5/1/02 (kal)
"Well, no word on the hacker, but all sources (Tim) point to Sean L., who has apparantly been trying to hack into peoples' sites from some computer class." Kal was stating hard evidence, but preparing to follow up with his oh-so-funny humor. "And we all know that Tim has been soooooo helpful with this whole hacker thing. Oh well, who cares? This page sucks balls anyways." Kal was disappointed at his lack of visitors to the site, and he knew it was all Matt's fault. That bastard had always ruined things for him. "Today in gym we were playing Badminton (or however the hell it's spelled) and I lost horribly to Chris and Alyssa (7-0 and 7-1) but beat matt horribly twice (7-2 and 7-0). I played migitron, and because Willy wasted a fuckin half an hour being a jackass, the game never finished and she was ahead by 2. But I would have won if the class hadn't ended, but screw that. Screw you. Screw me." Kal sat there thinking for a minute, wondering how that last one would be taken. But deciding not to care, he changed topics. "Hey, I wrote a song for English class, and everyone cheered on me to read it, but I refused. I probably would have done it, if Mrs. Large weren't our teacher." Kal had forgotten how much he hated her. Until of course, he remembered that she existed, and that was enough to fully piss him off. "Check under SOTD for "The Cardboard Man". In fact, click here to read it, and then read the following stuff on this page. Read the poem first though, or you'll lose the effect. Okay, are you done reading it? This is purposely cheesy, what do you expect for a "Mrs. Laaaj" poem?" Kal's anger brewed inside of him as he thought more and more about how stupid it is for someone to MAKE a 9th grader write a song. "Good thing I wasn't trying to meet standards with this song, or else it would have sucked much worse. Look for it on the forthcoming Pills album, "The Pills Volume III: The Pills Go Hollywood". Don't worry loyal fans, it's like "We're only in it for the Money" by Frank Zappa. They obviously weren't, but it makes for a good laugh or two. Actuallly, I doubt many people will laugh, especially without this being explained." Kal knew. Kal knew that the simple minds that infest his pathetic hack-job haircut of a school wouldn't understand for a fleeting second what the hell any of this means. Hell, even Kal didn't know what he meant. "Don't be too eager for PGH, it won't come out until even after "The Pills Volume II: The History and Lives of The Pills". I don't even know if there will be a volume I, because I honestly don't think out previous work of shit deserves a title, but it is called "Mattsterpiece Theatre Volume I: Idosyncratic conversations & Improvisational music provided by Kal". Buy it here. The song itself is meant to sound like one of those eighties power ballads, sort of like what Adam Sandler does on "The Lonesome Kicker". It will start out sort of mellow, like palm muted clean power chords, and then pick up and get dramatic during the chorus. Aside all of that, only 4 more days...