WARNING: This is a slash story, which means it contains male/male erotic content involving consenting adults. If you're not of legal age or are offended by such material, please go find something else to read.

TITLE: Guess Who's Coming With Dinner?
AUTHOR: Dovielr
EMAIL: dovie@softhome.net
CATEGORY: PWP, Humor/Parody, Romance
RATING: NC-17 (for language, graphic sex, bondage, and D/s dynamics)
DISCLAIMER: Anyone or anything you've heard of before belongs to the Goddess, J. K. Rowling, not to me.
DISTRIBUTION: The more the merrier ... Just let me know where.
DEDICATION: To Becca ... and she should know why.  :-)
SUMMARY: Umm ... Snape, Lupin, bondage, food, teasing, and sex ... Not that those are bad things, but ... what more could you want?
WARNINGS: This is not, I repeat not, my normal masochist!Lupin.  I hope that doesn't disappoint anyone.

"So ... now you have a werewolf chained to your bed.  What are you going to do with him?"

Remus strained against the fastenings that held him bound to the bed.  They weren't exactly chains, although chains were involved.  His wrists and feet had been placed in padded leather cuffs that were chained to some sort of leather straps encircling each corner of the mattress.  He'd no idea where these had come from, or when his lover had installed them.  He certainly didn't think they had been there the night before, although the sheets could have hid them quite easily.

As he lay there, flat on his back, awaiting the answer, his captor looked down on him thoughtfully--almost appraisingly--rubbing his chin.  One eyebrow went up slowly, languidly even.  But Remus wasn't worried.  He knew his body could stand up under the closest scrutiny, even when that assessment came from someone as demanding as Severus Snape.

"Anything I want."

The words came out in a low, luxuriant purr that made Remus quiver.  He closed his eyes.  God, that man certainly knew what he could do with his voice alone.  Knew it and revelled in it.  Remus' eyes snapped open again when the mattress tilted to his left side under the weight of Severus' kneeling on the bed.

"Oh no, my dear little werewolf," Severus purred again.  "I don't want you to see what's coming next.  You'll have to rely on your ears--"

"The better to hear you with?" Remus quipped, grinning, as Severus blindfolded him.

"Indeed, as well as your nose, skin, and tongue."

This was whispered close to his ear, and Remus shivered again, as much from the words as the sudden rush of cold air.  With a wave of his wand, Severus had apparently removed all of Remus' clothing.  Robes suddenly draped over his body again, however, as knees planted themselves firmly on either side of his hips.  A hand braced its owner's weight by the side of his head.

Severus' scent then drew closer and closer, and Remus gasped just in time to permit a tongue to enter his mouth.  He moaned into the kiss, as Severus caressed his tongue and mouth with his own tongue.  In an instant, Severus was gone again, leaning back, again resting his weight on his knees, as evidenced by the slight curve to the mattress that Remus felt somewhere in the vicinity of his hips.

"Accio basket," Severus muttered.

That was very clever, Remus thought, to pack away all the things he planned to use in a basket.  If he summoned them individually, Remus would certainly know what they were.  Weight by his head again signalled Severus' imminent return.

"We're going to play a little game, Lupin," he whispered.  "I shall treat you to several different sensations.  When you correctly guess what the object is, you'll receive a reward.  If you are wrong, you'll be punished.  How does that sound?"

"Well, I'm not really in a position to argue..." Remus said.

Severus laughed softly.  "That's true.  But I promise you'll enjoy this game."

Remus bit his lip.  He wasn't quite as sure as Severus that he'd enjoy this, but his lover would never really hurt him.

"All right, Severus," he said tentatively.  "I'm at your mercy."

"Also true."  Severus chuckled, kissing him again.  He licked the tip of Remus' nose before sitting up again.

"I know that one," Remus said.  "Definitely your tongue."

"You'll be wishing they were all that easy," Severus purred, laughing again.

And, with that, he delved in the basket, as Remus could clearly hear things being shunted about somewhere about a foot down the bed diagonally from his right ear.  Something very soft then slid down the length of his chest.  The object traced over his abdomen, conforming to the curves of his skin.  It was suddenly gone, and then it was back, on his left arm, moving slowly toward his chest.  It vanished again.  When the sensation reappeared, draping over his right arm, Remus tried to grab the object with his fingers.  It was slick, but not wet, as it slipped from his grasp.

"Silk," Remus whispered.  "A silk scarf?"

"Now, Lupin, you may take your time," Severus purred, again trailing the object over Remus' chest.  "You don't want to be punished, do you?"

"I'm almost certain it's silk."

"Well, you are correct, my dear little werewolf.  Now, for your reward."  Severus leaned down and kissed him, slowly and deeply.

"That's quite a reward," Remus whispered, breathlessly, when Severus pulled his lips away.

"Motivation for you to try your best," Severus murmured before sitting upright again.

"I think I'm going to like this game," Remus said, with a wide grin.

Severus chuckled as he again rifled through the basket.  This time, the object was not trailed over Remus' chest, but rather his lips.  It was wet and sweet, and Remus quickly recognised the scent.

"Pineapple," he said, opening his mouth wide to receive the chunk of fruit.

"Anxious for your reward, Lupin?" Severus asked.  The scent suddenly got more distant, as though he'd pulled the pineapple away.

"Actually, I am."

The smell drew closer again, accompanied by the weight near his head.  His suspicion was shortly confirmed:  Severus intended to share the bit of pineapple with him while kissing.  As soon as Severus' lips touched his, Remus bit the chunk of pineapple, and Severus' tongue followed it into his mouth.  Severus was certainly right:  He was definitely enjoying the game so far.

Again Severus delved into the basket.  This time something soft tickled Remus skin.  Severus drug the item across his chest, arms, and face, which made Remus sneeze.  It was definitely an animal part of some sort, probably a feather.

"It's a feather."

"Ah, but what type of feather, Lupin?"

"Oh, that's not fair!"

"Well, you're not really in a position to argue, remember?" 

Remus bit his lip, and Severus chuckled, as he again trailed the feather all over Remus' chest, neck, face, and arms.  Remus screwed up his face, thinking hard, trying to identify the feather by scent.  And his nose began to itch horribly.

"Severus, will you scratch my nose, please?"

"Certainly, Lupin."

Severus' fingernails were on his nose without delay.

"Left.  No, my left.  Down a little.  Ahhh ... Thank you."

"Anytime, my dear little werewolf.  Have you decided yet?"

"An ostrich feather?" Remus asked, tentatively.

Severus clicked his tongue in disapproval.  "Close, but no, I fear.  An emu feather.  Well, you must be punished now, Lupin."

Remus braced himself, waiting, wondering what his punishment would be:  Tickling?  A pinch?  A slap?  He was completely unprepared for the sensation that followed.  Severus rose to his knees and closed his fingers around Remus' hardening cock, squeezing and pumping it slowly.

"That's not a punishment," Remus gasped, arching into the wonderful touch.  The caress stopped suddenly, and Severus was again at his ear.

"You may think that now," he purred, "but just you wait.  Before long, you'll change your mind."

Severus' weight was then again on Remus' hips, and his hand again went into the basket.  This time, when it returned, cold drops of water dribbled on Remus' chest.  He jolted and bucked against his restraints as Severus trailed one extremely cold, wet object over his skin.

"Ice!" Remus yelped, trying to squirm away from the cold.  "Ice, definitely, ice!"

"Are you sure, Lupin?" Severus asked, teasingly, tracing the ice around Remus' nipples.

"Yes, definitely!"

"That's right."

The ice was then taken away, and Severus again leaned down to kiss him.  Then something soft and absorbent replaced the ice, mopping up the remains of the cold water.

"A towel?" Remus ventured, smirking, not sure if this was part of the game or not.

"Don't get overconfident, Lupin," Severus said.  "What kind of towel?"

Remus' frowned.  It was part of the game.  The towel was small, so it had to be a tea towel or hand towel.  The cloth had a pattern to it--stripes--so it was more likely a tea towel than a hand towel.

"A tea towel," Remus answered, triumphantly.

"Yes.  And what colour?"

"Striped."

"What colour stripes?"

Remus frowned again.  "Er ... blue."

"No.  Brown.  Nice try, though."

Again Severus rose to his knees and gave Remus' cock a few strokes.  The man's hands were magnificent, and the touch ended far too soon.  Remus then thought he should probably get everything wrong from now on.  Of course, Severus might give him a real punishment then, but Remus was a brave Gryffindor.  That was a risk he was willing to take.

Now it was another piece of food.  The smell wasn't nearly as strong, but the texture on his lips gave it away:  a piece of banana.  In his eagerness of having deduced the identity of the object so quickly, Remus started to say that, but then remembered he wanted to fail on purpose.  Then again, he'd have to come up with a convincing wrong answer, and what else smelled and felt like a banana?

"Oh, come now, Lupin!" Severus said.  "This shouldn't be that difficult."

"A banana," Remus said finally, with a sigh, when he couldn't think of a good substitute.  Then something else occurred to him.  "Oh, I mean a plantain!  Yes, a plantain."

Severus chuckled again.  "I see.  Well, you were right the first time."

Again Severus pumped his cock, and Remus thrusted his hips to meet each stroke.  Maybe Severus wouldn't really punish him for being wrong.  Then that talented hand left again and went back into the basket.

Suddenly Remus heard a crackling noise, like something being ignited.  It was a moment before any new sensation came along--just long enough for Remus to dread what he thought was the smell of a candle burning.  When searing hot drops of molten liquid dribbled onto his chest, Remus yelped and again tried to move away.

"Wax!  Hot wax!"  He didn't care to get that one wrong; he just wanted it to stop.

"Very good," Severus purred again.

The ice was then back on his chest, to soothe his skin.  And again it was followed by the tea towel.  Something else came afterward, though--something cool and smooth--which Severus spread on the burns, slowly and lovingly.

"Burn ointment?" Remus guessed. 

"Mmmm hmmm."

Severus again leaned down to kiss him.  This kiss was longer, slower, and deeper than the last.  Of course, it was two rewards in one ... Remus was torn.  He really loved the way Severus kissed, but he preferred that man's wonderful hand on his cock.

After Severus had reached into the basket again, another cloth started moving across Remus' skin.  This material was stiffer than the silk, because it didn't hug the curves of his body as well.  It was smoother than the towel, though.  And it felt surprisingly cool.  Remus was relatively sure it was...

"Satin?" he asked.  Then he shook his head, frowning.  He was supposed to be missing on purpose.

"What colour?" Severus asked.

"Chartreuse," Remus replied, without a second's hesitation.

"Interesting choice, Lupin, but quite wrong," Severus said, laughing heartily.

He stroked Remus' cock again, slower this time, squeezing harder, and Remus groaned loudly when he stopped.

"You see?  I warned you that would become a punishment soon enough."

"I believe you!" Remus gasped.

More food came to his mouth this time.  Part of the texture was wet and slightly rough; the rest was smooth and drier.  It definitely smelled like an apple.  But, Remus wondered, could he get away with...

"A pear?"

"Well, now you're not even trying," Severus said.  "I suppose I'll have to step up your punishment."

With that, Severus got off the bed.  Footsteps travelled around to the other side, and Severus retrieved the basket.  He was going to draw this out as long as possible.  It must be something really bad.  When Severus climbed back atop the mattress, he didn't straddle Remus' hips.  Remus bit his lip.  He'd probably get bitten or pinched this time.

"Oh, God!" he cried, again trying to sit upright, as lips closed around the head of his cock.

Severus chuckled as he slid his mouth down the length of Remus' shaft.  His tongue cupped the underside as he drew away, very slowly.  Once again Severus' mouth went back down--as Remus groaned--and back up.  A few more such agonizingly wonderful strokes followed, and he was all but panting when Severus stopped.

This time the sounds from the basket were nearer his chest than they'd been before.  Remus imagined Severus planned to sit at his side so he could reach both his mouth and cock easily.  That wasn't a bad prospect at all.  Quite the contrary.

Something very soft, but not cloth, then brushed against Remus' chest.  Whatever it was, it tickled, and it didn't drape the way cloth did.  When Severus drug it over Remus' nipples, some of it stayed behind.  It had no smell that he noticed, which didn't help at all.

"I give up," Remus said at last.

"That is not an acceptable answer, Lupin."

Remus groaned again.  "All right ... wood."

"You know you're going to hate your punishment even more when I draw away this time.  Why don't you try again, Lupin?  Give it your best guess."

The soft, fluffy object then brushed Remus nose, and it tickled awfully, but the texture on his face felt vaguely familiar.  Severus let the object rest on his neck for a moment.  It had almost no weight, but it covered a large area.

"Cotton?" Remus asked.

"Correct," Severus replied.  "And now for your reward."

This time it wasn't a kiss.  This time his reward was Severus' mouth on his cock again, but for longer--much, much longer.  Remus gasped and writhed, trying to thrust into Severus' mouth.  And he moaned loudly in frustration when Severus took his lips away, but that was certainly motivation to begin guessing correctly again.  Another edible item came along next.  The texture was rough on his lips, but the smell gave it away.

"A strawberry."

Severus didn't even bother to answer this time.  He merely took Remus' cock in his mouth again, sliding up and down, sucking and teasing with his tongue.  And another piece of fruit followed the strawberry, before Severus took his mouth away.  This one had no taste, and very little smell, until Severus gave it a squeeze.  As the juice dripped onto his tongue, Remus knew what it was instantly.

"A grape."

"What colour?" Severus murmured against the head of his cock, as he dropped the grape in Remus' mouth.  He was keeping up the pretence of the game, at least.

"Purple," Remus gasped, as Severus' mouth slid down the length of his cock again.

More succulents followed in rapid succession, as Severus bobbed his head up and down Remus' cock.  Remus didn't think he was guessing any wrong now, but Severus no longer appeared to be gauging the accuracy of responses.  In fact, Severus seemed much more interested in the responses his own mouth elicited.

"An orange ... ahhh ... a pear ... oh, God ... another banana ... pom--ahhh--granate ... more apple ... blech."  Remus attempted to push the offending substance out of his mouth with his tongue.  "Wax, again.  Why are you feeding me that?"

"Oh!  Sorry, Lupin.  I didn't mean to grab the candle."

Severus apparently decided attempting to feed Remus while fellating him was too much of a break in his concentration.  He then turned his full to Remus' cock and, in a matter of seconds, Remus shot into his mouth.  After that, however, Severus decided to feed him one more thing, as they shared his come while kissing.

"Are you up for another game, Lupin?" Severus asked while removing his blindfold.  With a snap of his fingers, Remus' restraints disappeared.

"What this time?" Remus asked, grinning broadly.  "Charades?"

"Very droll.  I was thinking more along the lines of my buggering that lovely arse of yours."

"Oh, I'm always up for playing that game," Remus said, smiling and rolling onto his stomach.