William, the duke of Normandy: 1048 to 1060

Nobody wants you to be the king of France, not even your wife. When you try this invasion of the heartland of the king of the "Franks", you incure the outrage of every loyal Frenchman; and there are a whole lot more of them than there are Normans. Your campaign is short and abortive. If you survive it, and we suspect that you do, you can count on one of a couple of things as the outcome of your rash attempt to get rid of your most powerful enemy in a single stroke: king Henry will pardon you on the condition that you give up all future claim to the duchy and settle down somewhere like a good boy; or, he will imprison you for life. History notes you only as "William the (rash) Bastard."