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Patience with Teens!

By: Mubarak Abdessalami

            You surely have experienced this. Many of your ambitious projects had been aborted just because of hasty irrational stupid points of view of some moody people. I admit that the stupid was neither you nor those moody opinions. Let's call it fate to be relatively fair. As they didnít grasp the essence of your ideas, they rushed to say, "What such an awful idea!" This is a bare sabotage. I guess your projects those days would exceed their time and sparsely were understood. I donít blame anyone for anything now that things are getting clearer. You would have been in advance of your time. Why by now you can do nothing to prove or at least to show that you were right. Since you had never been encouraged, step by step, you started to reject your own projects as being ludicrous or nonsensical. Yes, they partly were so.

            However; encouragements were what missed and they were all that you extremely needed to go on with your time-surpassing projects. Now I only say that you weren't lucky at all. There was always someone somewhere, in your family first, who had a lighten advice or suggestion originated in a deep ignorance of what those projects were like, "Donít do that lest you should be a loser.", "Be realistic and look at reality in the face. There's nothing you can do with this!" and so on. What do you think now? Would your dexterity and gifts, no matter how miraculous they were, resist? You doubt about it, and so do I!

            Idon't want to advise you to go over the gaffs your supervisors did but I'd prefer to advise grown-ups to encourage their children to be inventive. "You are upbringing them for another time (in the future)" as the prophet Mohammed peace be upon him said. Let them discover the limits of their inner and acquired abilities and skills. Even though their ideas seem to be crazy and ridiculous, they might predict results that you cannot imagine yourself. I am sure they are likely to be colossal. Guidance should replace bad "suggestions". Just back them up and see what miraculous things they are able to make out of their thoughts and day-dreams. Don't just dispirit them. Don't make the same mistakes again and keep repeating to young people, "What do you intend to do with this crazy idea? Do you think a sane person might do what you intend to do?!" If their thoughts are insane for you, it is because you can't understand their ways of reasoning: You belong to another time (their past). And although their ideas are insane now, there is a big chance that they'll be genius in the near future. Look round you, several past insane ideas are now working perfectly well. They even look like miracles. When Jules Verne imagined submarines, everybody took it for fiction only. Donít just force yourself to say one day, "If I had known, I would or I wouldn't have Ö" It would be too much late for remorse. What is done is done and will never be undone. This is always the case when we make big mistakes and try to justify by saying, "I only didn't know!" instead you have all to make an effort to anticipate your time values and rules and bend towards the hidden facts about the future. Everything is possible, success as well as failure. There is no difficult or impossible thing but there are reluctant people. Yet, experience is needed to rub it all clean again. The experience you acquire will show you the stupidity with which you previously managed your life. Older people know more 'how' because they used to be in direct contact with its zone of operations. Failing attempts are what make experience show up. Most gigantic successes come after a long ordeal with repetitive failures.

            Intimidating is all that most parents and grown-ups are good at, with good intentions of course. They always imagine they know it all; or at least they do it out of fear for their children's unknown and uncertain future. They cannot accept that the past is theirs of course but the present is almost a totally new galaxy. Let the young people endeavor to prove they are able to make "miracles". Donít just try to push them either backward or forward. Let them experience life as it is. Don't be protective, this way you'll just break the enthusiasm in the children and make them renounce whenever they had the opportunity to be independent. With time they will take it for granted that only you who can think the right way and this will create a sort of braking impulsion in them. They will be but helpless, submissive and dunce creatures. They will permanently convince themselves that what they are about is completely nonsense and they prefer to give up before you can force them to do so with your ignorant comments and remarks. Alternatively you have to develop a broad insight about the future. You have to take it for granted that without taking risks nothing is accomplished or achieved. Be positive and think twice before you discourage your children. Believe it or not, they belong to another era with other rules and norms that are completely strange to you.

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