerry..."
"And then I watched her walk out...and I don't want to hear it." Jerry
stood. "I can't go after her. It wouldn't change anything."
"I don't understand." Jax looked up as Jerry stood carefully.
"Of course you don't. Neither do I."
"How did this happen?"
"You know, Miranda....Cassadine...wanting to know if I knew about
Corinthos....it was just one big fight-where we just rehashed things
over and over, and got absolutely nowhere. Have you ever had one of
those fights? Oh yeah...we have." Jerry laughed again.
"And we made up too." Jax offered Jerry some hope.
"I don't know what I would have done without Bobbie there to support me
then. I don't know what I'll do without her now....I really love her,
you know." Jerry admitted, his voice growing soft.
"Then why are you telling me, Jerry. Go and find Bobbie, and tell
*her*."
"I tried lying to her, for you." Jerry attempted to change the
subject. "But I couldn't..."
"Jerry we aren't discussing me..."
"I'm sure that Bobbie beleives I had something to do with Sonny.
Whether she tells Carly is another story....you know what they
say-there's nothing like a woman scorned."
"Damn it Jerry...let me repeat myself." Jax stood. "This is not about
me, don't worry about it...I can handle Carly. In fact, I'll just go
and tell Carly myself."
Jerry grabbed hold of Jax's arm. "You can't. It won't do any good."
"Why?"
"Because Bobbie is not going to forgive me, whether you tell Carly it
was you or not. And it wasn't just you, I knew all along...I helped
even. You setting yourself up is not going to help me, and all it's
going to do is hurt you, and then..." what would he do? "Just don't,
Jax. I need your word."
"And once again, Jerry sacrifices for Jax."
Jerry and Jax turned at the sound of the female voice. "Miranda."
Jerry said quietly.
"Get out." Jax commanded.
"I won't say anything Jerry." Miranda focused. "I promise. You want
it kept quiet...and I will keep it that way." she glanced over in Jax's
direction. "But only for him" she pointed at Jerry. "....because
that's what *he* wants."
"Miranda, leave. This doesn't concern you." Jax attempted to control
his anger. Jerry didn't need any added stress right now.
"Do you want me to go." Miranda ignored Jax and stared at Jerry once
more.
"Promise me." Jerry looked at them both.
"I promise."
"As if a promise from you means something." Jax countered against
Miranda's agreement.
"Jax...leave us."
Jax turned and looked at Jerry. "No..."
"This is my house and I want you gone. I need to speak with Miranda
alone."
"Jerry..."
"Now, Jax."
Jax sighed deeply. He turned his attention back to Miranda. "If you
take advantage of my brother in any way, I will destroy you." he
promised with a icy glare before walking out.
Miranda watched as Jax closed the door. She looked over at Jerry once
more. "I'm sorry." she held her arms out.
Jerry studied her quietly.
"Please, Jerry. Let someone take care of you for a change."
Jerry looked down. And then slowly he came over, and Miranda wrapped
her arms around him tightly.
It was just a matter of time. Jax came up the porch slowly.
He couldn't let Jerry take the blame for his stupidity.
And he couldn't let harm come to Keesha.
If only he had just left Sonny alone....
But he hadn't. And now he had to fix things.
Jax closed the door to the house quietly.
"How's Jerry?" Keesha asked cautiously.
"A mess. Bobbie left him."
"She...she left him?"
"Miranda is with him now."
"Miranda?"
"She knows that I am why Sonny's in jail."
Keesha ran her fingers through her hair. "We are why Sonny is in jail."
"Not as far as she knows. And it's going to stay that way."
"How?"
"Because...because you are going to leave me because of it."
"Are you nuts?! I am *not* going to leave you..." Keesha stood from the
couch.
"You *have* to. Keesha...sweetheart..." Jax closed his eyes. Forcing
himself to open them he continued, keeping his voice calm, and his tone
rational. "It's not safe. Bobbie thinks Jerry is involved, and I will
not let him take the blame for this. If she even considers telling
Carly, I have to go forward."
"I understand that...."
"No, you don't really understand. Because of me..."
"*Us* damn it!"
"Because...Sonny and Jason *and* Moreno all are going to have serious
axes to grind when it comes to me. And the best way to get to me...is
through you. Unless they think the only reason I married you, was to
get the information."
"No..." Keesha shook her head. She absolutely refused to let this
happen....she couldn't be alone again. And she couldn't leave Jax
alone again....
"And if they think you just found out...and that you thouht I used
you...and that's why we're not together then..."
"I cannot...I *will* not be without you, Jax...you can't ask me to do
that...because I refuse." Keesha took a breath, adamant.
Jax closed the space between them. He took her hands and offered, "You
won't be without me...I love you."
"And I love you."
Jax looked down.
"I know. We love each other. And that's why, we won't really be
without each other...if you need me, then I'll..."
"I need you *now*."
Jax looked up at her small plea.
"Keesha..." Jax reached up and wiped the tears from her eyes.
"You can't just make a decision like this..."
"I didn't. It's important for me to get you to understand...*why*.
I'm trying to be as honest as I can..."
"I'm not..." Keesha pushed his hands away. "I am not leaving."
"Keesha...if you don't leave...I will."
"No, you won't."
"Yes. I will."
"Then I'll just...I'll tell Sonny myself..." Keesha turned quickly and
started to go upstairs...
Jax grabbed her and pulled her to him. She fell back against his body
and he wrapped his arms around her tightly as they each faced the
stairs. "It would kill me if something happened to you Keesha."
"That's not fair..."
"This isn't *about* fair. This is about you...and keeping you safe. I
promised you...I promised myself when this started...that I would keep
you safe. And right now, keeping you safe...means asking you to leave."
"Jax, please..."
"Keesha, Miranda knows. It's only a matter of time before Sonny finds
out. Don't you understand that?"
She bent her head, shaking it slowly.
"I don't want to hurt you. If I hadn't been so damn selfish...." Jax
closed his eyes. "I'm sorry." he buryied his face in her hair.
Promises. Jax had promised to keep her safe. And though right now she
couldn't care less about that, she did care about her promise.
Not to hurt him.
And if she stayed that's exactly what she would be doing....
"Let go." Keesha said quietly.
Jax looked up. "What?"
"Let me go."
Slowly Jax released his grip on her. She turned around and then she
reached up, standing on tiptoe. She brushed her lips against his, and
he opened his mouth to her. They kissed gently, holding hands and
lacing their fingers. Jax reluctantly pulled away "I love you." Jax
mumbled against her mouth.
"I love you." Keesha replied with a small smile. And Jax tried to
regain his senses, tried to prepare himself for her asking him to let
her stay...insisting on staying...
"I'll always love you." Keesha finished.
Jax closed his eyes again. "Keesha..."
Jax opened his eyes, watching as she moved past him quickly, running
out the door.
Shani