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Title: What's Old Is New Again
Author:  Celia Stanton
Email:  xfilesdiva@excite.com
Category:  Story, UST/Romance, 1st person POV
Spoilers:  Boomerang
Archive:  Go for it, just drop me a line first.
Summary:  Every wave starts with the slightest ripple.
Disclaimer:  Oh, yeah, right.  I wish they were mine.  The whole Scooby gang belongs to Donald Bellisario and CBS.  Amie's mine.

Notes:  Okay, I admit it.  I got the idea for this little ditty while watching "Dawson's Creek" this week, and after chatting it over with Nicole, decided to go for it.  We're in the middle of the fourth part of the "Winter Wonderland" series, which actually has (gasp) a plot!  Who knew?  Anyway, if this gets to be too much like the DC ep, I apologize, it just really inspired me.  The background on the case Amie works on is actually true, but the outcome is not.

Thanks and dedication:  To Terri:  No matter what, Shelby, Leslie and Ashley love you.  So do I.  Sing that Trisha, baby!

---------------------------------

My mom used to say that every wave, no matter how large, starts with the slightest ripple.

If she's right, ripple, thy name is America Louise Grace.

I lean back in my first class seat and play with my necklace, a nervous habit from childhood, and think about the events of the past week, and their possible ramifications.

It had all started out innocently enough.  I was consulting on a case for the Loudon County (Virginia) Sheriff's Department about an elderly man whose body was left for investigators to find near a river.  For four years he'd had no name, no relatives to claim him, until a teenager had been reorganizing his high school's magazine collection and a copy of "America's Most Wanted: The Magazine" fell out, opening to the morgue picture of his great uncle John.  The LCSD had called me down to interrogate the family, seeing as family based crimes are my specialty.  From there, the case was virtually open and shut, and I should have been on the next plane back to JFK…until my mom called.

Now, my mom and I are best friends, and we talk every day, case or no case, so I wasn't surprised when she called me.  But it was her final words to me that changed everything.

"Isn't Harm stationed out of Virginia, darling?"

Harm.

Hooboy.

I still chuckle at the memory of Harmon Rabb, Jr., and our escapades as kids together.  I was literally the girl next door, the one he never noticed, until senior year.

He already knew he wanted to be a pilot; he was already preparing for his Academy entrance exam.  I was a wild child, taking after my hippie mother more than my Navy father.  But senior year I took that criminal justice class that changed my life…and that's when he noticed me.

Only one word seems to sum up our year together:  amazing.  Absolutely amazing.  Our normally opposite personalities just meshed together.  We could have conversations without saying a word.  But things end, as they inevitably do, and while he stayed in California, I headed out to Georgetown.  We lost touch during college, but when I went to the Forensic Sciences department at GW, he was entering the Academy and I ran into him—literally, I never watch where I'm going during my daily run—during one of their simulations on campus.  We exchanged numbers and started hanging out again, renewing that bond we had shared, but never mentioning the romantic side to our relationship.  We celebrated when I got accepted to NYPD and cried after his accident.  When I moved to New York and he moved to JAG, we started speaking less frequently, barely seeing each other, but I still get butterflies in my stomach when I see an email from him waiting for me on my computer.  Those emails have increased since his return to JAG after his deployment, and now we talk almost every day, after his return from Australia.
 

So, I'm rambling.  I have a tendency to do that, as Harm will tell you.  Anyway, I figured, what the hell?  You're only going to be in Virginia once this week, Amie, go ahead.  So I did.

JAG Headquarters is truly a beautiful place, a breath of fresh air from the bland and dismal stationhouses and interrogation rooms of the NYPD Detective division.  I walked in and was delighted to find out Harm was defending in court that morning.

Eager to see Harmon Rabb the lawyer in action, I all but ran upstairs and found the courtroom, quietly opening the door and sneaking inside.

Time had definitely been good to Harm.  His face was starting to show the early signs of age, but those eyes of his still danced with youth.  He was more poised than I remembered, calmer, more collected.  After about ten minutes, the judge dismissed for lunch and the courtroom rose, me along with it.  People began to file past me, but I remained in the back part of the court, butterflies in my stomach as Harm started to turn around.

He spoke with his client, but a smaller woman in a Marine uniform took his attentions away, who placed a single hand on his arm.  I watched with interest at the way Harm looked at her, and grinned.

So that's Mac.

I didn't have much time to think about it, as Harm finished his conversation with his client and then looked back at Mac, a boyish grin adorning his face.  He spoke again to her as they started to leave the courtroom, and then stopped dead in his tracks when he saw me, his jaw dropping open.

Grinning, I turned around and stared at the paneled walls for a second, then looked back at him, feigning a confused expression.  "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to stare?"

Harm dropped his briefcase on one of the benches, walking over to me with his arms open.  "Actually, she did tell me to stare at you, once."

I laughed and then walked into his hug, having to go up on my toes to clasp my hands around his neck.  "Hey, sailor."  I said quietly.  Releasing him and placing my feet back on the floor, I leaned back and looked at him, grabbing his hands.  "Well, you certainly look like hell."

He laughed.  "Well, you smell like a sewer rat."

"At least I have some charm left in me."  I scoffed, biting my lip to keep from cracking up.  Remembering we had an audience, I leaned around Harm and extended my hand to his partner.  "I'm Amie Grace, an old friend of Harm's."

She took the offered hand, looking briefly from me to Harm and back again.  "Lieutenant Colonel Sarah Mackenzie.  Mac."

"Nice to meet you, Mac. I've heard such wonderful things about you."  I said, not daring to look at Harm, as I could already feel his gaze on me.

Mac again looked from Harm to me, confusion etching her pretty features.  I didn't say anything, figuring Harm could explain it.

Harm cleared his throat and then spoke.  "What the hell are you doing here, Er?"

I shook my finger at him.  "None of this 'Erica' stuff.  It's Amie.  It always has been, you doof."

Harm grinned.  "Nah.  In here," he said, tapping his chest, "You'll always be Erica to me."

I rolled my eyes and flashed my badge at him.  "See?  Amie.  A-M-I-E.  That's my name."

Harm scoffed and noticed Mac's confused expression.  "Amie's full name is America.  I always thought Erica was a cooler name, so when we were growing up, I called her that instead of Amie."

I nodded and Mac said nothing for a moment.  "So you two grew up together?"

I nodded again.  "Both our dads were Navy.  There's something nice to be said about base housing.  Always interesting people to meet."

Mac nodded.  "I'm sure." She shifted her briefcase from her left hand to her right, a ring catching the sunlight.  I leaned over and motioned to it.  "That's beautiful."

She self-consciously checked her hand, using it to brush a non-existent strand of hair behind her ear.  "Thanks."  After a minute, she said hurriedly, "Well, I'll let you two catch up."

I snuck a glance at Harm, who just nodded.  "See you later."

Mac smiled briefly and then said to me, "It was nice to meet you."

I held out my hand to her again. "You too."

She took it, shook it briefly, and left.  I turned to look at Harm, an eyebrow quirked.

He chuckled.  "Don't start."

I held my hands up in an "I'm innocent" gesture.  "I wasn't going to say a damn thing."

He smiled and gestured to the bench.  "So what are you doing here?"

"Working a case out of Loudon County."

He nodded, not saying anything and staring at the floor.  I sighed internally; he had always been difficult to talk to.

"So that's Mac, huh?"  I finally asked.

His head whipped up and he stared at me.  Finally, his expression softened and he sighed.  "Yeah.  That's Mac."

"She's nice."

"Yep, she's nice."

"You could get her a bigger ring than that."

He shook his head, chuckling softly.  "Already did."

I leaned over and smacked him on the arm.  "Then what's the problem, dolt?"

He leaned his head back against the wall of the courtroom, staring at the ceiling.  Finally he shrugged.  "She's made up her mind."

I motioned to the door.  "That is not a woman who has made up her mind regarding anything.  She's waiting on you.  But she certainly isn't going to wait forever."

He turned his head to look at me.  "She loves Brumby."

"Does not."

"Does too."  He replied, looking incredulously at me.

"Does not.  I've seen women in love.  That, my dear, is one on the verge of being in love with this BugMe character, but not quite there yet.  You, on the other hand…"

He shook his head.  "It's over."

"Does it have to be?"  I countered.

He ran a hand through his hair.  "Want to grab some lunch?"  He said, standing.

I rose with him.  "Don’t change the subject."

"Amie, it's over.  Just let it be."

I rolled my eyes.  "Whatever.  But as I've said before, you're an idiot."

Slinging his arm around my shoulders, he grinned down at me.  "But I'm your idiot, right?"

I groaned.  "Only if you feed me.  You people don't have stale donuts and day old coffee like good old NYC."

He flashed me that grin of his that used to get him anything he wanted.  "How about I introduce you to the wonders of the JAG cafeteria?"

I nodded.  "Sure, what the hell."

He ushered me into a room that reminded me far too much of our old high school cafeteria.  He grabbed a sandwich for himself and handed me my favorite: tuna fish on rye.  We paid and I waited next to the cashier for him to direct me.  Silently, he nodded towards a door that led outside.  I pushed open the door and was nearly blinded by the sunlight, but at the same time loving the warm spring day.

Harm walked across the courtyard and sat down at an iron table, not worrying about politeness or courtesy with me.  I shook my head and placed my sandwich and iced tea on the table, sitting down myself.

He unwrapped his sandwich and took a bite, looking up at me as he did so.  "How've you been?"  He asked quietly.

I unwrapped my own sandwich and ran a hand through my brown hair, shrugging.  "You know how I've been."

He shook his head, leaning back in his own chair.  "Our conversations are all me, Amie.  I want to know how you are."

I pulled a piece of sandwich apart from the rest and popped it in my mouth.  "Fine, I guess.  Mostly consumed by work, like someone else I know."

He smiled briefly. "How's John?"

I pursed my lips and looked out over the JAG grounds before replying.  "I wouldn't know."

A confused look crossed his face.  "What do you mean?"

I shrugged.  "Apparently one of his students wanted a little extra credit, if you know what I mean."

He placed a hand over my hand.  "I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "Better to find out now than ten years from now.  I wouldn't have wanted to feel like I made the biggest mistake of my life, you know?"  I asked pointedly.

He shook his head, taking another bite of his sandwich.  "Don't start, Amie."

I nearly threw my hands up in exasperation.  "Harm, you know I love you like a brother, so when I tell you this, it's with the utmost love and admiration.  You, my dear, are a goddamn coward!"

He took a long sip of his water.  Finally, he spoke quietly.  "I know."

Not expecting that answer, I startled just a bit.  "So what the hell's your problem, Harm?"

"I can't let it go just yet."

I raised an eyebrow.  "I know you've been hurt a lot in your life.  But, Harm, you can't keep running from love just because there's a possibility your heart might get broken."

He raised his gaze and looked pointedly at me.  "You did."

I groaned, lolling my head back.  "I knew you were going to throw that back in my face."

"Why shouldn't I?"  He countered, his voice getting icy around the edges.

"Harm, we were eighteen!  Children, for crying out loud!"  I sighed, lowering my voice and lacing my hand through his.  "I know now that I loved you, okay?  I couldn't say it, for a couple of reasons.  You gave me a future, Harm."  I moved my head around to get the hair out of my face without breaking contact with him.  "I realized how dependent I was becoming on you, and that scared me shitless.  But even so, Harm, it would have never worked.  You’re meant to be with someone else, and so am I.  I just haven't found my soulmate yet."

He sighed.  "You broke my heart."

"And you're never going to love again because of a mistake I made twenty years ago?"  I snorted.  "Then you're dumber than I thought, Harm."

He didn't reply, just looking at me.  Finally he sighed.  "You're right."

"It happens."

He smiled.  "Yeah, one of those flukes, I suppose."

I squeezed his hands.  "No matter what happens, Harm, I'm always here for you."

He nodded.  "I know."

We finished our lunch in companionable silence, until a short, pudgy man in a Naval uniform hurried up to the table.  "Sir, court's about to be called back into session."  His gaze flickered from Harm to me, his gaze rivaling Mac's initial one.  Harm held out his hand.  "Bud, this is an old friend of mine, Detective Amie Grace.  Amie, this is Lieutenant Bud Roberts."

I smiled, holding out my hand to him.  "Nice to meet you, Lieutenant."

He smiled back, shaking my hand firmly.  "You too, Detective."

Harm rose, gathering the trash from lunch.  "You interested in seeing me at work?"  He asked, gathering up his briefcase.

"You mean you actually do something constructive here?"  I bantered back, smiling.

"From time to time."  He laughed, holding his hand out for me.  I took it, the odd sense of comfort sweeping over me as it had twenty years ago.

"Actually, can you point me in the direction of the ladies' room?"  I asked as we entered the building.

Harm nodded and pointed me in the right direction.  I swung the big brown door open and hurried to one of the stalls, eager to see him in action.  I went to wash my hands when another stall opened and Mac stepped out.  I smiled at her reflection in the mirror, and she smiled briefly as she turned the water on.

"So you know Harm."  She said, and I looked at her, a tad confused.

"Yeah, we went to high school together."

"I'm not usually that chummy with my old high school classmates."  She said quietly, and I nearly laughed as I heard jealousy in her voice.

I ripped off a piece of paper towel and dried my hands.  "We dated for a while, but we're just friends.  He understands me like no one else can."

She nodded, turning off her water.  "I can understand that."

I threw the towel out, running a hand through my wind whipped hair and then looked at her.  "Spit it out, Colonel."

Her brown head spun quickly around and she looked at me, confused.  "What are you talking about, Detective?"

I shrugged.  "I have the feeling you want to ask me something."

I nearly burst out laughing again as I could see the defenses shoot up around her.  She shook her head crisply.  "It's none of my business."

"He's never mentioned me before."  I stated.  "That'd sure piss the hell out of me."

Mac sighed, studying a corner above my head.  Finally, she shook her head and moved to exit the ladies' room.  "It's really none of my business.  It was nice to meet you, Detective Grace."

I watched her as she left, internally shaking my head at the two of them.  "You too, Colonel Mackenzie.  You too."
Harm's Apartment
North of Union Station
1839 PM

"So then we're all there in the morgue, and poor Benny has no idea what's about to happen, while the rest of us are peeing our pants because we know.  So the coroner moves the sheet off of the body and the Captain bolts upright yelling 'Boo!' and Benny faints dead on the floor.  Boom.  Out cold. It was hysterical."  I said as I washed the dinner dishes later that night at his apartment.

Harm laughed along with me.  "Sounds it.  You guys are so mean to your rookies, though!"

I shook my head, handing him the plate to dry.  "It's no different than your crossing the line escapades or whatever they are."

He nodded thoughtfully.  "True."

I handed him the final dish and turned off the water, rinsing my hands of the suds.  "All done."

Harm replaced the dishes in his cabinets and handed me a towel to dry my hands.  "Great team."

I smiled up at him.  "Always were."

Harm smiled again and leaned up against the counter.  "So have you decided what you want to do tonight?"

I shrugged, mimicking his posture and nudging his foot with my toe, just to annoy him.  "Well, I have to be back in the city tomorrow morning.  How about we rent a movie and just hang out?"

He nodded.  "Want to come to Blockbuster with me?"

I shook my head.  "Nah, I should call in to the precinct.  Can I use your phone?"  I asked, following him into his living room as he donned his jacket and grabbed his car keys.

"Sure, just don't be charging any 900 numbers to me."  He headed over to the door.  "Any requests?"

"Something fluffy."

He made a gagging sound and I resisted the urge to throw my shoe at him.  "All right, I'll be back soon.  Don't get into too much trouble, Aim."

I crossed my heart.  "Promise."

He grinned and shut the door behind him.  I wandered over to the kitchen counter and opened my files, grabbing the portable phone on the way.  I was in the middle of briefing my Captain when there was a knock at the door.  I hopped down from the stool and padded over to the big steel door, looking out the peephole.

Well, if this wasn't unexpected, I don't know what is.

I opened Harm's door, the phone crocked against my ear and waved at Mac. I motioned her inside as the Cap finished debriefing me about several other cases.  "Right, I know that.  What's Jeffries saying about it?… Oh okay, I get it.  Well, just tell them I'll be in tomorrow afternoon and they should have that file ready for me.  Okay.  Thanks, Cap."  I disconnected, shut the door and looked at Mac.  "Hi."

Her eyes quickly searched for Harm.  "Hi.  Um, where's Harm?"

I put the phone back in its cradle.  "He ran out to Blockbuster about five minutes ago."

"Oh."  She said nothing, but simply shifted from foot to foot.

"Is there something I can help you with, Mac?"  I asked, going into the kitchen to clean up my mess.

"Uh, no, Harm and I were just supposed to get together and discuss our next case."

"Ah."  I said, closing my briefcase.  "He should be back soon, if you want to wait…can I get you something to drink?"

She shook her head, moving into the kitchen as I got myself a bottled water.  I took a long sip and turned to face her.  "So."  I said, smiling briefly.

"So."  She said, nodding uncomfortably.  "You're a detective?"

I nodded.  "Yeah, work out of NYPD."

"Must be hard."

I shrugged.  "No harder than your job, I suppose."

She nodded again, accepting this. "So you and Harm were close?"  She blurted, her eyes widening at the realization of what she'd just said.  "I'm sorry, it's really none of my business…"

I held up a hand to stop her.  "It's okay.  Yes, we were close.  We dated during our senior year of high school."

"What happened, if you don't mind my asking?"  Mac says, seating herself at the counter.

I took another sip of my water.  "He calmed me down."  I continued at her questioning gaze.  "I was a serious wild child.  Got suspended I don't know how many times, was out every night till about 2 or 3…a real mess."  I chuckled and shook my head.  "But senior year, my counselor convinced me to take this sociology class at school, where the majority of the curriculum was about criminal justice.  I absolutely fell in love with it.  Harm happened to be in the same class to fill a requirement or something, I don't know.  I approached the teacher one day after class and asked how I could become a detective.  He laughed at me outright and said, 'You could never be a detective at the rate you're going.'  I nearly burst into tears in the middle of the classroom.  I bolted out of there and crashed into Harm in the hallway, who had heard the conversation.  He put a hand on my arm and said, 'You can do anything you want, Erica.'  For the first time in my life, I had someone believe in me."  I ran a hand through my hair.  "He got me to realize my dream was possible, so I hunkered down and worked my ass off, trying to make up for all the time I had wasted.  And every time I turned around, he was there, encouraging me."  I smiled.  " Anyway, we were studying for the sociology midterm and he kissed me goodnight, like he always did, but it was different, you know?  Like he lingered a little longer…and then I just looked at him and it hit me like a ton of bricks that I was in love with him.  Or as in love as an eighteen year old can be."

I watched Mac's reaction to this story, and there was an odd mix of love and jealousy in her eyes.  "So what happened?"

I leaned up against the dishwasher.  "He gave me a future, and I took advantage of it.  He just thought I was leaving him.  And to give him some credit, I was, in a way…I'd lived my life so freely up until then, and realizing I needed him to define myself scared the crap out of me.  So I got as far away as I could and started over, thanks to him."  I chuckled.  "He was very hurt and still blames me for leaving, but in the end, it was the only thing I could do."

Mac was silent for a long time.  "Is that why…" She trailed off, not able to finish the thought aloud.

I nodded.  "I think so.  He's always had abandonment issues since his dad's death.  I was his first real love, I guess, and apparently he hasn't had much luck with women since…"

Mac snorted.  "I'll say."

"Which was worse, Annie or Jordan?"  I asked, leaning across the counter.

"Take your pick."  She chuckled and then regarded me with a serious gaze.  "Do you still love him?"

I didn't answer right away.  When I did, it was the God's honest truth.  "Yes, I do.  But I'm not in love with him.  There's a big difference.  Plus, it's really hard when he's in love with someone else."

Mac simply stared at me, mouth agape, so I continued.  "You've had to have known.  The way he looks at you, hangs on every word you say, the way he invades your personal space so much you want to slap him…" I trailed off, watching her reaction.  "That's Harmon Rabb in love."

Mac shook her head.  "He can't be."

I simply looked at her, stunned. "Oh, but he is."

I don't think she realized she was doing it, but she started to play nervously with the ring adorning her right hand.  Then, she stopped and looked up at me with a clear expression, as if the fog had lifted.  She chuckled.  "Wow."

I refilled my water bottle.  "Wow?"

She nodded, not saying any more, but simply studying her right hand.

I've always been a curious person, and I hate unresolved issues, so I had to ask.  "Are you in love with him?"

Her head shot up and for a second, she looked like a deer caught in headlights.  Finally, she sighed and nodded.

My face split into a huge grin.  "Well, hallelujah to that."  I said, raising my water bottle in salute.

She shook her head.  "It can never be…"

I nearly spit out my mouthful of water.  "Hanh?"

"There are regulations, and there's the little part about me being kind of engaged to someone, plus he and I haven't said anything to each other…"

I held up my hand.  "He told me all about that ferry ride in Australia.  Here's your chance not to wait for eternity, Mac.  And as for regulations, doesn't that normally apply to subordinates in the same chain of command?  Technically, you're Marine Corps and he's Navy and you're of equal status.  And as for this Brumby dude, sweetheart, just having this conversation with me has fixed that little problem."

She blinked several times and I started praying I wasn't going to have to use my interrogation tactics on her, which normally involve breaking things and making my suspect pee his pants.  Finally, she looked up at me again.  "Do you think it could work?"

I nearly reared back in surprise.  I found my voice.  "Yes, I do.  Love conquers all, even two scared military types."

She chuckled again and moved the ring off her finger, placing it between her thumb and index finger.  I resisted the urge to ask her if I could put it in the garbage disposal, and watched as she put it in her pocket slowly.

We didn't say anything after that, as Harm came home, whistling.  "Hey, Aim, I got 'Pretty Woman'…oh, hi, Mac."  He said, confused, his brow wrinkling.

I moved out of the kitchen, slipping on my shoes.  Instead of teasing him, I placed a hand on his arm and rose up, kissing his cheek.  "You have a case to discuss, and I have to get back to the hotel.  The Cap wants me back tonight."

He looked down at me, probably realizing I was lying through my teeth.  Instead of saying anything, however, he kissed my forehead and gave me a big hug.  "Don't lose touch."

I shook my head.  "I'll be back to testify at the trial."  I put on my jacket, shaking a finger at him.  "You behave yourself, now."

"When don't I?"  He shot back.

I rolled my eyes and looked at Mac.  "Good luck."

She nodded her thanks, a nervous smile adorning her face.

I winked and let myself out, grinning as I heard Harm say, "Well, Mac, wanna watch 'Pretty Woman'?"

I lean back in my first class seat, staring at the back of the leather chair in front of me.  I think back to the French literature class I took in college, and a quote our professor told us. La Rochefoucauld said, "There is no disguise which can hide love for long where it exists, or simulate it where it does not."  I shift my gaze from the chair to the clouds passing by me and smile when I think of how I'll break the news to my mom that Harm's in love with someone else.  I grin wider at her response.

"That's too bad, dear…well, what about that Admiral Chegwidden of his?"

THE END
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