DEAR GOD
A few Housewives were sitting around the table talking, and the subject turned to their husbands. One lady said, "My husband just won't go to church with me. I think he's going to go to Hell."
This led to talk around the table and it was generally agreed that, for one reason or another, all the husbands were going to end up in Hell.
So then the housewives started speculating about themselves. One woman said "I try to be good - I'm sure I'll make it to Heaven."
Another one said "No, I did this bad thing I won't make it."
So then they noticed that one of the ladies wasn't saying anything.
They looked at her and said "You're such a nice lady, surely you're going to Heaven...?"
She says "No, first thing in the morning I'm going to buy me a ticket straight to Hell!" They were shocked and asked "Why??"
.
"Well, you don't expect me to live in a world without men, do you?"
A Few shorts......
The child comes home from his first day at school.
His Mother asks, "Well, what did you learn today?"
The kid replies, "Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow."
"Dad, Can you write in the dark?"
"I think so. What is it you want me to write?"
"Your name on this report card."
Little Johnny's Kindergarten teacher was quizzing them on the alphabet. "Johnny," she says, "what comes after 'O'?"
Johnny says, "Yeah!"
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