cyma


i cannot hear the future
ever-creeping up behind
the resolution of a suture
an innocence i’ve left to die

when there were times i’d write these missives
of mere gibberish, more fodder for the gibbous
as the light of the moon, so fathomless
dwindled ever the more beneath a frightening duress

while i tucked away my emptiness and tied it to my past
since i dare not fear the future, for it’s never meant to last

there’s no time left for forever
so i just want to hold together
what’s left of me
the worldly remnants
of the boy i used to be

the boy i once believed would change the world
now that i’m left to reveal what my secrets have unfurled
the piteous lament of my keening
for believing i was all that i could be

pretending to be perfect in each and every way
it led me to assume i’d live a year in every day
for every perished world i lie in wait

while i descent in fall
i wish i were invincible
impervious to change
but while i feel like i’m whole
i keep my distance from the same

blinded by the darkness of my eyes
my life has been wasted in secrets and lies
though the truth changes nothing
it spares me from the waning
of a childhood lost in vain

an end to what was once
forever tattooed upon my heart
an end to innocence
my cynic love gone up in arms

though i’ll never fear the future
i fear forever just the same
because i know what is my future
is a death to what remains




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