"I think I can die happy now, I've seen a piece of heaven."

The petite blond swiveled around on her barstool and took a good look at him before erupting into laughter. "You're not going to tell me that line actually works, are you ?"

Nick flashed his best shy smile before sitting down next to her.

She smiled back.

She's mine.

"Actually, you'd be surprised what works. Kinda scary really." He chuckled and her smile only grew.

"Don't tell me, let me guess. I've heard them all…" Her eyes rolled upward in mock-thought. "Did it hurt ? when you fell from heaven……Do you have a map, I keep getting lost in your eyes……Pardon me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can I borrow yours…".

They broke out laughing and she leaned toward him, offering him an inviting view of her cleavage. The effects of the drinks Nick had been downing were beginning to surface as his gaze wandered down her chest and an eyebrow arched in approval. When he looked back up into her eyes she was staring at him. A deep, challenging stare.

"Those are lame…lemme see, I bet I can top those though." Nick crinkled his forehead in thought for a moment, subtly taking in the girl's shapely crossed legs. "Baby you must be tired cause you've been running through my mind all night."

She giggled then smirked, expressing her disapproval in a teasing tone. "Come on, you can do better than that…how about, um…know what would look good on you ? Me."

Nick nodded through his laughter. "Do you sleep on your stomach at night ? Can I ?"

"If I told you you had a nice body, would you hold it against me ?"

His laughter reduced to a sly grin as his voice lowered and his eyes fixed on hers. "I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight."

She took a slow sip of her drink, here eyes never leaving his.

"Are you wearing your space underwear, because your ass is out of this world." She arched an eyebrow and gave him a sexy smile, slowly leaning a bit further in his direction.

He knew the signs all too well and followed her lead, leaning forward as well, bringing their faces close. "Can you feel the magic between us…no lower."

She chuckled at his line and eyed his lips as he spoke. He was licking them, causing her to lick her own in anticipation.

She stared straight into his eyes. "Wanna play army ? You can lay down and I'll blow the hell out of you."

He half smiled. A cocky, arrogant smile. This is too easy.

Their lips were close, so close that he could feel her breath on his mouth. In an instant his left hand came up to her neck. His long fingers snaking into her hair as his thumb lightly grazed her cheek. He tilted her face up slightly so she would look at him and he saw the glazed over lust in her eyes.

"My name's Nick…remember that, you'll be screaming it later."

A small sigh escaped from between her parted lips. Definitely too easy.

As their lips were about to meet she whispered, "Sandie". Nick pulled back slightly but only long enough for her to explain, "My name…it's Sandie."

He barely acknowledged her words. He was much more intently focusing on the moistness of her lips, the feel of her breast under his left hand and the feel of her ass under his right. His head swam a little and his body felt hot and loose, a familiar feeling he'd grown to relish. He could taste the wine she'd been drinking and for a fleeting moment thought of Miranda and how much she liked wine.

His pants suddenly became very tight.

He squeezed his eyes shut to chase away the thought and pulled Sandie to him, almost onto his lap, as their kisses became even more heated, desperate.

She pulled away and roughly bit his bottom lip. With a coy smirk she rasped, "You forgot my favorite one…"

"Oh ?" his voice was a breathy whisper. "And that would be ?"

"Nice shoes…wanna fuck ?"

Nick's drunken smile grew. She'd do for tonight.

************

"You've reached the Sprint PCS voicemail of…Nick…please leave a message at the tone."

"Hey. It's Randa." Her voice was raspy and quiet. He could tell she had called him late at night when he'd had his phone turned off. Damn. "I didn't think you'd be awake but…oh well, I was just hoping maybe."

He settled deeper into the fluffy hotel pillows as he smiled into the phone. She always seemed to have that effect on him. No matter what, she made him smile.

"It's almost 2 am and I just got home. Even if it is a little late I'm checking in like you asked me to. See, I'm a good girl." There was a pause where she sighed quietly and Nick's brow crinkled just a little bit in worry. She sounded wiped out. "I'm exhausted but I can't seem to fall asleep lately…guess you've spoiled me and I need you here with me, my body is so lonely in this bed without yours."

He hugged a pillow to his chest and buried his nose into it the same way he loved to do to her hair. It didn't feel like her. It didn't smell like her. It was a terrible substitute.

"Well, at any rate I guess this won't be a complete waste since you'll get this first thing in the morning…". She suddenly sounded amused. "And my voice is all scratchy just like you like it…am I turning you on baby ?"

He groaned at how well she knew him but couldn't help a light chuckle as her giggles floated through the phone.

"I guess I better go, it's late and I have a meeting tomorrow morning. Try not to work yourself too hard and call me when you can, ok ?" She was quiet for a long moment and any trace of playfulness suddenly disappeared from her voice. "I miss you Nick."

He held the phone to his ear a moment longer and closed his eyes, wishing she was the softness he was holding so close to him.

I miss you too Ran. God, I miss you.

************

He was about to come. If she kept on sucking him like that he was definitely going to come.

His large hands reached down and grabbed her upper arms, tugging on them brusquely, indicating that he wanted her to stop and fortunately she did.

Her eyes wantonly stared up into his as her tongue snaked out and licked up his shaft. He caught the glint of her tongue ring as she licked her lips and slithered her way up his body.

He didn't know if it was the alcohol. He didn't know if it was the drugs. He didn't know if it was that damn tongue ring but he was on fire. His entire body was sweating.

That fantastic tongue dragged up his chest and nibbled on his nipples, then up his neck a little before deliciously probing into his mouth. He liked it when girls took control every now and then and tonight was one of those nights he just wanted to lay back and take it.

Nicol seemed to be happy to oblige.

Her body was now stretched out along his. He could feel every inch of her from her toes rubbing up and down his calves to her breasts pressed against his chest. Her hands seemed to roam all over his body and he responded in kind. She felt good. He was enjoying it. But it was missing something.

Kelly had it.

Miranda had it.

But with every other girl the electricity wasn't there. He wasn't surprised, he was actually quite used to it by now.

He closed his eyes and leaned his head back as she pulled herself up and mounted him, immediately sinking down to take him in completely. She simply stayed still for a moment as her silky warmth enveloped him and he closed his eyes to focus on the feeling and enjoy it.

And it felt good.

With his eyes closed and his mind running wild from the drug and drink, he immediately thought of Miranda straddling him and couldn't help but thrust up slightly in response. Lately it seemed he couldn't close his eyes without seeing her, she was always there. He had to admit, the times they'd made love had been mind-blowing. And yes, she'd been a first for him. She'd been the first who he'd ever made love to. He'd felt good before but never had he felt the way he did with her.

Never. Even Kelly was a different feeling.

And now he felt the familiar tightening in his groin at the very thought of being inside his precious Randa. The feel of her hips under his hands as she rode him. The feel of her body pinned under his as he thrust into her. The look on her face when he finally took her over the edge. It was all inexplicably beautiful and new, innocent and erotic at the same time. It was perfect.

He was so lost in thought he hadn't even realized he was pushing up with a strong steady rhythm now. His breathing was heavy and an occasional groan slipped out as he bounced her on his lap.

Hands wandered his chest leisurely and he couldn't contain a small smile, that is until he heard Nicol let out a small moan. His eyes snapped open at the sound of her unfamiliar voice and registered who he was with and immediately he felt a twinge of guilt.

He pressed his eyes shut again.

He'd never promised to be faithful. She'd never asked him to. Yet there it was, deep down in his stomach. A tiny, guilty pang which cut even through his stoned and drunken haze. He was confused, but he didn't have time to sort it out any further at the moment. His body screamed to go harder, faster, and almost as if she could read his mind, Nicol picked up the pace. Nick arched his back clear off the bed in approval. As much as his mind and his heart wanted to be true to Randa, his body was betraying him. It always seemed to do that.

He suddenly felt hands on his shoulders and was quickly tossed over, so he was thrown on top. Nicol dragged her fingernails down his back and sunk them into his skin as she firmly grabbed his ass before giving it a smack.

"Oh baby…oh yes Nick baby." Nicole gasped, only adding fuel to Nick's fire. He was already burning white hot inside and his movements seemed to guide themselves, knowing exactly what to do to take his body to its limit and then hold off just enough to make it last a little longer.

His head swam. His balls tightened. The force of his thrusts rocked the headboard into the wall repeatedly. "Fuck you feel good." He rasped, his eyebrows scrunching together and his forehead crinkling in concentration. "You like that baby…huh, you like it like that ?" he panted, never breaking his rhythm or diminishing his forcefulness.

A wicked smirk flashed across Nicol's lips as she let out a pleasurable moan.

The sound only made Nick hotter, harder and more insistent. He propped up on his elbows above her and slid his hands behind her head, tangling his long fingers in her mass of wavy hair. He was on auto pilot now, his body leading his actions with the sole purpose of feeling good. He was blinded to any of the guilty feelings he might have had in the last few minutes. At that moment, nothing existed but the deliciously passionate feeling coursing through his veins.

His fingertips grazed her scalp as he gripped her hair tight, pulling her head back. His mouth went straight for her neck, sucking and licking, nipping and kissing. He worked his way to her ear and Nicol's entire body jerked up when she initially felt and heard his hot breath on her skin.

"Can you feel what you're doing to me…can you girl ?" he growled deeply. "You're driving me fucking crazy. Fuck."

Nicol's head was now hitting the headboard as he lifted her body with each subsequent push. "Oh God…oh yes…fuck yes." She yelled as her body trembled and tensed beneath his. She clutched at his back, then his shoulders in an effort to bring him even closer to her, if that was at all possible.

Their sweat slicked bodies collided rhythmically and Nick couldn't help but let out a deep growl when he felt teeth sinking into his shoulder. His mouth dropped open in pleasure as he then felt her lick over the sore spot. He loved to fuck. And that's what this was, plain out fucking.

His eyes opened and focused on Nicol's long curly hair splayed out around her face and the look of absolute lust in her heavy-lidded eyes. She was a beautiful girl, very sensual. He closed his eyes again at the repeated sensation of her fingernails digging deeper and deeper into his ass as she pulled him into her.

His eyes barely opened when she began to writhe in ecstasy. "God, you feel good." She moaned. "DO you feel it too baby ?"

"Ugh, God yeah."

"Mmmm, I like it when you feel good." She purred. "Who makes you feel good baby ? Who fucks you right ?"

Nick grimaced. He couldn't hold off much longer. "Christ."

He was close, so close, and his head dipped down in exhaustion and relief as the delicious tingling began to intensify throughout his body. She wanted him to say her name but his head was foggy and for the life of him he couldn't even remember the name she'd told him. He was trying to concentrate but the overwhelming feeling taking over his senses was consuming him. All he could focus on was the pleasure he was feeling, the erotic vibration that began to run through him.

His body tensed and shook, violently jerking into her repeatedly as he came.

After a long, still moment he raised his head and drowsily looked into her face with a satisfied smile. "That was fuckin' amazing, Nicol." He rasped as he placed a light kiss on her lips before collapsing next to her in a breathless heap.

Her name was Nicol. Thank God he'd remembered, for a minute he'd thought he was losing his touch.

************

"Hey, you've reached Ran. Sorry I'm not in but feel free to leave a message. Thanks."

"Hey yourself. Why is it I can never get you at night when I want your sexy voice to be the last thing I hear before falling asleep, huh ? Should I be worried some big LA hotshot is moving in on my girl ?"

Miranda giggled. He was the only man she'd ever met in her adult life who could make her giggle. It was almost embarrassing.

"Anyway…I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow. I can live one day without hearing your voice, right ?" He sounded unconvinced and there was a short pause where Miranda could almost see Nick pouting as he picked at the bedspread, thinking of what to say next.

"Be good, ok baby ?" She smiled at how soft and child-like his voice had suddenly gotten. "I miss you."

End of messages.

She sighed wistfully as her head leaned against the back of the couch. She loved his voice. She could probably listen to it all night. But as superficial as it sounded, it was his body she missed the most. Not for the obvious reasons but for the subtle ones. The way the very tips of his fingers caressed her shoulder when they were watching tv…the way his chin rested on top of her head when they were cuddled together in bed…and the way his huge arms wrapped around her and held her tight all night after making love. She'd never liked to be held before, it had always been uncomfortable and kept her from sleeping. But not with Nick. He was not only comfortable…he was the most comfortable feeling she'd ever known.

Her arms wrapped around her own waist and her smile grew.

They'd been trying to take it slow, but it felt right.

Nothing had ever felt so right.

Her arm swung over and her fingers searched for the appropriate button on the answering machine. His voice filled the room again.

"Hey yourself. Why is it I can never get you at night…."

She could definitely listen to his voice all night.

************

Soft arms shifted on his body as Nick stirred around in that haze between sleep and awake, cursing the stuffy feeling in his head. He squinted into the subtle light of the hotel room and groaned inwardly as his head began to pound.

Was it possible to be numb and in pain at the same time ? Apparently he'd found a way to manage it.

He looked down to his chest at the dark-skinned arm draped across it and tried to remember the previous night. Bits and pieces was all he could conjure up.

Tony had introduced them. That much he could still remember, he was still fairly straight when that happened.

Her name was Angela, or Angie, something like that. She'd been funny and they'd laughed. She also had great tits…or was it her ass ? It started to get blurry at that point since he'd started drinking pretty heavily.

It was anybody's guess after that. Had he invited her to leave with him ? Probably, but he didn't remember any of that since he'd also decided coke would be added into his little one-man party.

And the sex ? Fuck. His body ached like all hell and he was sore down to his calf muscles, but he really couldn't remember it. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he had a feeling that it had been incredible. Real down and dirty.

But he'd been too fucked up to remember it.

He hated when he did that.

Nick sighed and closed his eyes. He pulled his hand out from under his pillow and groaned in frustration as his fingers habitually went to his hair.

Clunk.

"Ow, what the fuck…". Nick scowled, staring at his wrist where an empty handcuff dangled from the one still fastened to him. His body seemed to be coming more to life with every movement and the painful stiffness he felt all over was increasing. It had apparently been a good night, a very good night…but it was going to be a bad day, he could feel it.

As if on cue, his cellphone rang from somewhere in the depths of the large hotel suite.

Shit.

He didn't even move to answer it, he knew who it was.

As abruptly as it started, the ringing stopped and Nick sighed in relief. The shrill noise had done nothing for his headache.

Angie turned over onto her side and Nick stole a glance at her.

Her long braided hair was partially covering her face and her full lips were slightly parted causing a light snore. Her skin was beautiful, perfect almost, and Nick couldn't help but reach over and run a finger delicately over her shoulder and down her arm. It was then that he noticed she had tattoos. Three Japanese symbols on her upper arm which she'd probably explained to him. A lot of good that had done, he had no idea what they said.

His fingers continued to stroke over her skin and Nick closed his eyes. Who was this girl ? And what was he doing in bed with her ? When had his life gotten so out of hand that he woke up with a random stranger every morning without so much as a vague recollection of the night before.

Was it worth it ? He couldn't help but wonder if it was.

A fleeting thought momentarily dashed through his mind, a quick memory of why he'd started the madness in the first place. He liked to feel a warm body next to him. He liked to hold someone while he slept. And the more he experienced, the more he was convinced that there was nothing more beautiful than the female body.

And then there was the sex.

He'd had all types, from slow and seductive to fast and furious, and it all appealed to him…called to him. It made his body feel real and alive, and it made his soul feel wanted and loved. It filled the emptiness he felt every time he looked at Brian and Leighanne or any other happy couple for that matter. And it made him feel a little less lonely, especially when they were on the road.

But even that wasn't helping now.

Nick frowned and his eyes opened. His head pounded and he couldn't ignore the hollow feeling in his chest. Maybe he needed to eat something.

He sat up slowly, partially to make sure he didn't wake his companion but mostly so as to not jostle his head too much. He couldn't think. His brain was muddled and confused.

Maybe he'd call Kelly. She always had a practical way of looking at things that made them seem clearer and make more sense. Of course, he'd only really discussed business matters with her but she explained those pretty well, maybe she could clear up the mess he had going in his life. Maybe. Or maybe they could just fuck. The smile grew on his face again, man could she fuck.

Nick looked down at the girl beside him and gently brushed the hair out of her face. Angela. A pretty name for such a pretty girl with what he was sure was a pretty body underneath that sheet. At night when he was high he was sure she'd looked like every other slut that was his for the taking, but somehow in the light of day she looked like she deserved better, most of them did.

He shook his head. Sometimes he really didn't like himself too much.

He leaned his head back against the headboard while the dizziness passed and thought of the day ahead. It was past 1:00 and he had to be ready for soundcheck by 3:30. He had plenty of time except that he wanted to get this girl out of his room so he could shower and call Miranda.

Miranda.

The thought alone made him smile, really smile. She was the only one that could do that lately. His ray of sunshine in an otherwise bleak existence. It was she that made him feel real and loved, not the countless others.

But he generally tried to block that out of his mind.

She was half-way across the country and the thought of how much he longed to be with her was just too painful. Randa was the one who took away the hollow loneliness. She was the one he longed to have wrapped in his arms every night and the fact that he couldn't literally made his stomach ache.

The movement next to him interrupted his thoughts.

"What time is it ?" Angie mumbled as she stretched.

"Uh, quarter after 1." Nick hesitated as he rubbed his eyes with the base of his hand, feeling the cold metal on his wrist was still there. "Um, I'm gonna take a shower, you got the key for these ?"

Angie surveyed his uncomfortable and disheveled state and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Yeah, we put it in the drawer so we wouldn't lose it."

"Oh. Yeah."

It was obvious from the flatness of his voice that he didn't remember that and Angie just watched him, amused, as he just sat there, struggling with trying to wake his body up enough to get out of bed.

"You don't remember much of last night, do you ?" Angie eyed him, still wearing an amused smile. She didn't seem bothered in the least.

At the sight of her ease, Nick let out a relieved breath. "Nah, sorry but I really don't." He cast her a shy smile, "I have a feeling it was pretty kick-ass though." He announced as he held up his hand, indicating the handcuff.

"Pretty fuckin' kick-ass alright." Angie chuckled to herself. She stretched once more and stared at the ceiling. "Go ahead and take your shower, I'll be gone by the time you get out." She shrugged matter-of-factly.

Nick frowned and picked at the handcuff. Was she dismissing him, it sure sounded like it.

He moved his feet around but in their awakening numbness they felt confined, bound. He reached over and got the handcuff key, quickly undoing it and dropping it on the small table next to him. God, he was tired, he needed a shower. Bad.

“Nick ?”

He looked at Angie over his shoulder, actually feeling a small amount of regret for having spent the night with her.

She smiled. “You may not remember it, but you’re the best I’ve had in a long time.” She sat up, letting the sheet drop to her waist.

It had been her tits. Now he could see why that was one of the few things he could remember, she definitely had great tits.

“Thanks Blondie.” She stood up and began the search for her clothes, leaving Nick with the sudden desire to bolt out of bed and into the bathroom just to get out of her sight.

He quickly rubbed his palms over his face and drew his fingers back through his tangled hair. He could feel all of his body now and didn’t like what he felt one bit. Performing was going to be a bitch if he still hurt that bad that night. And what the fuck were his legs tangled in ? He shifted his feet, harder than he'd intended to and flung the sheet to the side, exposing them.

"Great. Fucking great." He mumbled as he untangled the rough leather whip from around his ankles. "Just fucking great."

************

“So what are you wearing ?”

Miranda snuggled further down into her pillows and just let the deep, rough sound of Nick’s after-show voice make love to her over the phone.

“I’m not having phone-sex with you Nick.” She giggled, although he’d been away for so long the thought had definitely crossed her mind.

“Aw c’mon Ran.” He pouted. “You wouldn’t do that for me ? Even if I used my wittle baby voice ?”

She groaned, “You are so not playing fair…”

“I just wanna know what you look like while I’m talking to you.” He explained, his voice very soft. “Come on, I miss you. Humor me.”

Miranda melted further into the fluff around her and smiled. What was it about him that she couldn’t bring herself to turn him down ? She was convinced she’d do just about anything to keep a disappointed look from ever gracing his beautiful face. “My pj’s.”

It was Nick’s turn to groan, and it sounded a lot more tortured than hers had.

“What ?” The confusion in her voice was evident.

“You mean to tell me you’re talking to me naked ? You’re killin’ me over here babe.”

She couldn’t help but all out laugh. “Who said anything about naked ? I said pj’s ! Since when does that mean naked ?”

“Well whenever I’ve slept with you, you’ve slept naked. How am I supposed to know what your pj’s look like ?”

“That’s because I can’t seem to keep my clothes on around you. I don’t usually have that problem, the rest of the time I sleep in a tank top.” This conversation was definitely amusing her. She’d been sleepy when the phone rang but she was wide awake now.

“Mmmm, a tank top and what ?” His voice was back to being a deep seductive growl and Miranda couldn’t help but wonder if he knew just how sexy he sounded.

“Just a tank top and undies…anything else bothers me.”

Another deep groan. “God girl, I need to see you so bad.”

“I think you want to do a little more than just see me.” There was that giggle again.

“I’m serious Ran.” His voice was still deep and soft but it was evident he was serious. “I’m going home in two weeks for a few days, come down with me.” A small smile was creeping across his lips which transferred over into his voice. “You know you want to. Think about it…the boat, the sun…just us two…we could be naked all day…”.

“As tempting as that sounds, weren’t you going home for some family thing ?”

“Beej’s birthday. So ? That’s only a little while, we can have the rest of the time to ourselves. C’mon, I want to introduce you to Aaron anyway. I’m sure he’s gonna love you.”

That stunned Miranda speechless for a moment. They’d had enough late-night conversations that she’d figured out Nick’s unspoken rules. Family introductions of passing girlfriends was something he adamantly avoided, especially when it came to Aaron. He protected his brother far more than he needed, and respected him far more than most people imagined.

She couldn’t disguise the shock in her voice. “You want to introduce me to your family ?” She wasn’t sure if she wanted to laugh or cry but could feel her eyes burning.

Nick chuckled, feeling a bit embarrassed for some reason. “Well, yeah. I mean, I wanted to bring you down after the tour was over but this is even better.”

When she didn’t respond, he continued. “Please Ran. C’mon. I wanna see you so bad…and don’t worry about them, they’re gonna love you as much as I do. Please ?”

Had he just implied he loved her ? Damn, she was such a sap. She was definitely going to cry now.

Nick worriedly chewed on his lip when all he could hear was silence. Had he moved too fast ? Shit, his stomach was rapidly tying in knots. “Ran ? Baby, you there ?” He sighed, “You don’t have to meet them if you don’t want, I just thought….”

“No, please Nick, it’s not that.” She sniffled and smiled through her tears. “I’ll go, of course I’ll go.”

Her smile grew even more when she heard Nick sigh with relief on his end.