Part 10

“You said Dr. Weaver would let us know what was going on, Buck,” Tanner said angrily.

“He will, Vin.  The nurse in Chris’s room said we’d know shortly. They wouldn’t even let me in to see him because he was sleeping. Dr. Lawrence was on her way up to give him another one of those damned treatments,” Wilmington told him. The other’s had left to get an early dinner since they’d all missed lunch while waiting for word on Chris. Buck had stayed with Vin to keep him company.

“Hello, Mr. Tanner, Mr. Wilmington,” a nurse Buck recognized as Betty said as she entered the room. “I need to move your bed as close to the wall as possible. They’ll be here with a new patient in a few minutes,” she said.

Buck helped her push Vin’s bed tight against the wall.

“Is the new patient Chris Larabee?” Vin asked but didn’t get an answer as the door was opened and a stretcher pushed in.

“Mr. Wilmington, could you please stay back out of the way,” Betty said as she helped manoeuvre the stretcher into the space between the beds.

“Is it Chris?” Vin asked Buck.

Buck looked around the curtain and smiled back at the man in the bed, “It’s him, Vin," he said.

Chris could hear Vin and Buck talking but it took all his strength to concentrate on riding out the waves of pain. His body felt stiff from lying in the bed all the time.

“Now, don’t try to help us, Mr. Larabee,” the orderly said. “Let us do all the work.”

“Ok,” Chris said as he felt the orderlies lift him and guide him into the bed. He held his arm against his side and groaned as he was moved onto the new bed.

“There you go, Mr. Larabee,” one of the orderlies said as they removed the stretcher from the room.

“Thanks for the ride, boys,” the blond said.

“Hi, Stud,” Buck said as he pulled the curtain back.

“Hey, Cowboy,” Vin smiled from his bed.

“Buck, Vin,” Chris said as the nurse tried to make him more comfortable.

“I’ll be your nurse today, Mr. Larabee. Would you like your head raised a little further?” Betty asked.

“Please,” Chris said and stifled a yawn.

“I’m just going to get your vitals and then you can get some rest. Dr. Lawrence will be here in two hours,” Betty told him as she checked his blood pressure.

“Oh great,” the blonde said.

“I also have to put these back I’m afraid,” Betty said as she hooked up the nasal Canulas.

“Damn, I’m beginning to hate those things.”

“Well, you’re not taking in enough oxygen on room air Mr. Larabee, and until you do, these stay in place,” she said as she put up the side rail on his bed. “Now don’t try to get out of bed on your own either.”

“I’ll make sure he stays put, Betty,” Buck said with a grin.

“Traitor,” the blonde said.

“Mr. Tanner, how are you feeling?” Betty asked as she walked to his bed and replaced the almost empty IV bag above his head.

“I’m fine,” Vin said.

“Keep them both in bed, Mr. Wilmington,” she said as she left the room.

“How are you feeling, Cowboy?” Tanner asked.

“Honestly, Vin, I’ve been better. You?”

“Same, been better but been worse too.”

“I’m glad to see you got rid of that damn tube they had stuck in your chest,” Wilmington said.

“Got rid of the one in my side as well,” Chris answered but didn’t open his eyes.

“What about the one down lower?” Wilmington asked, a sly grin on his face.

“Gone,” Chris told them, a grin on his face as he yawned again.

“Why don’t you both go to sleep for awhile? I’ll stay here and watch your backs,”

“You always do, Buck, you always do,” Chris said as he drifted off.

“Your turn, Vin.”

“I’ll try, Buck.”

 

 

Buck stood outside the room waiting for the others to get back. He wanted to catch them before they walked into the room and woke the sleeping agents. The door was slightly ajar so he could hear if either man woke up.

He heard them before he saw them and held up his hand to stop them as they rounded the corner.

“What’s wrong Buck?” JD asked worriedly.

“Chris and Vin are sleeping,” Wilmington told them, a boyish grin plastered on his face.

“You mean Mr. Larabee is now in residence with Mr. Tanner?” Standish asked.

“That’s exactly what I mean. They brought him down about an hour ago.”

“What about the tubes?” Jackson asked.

“They took them out, including the one we’re all so fond of,” Wilmington laughed. “Dr. Lawrence will be here in an hour so I thought I’d let them both sleep.”

“So Chris is better?” Dunne asked.

“He’s getting there, Kid,” Wilmington said.

“Thank the lord,” Sanchez said as he raised his hands to the air.

 

 

Chris lay in bed listening to the muted conversation that drifted through the partially opened door. He could hear the relief in each man’s voice and knew his family was waiting for the two downed members to get back on their feet. From the feel of his own body, he knew it wasn’t going to be anytime soon. It seemed as if the pain had taken up residence and planned to stay with him for a long time.

“Hey, Cowboy, you alright?” Tanner’s soft voice drifted to him from the other bed.

“I’m fine, Vin, you?”

“I’m fine,” Tanner answered and suddenly both men gave into relieved laughter.

“What’s so funny,” Wilmington asked as he entered the room followed by the others.

“P...private j...joke,” Vin managed to get out between laughs.

Chris held his side as the laughter put strain on the stitches and suddenly his face grew pained as he was taken with a severe bout of coughing.

Vin’s laughter stopped immediately at the harsh wracking cough from his friend.

Nathan Jackson was immediately at his friend’s side and helping him sit forward. He signalled for Buck to get the nurse as Chris’s face grew more distressed. “Take it easy, Chris,” he said soothingly as he rubbed the blonde’s sweat soaked back.

“Chris,” Tanner’s voice was filled with worry as he tried to get out of bed and move to his friend’s aid.

“No you don’t, Brother Vin,” Sanchez said, placing a hand on the younger man's shoulder. “Nathan’s got em.”

Buck came rushing into the room and watched his friend's growing distress. The coughing hadn’t subsided and it looked as if the man wasn’t getting enough air.

“Come on, Chris, breathe,” Jackson said as Betty came rushing in.

“What happened?” she asked as she took over Jackson’s spot.

“He was laughing and suddenly started coughing. He can’t seem to get enough air,” Jackson said as he helped the nurse keep Chris in an upright position.

“Mr. Larabee, can you hear me?” Chris slowly nodded as he tried to control the coughing and take a full breath of air. “I’ve put a call in to Dr. Lawrence and she should be here any minute. For now, I’m going to put you on a full oxygen mask instead of these," she said as she removed the nasal canulas and placed a mask over his mouth and nose.

“K,” Chris said as he continued to struggle.

“What’s going on, Betty?” Weaver asked as he entered the room. One look at his patient told him he had work to do. “Everyone out,” he said as he took his place beside Chris.

The five healthy men walked to the opposite side of Vin’s bed but not out of the room. The curtains were drawn and they had to listen as the Weaver examined their friend.

“What brought this on?” Weaver asked the nurse as he listened to the patient’s chest.

“His friends said he was laughing and just started coughing,” Betty answered.

“Concentrate on breathing, Chris,” Weaver said. “See how deep you can get the air to go into your lungs.”

Gina Lawrence appeared at Weaver’s side and began hooking up the tube for the pneumonia treatment.

Chris shook his head as he watched her prepare the medication. “D...don’t, p...please...” he gasped as he began to feel some control returning.

“No talking, just breath,” Weaver ordered as he noticed the bluish tinge surrounding his patient's lips.

“What’s the reading on his oxygen intake?” Lawrence asked.

“It’s just at ninety,” Betty answered.

Lawrence removed the oxygen mask and pressed the tube into the patient’s mouth. She pushed a button forcing the medication into his lungs and watched his eyes widen in fright. “It’s ok, Chris, this is going to open your bronchial tubes and make it easier to breathe. It’s the same as you were taking upstairs, remember?”

Chris nodded as the machine continued to force the medication deep into his tortured lungs until he was finally able to breathe in on his own. He closed his eyes and waited for the feeling of panic to disappear.

“What’s it reading now?” Weaver asked.

“Oxygen intake up to ninety three and rising.” Betty answered.

“Feeling better, Mr. Larabee?” Lawrence asked.

The pale blonde didn’t bother opening his eyes as he answered with an affirmative nod. He continued to breath in the medication and let his body’s tense muscles relax. The feeling of panic from being unable to breath slowly dissipated and he felt sleep beckoning once again.

“Any idea what caused it?” Weaver asked the respiration specialist as she removed the tube and replaced the oxygen mask over his face.

“I’m hoping it was just a panic attack. He’s doing fine now but we’re going to have to watch him. Keep him on the mask until he’s totally stabilized, Betty. I want him checked constantly.”

“You think we moved him out of ICU too fast?” Weaver asked.

“Maybe, but I hope not,” she said as she watched Weaver check the patient's injuries. “I don’t think he needs the other part of the treatment at this time. Let him sleep for now,” she said as she left the room.

“Make sure you call me if this happens again,” Weaver said.

“Yes, Doctor,” Betty said.

“How is he?” Tanner voiced the question before the others had a chance.

“He’s sleeping right now. Can you tell me what happened before this attack?” Weaver asked.

“We were laughing and he suddenly started coughing and couldn’t breathe,” Vin said, his voice full of guilt.

“That’s probably what brought on the attack, the laughing I mean," Weaver said with a smile. “Don’t feel guilty, Mr. Tanner, the coughing actually did him good.”

“Sure it did,” Tanner said sarcastically.

“Mr. Tanner, the coughing helped loosen the mucus in Chris’s lungs. He just has to remember that he’s weak and some thing’s are a no no right now including too much laughter,” Weaver said as he took in the other men. “Chris is going to be fine but he’s also got to remember that his body is still weak and will be for quite some time. Between the obvious wounds that you can see, he’s still fighting not only the pneumonia but the peritonitis infection as well. It’s only natural that he’d have a relapse and he’ll probably have others. We just have to make sure he’s able to fight it off.”

“Will he be able to?” Vin asked.

“I think you can answer that for yourselves. I’m pretty certain I’ve heard all of you say how strong he is and that he’s a fighter. Do you believe that or was it just something you said?”

“Chris is strong,” Dunne said firmly.

“Brother Chris is a fighter,” Sanchez said.

“I’ve never met another man like Mr. Larabee,” Standish said.

“Yep, Chris is strong and a fighter as well,” Jackson said.

“I’ve seen him come through a lot,” Wilmington said as his mind conjured up images of his friend’s tormented body and mind after the death of his wife and son.

“But will that be enough?” Vin asked.

“That and the medical treatments will help but the main thing is the support of his friends,” Weaver assured them. “I’ll be back to check on him before I leave for today. Gentlemen,” he said as he looked at the healthy men. “Don’t let either of them overtax themselves. They both need to rest and give their bodies a chance to heal,” Weaver said as he left the men to their thoughts.

“Can you pull back the curtain, Josiah?” Vin asked as soon as Weaver was gone.

“I’ll do it,” Betty said as she finished changing another bag of antibiotics. She pulled back the drapes and turned her best intimidation look on the five men standing around her second patients bed. “Keep your stay short,” she said as she checked Vin’s IV.

“Yes, Ma’am,” Buck said a little too sharply.

“You heard Dr. Weaver they need to rest,” she said a little too sharply. “Just keep it down and let Mr. Larabee sleep. I’ll be back in a minute with your dinner, Mr. Tanner.”

“She’s tough,” JD said.

Nathan and Buck walked to the second bed and looked at the sleeping patient. The mask on his face delivered the precious oxygen to his lungs and he seemed to be sleeping peacefully.

 

 

Vin picked at the meal on the tray in front of him. The tiny fare held little interest for the man, his eyes continuously traveling to the blonde patient in the next bed. The lines of strain were evident on the sleeping face.

“Eat, Vin,” Jackson ordered.

“I’m not hungry,” Tanner said as he placed his spoon back in the bowl.

“Brother Vin, do you think Brother Chris would be happy knowing you weren’t eating because of him?”

“No, Josiah, but he’d understand,” Tanner said. “I just wish he’d wake up.”

“I know you do, Vin, we all do. It hasn’t been that long and Dr. Weaver said he was exhausted and that sleep is the best thing for him,” Wilmington said as he picked up the spoon and passed it to the younger man.

“Looks like Chris is waking up,” JD said from the other bed.

“Hey, Stud,” Buck said as he turned and watched the blonde open his eyes. “How you feeling?”

“Been better, Buck. How’s Vin?” Larabee asked through the mask covering his mouth and nose.

“I’m fine, Chris,” Vin said.

“Then eat,” Larabee ordered.

“Yes, Sir,” Tanner said as he picked up the spoon and ate the entire contents of the bowl.

“Buck.”

“Yeah, Pard.”

“Help me out of here, will you? I have to go to the bathroom.”

“Hold it, Buck!” Jackson said as he hurried to the patient’s side. “You’re not getting out of that bed yet.”

“But, Nathan,” Chris tried.

“No! You’ve only been out of ICU a couple of hours. I’ll get you a urinal,” Jackson said as he moved towards the washroom. Finding none, he walked to the door. “I’ll be right back. Buck, Josiah, make sure he doesn’t leave that bed!”

“You heard him, Chris,” Buck said.

“Who’s side are you on?” Chris asked.

“Right now, I’m on Nathan’s side, he knows what’s best for you, Stud,” Wilmington laughed.

“See if I help you the next time you’re in the hospital,” Chris told him.

“Betty will be right in. She’s gone to find one,” Nathan said as he returned.

“Found one,” the nurse said as she followed the Nathan inside. “Let me pull the curtains and give you some privacy,” Betty said with a smile.

“I can do it myself,” Chris told her as she began to pull back the blankets.

“You’ll need help, Mr. Larabee. You won’t be able to hold yourself up. Don’t worry I’ve done this before,” she said.

“Not with me you haven’t,” Chris told her as she finished closing the curtains and helped him sit up a little. He caught snickers coming from the men behind the curtain. He could’ve sworn he heard Ezra Standish taking bets and wondered if he was the favourite.

Betty smiled at the man in the bed before speaking.

 “There are two ways to do this, Mr. Larabee. You can accept my help and use this or we can call Dr. Weaver and have the Foley put back in place.”

Laughter erupted from the others as they listened to the short nurse give Chris Larabee two options he definitely wouldn’t like.

“Shut up,” Chris said as his pale cheeks flamed a startling red.

“Which one, Mr. Larabee?”

“That,” he said angrily and once again heard the stifled snickers from next door. “Not a word,” he said in a voice usually reserved for hardened criminals and people he referred to as blundering idiots.

“We wouldn’t say anything, Stud, would we, boys,” Buck tried to sound serious but couldn’t pull it off.

“Not a word,” Vin said, purposefully using his friend's exact words.

“Tanner!” Chris said.

“All finished?” Betty asked causing more laughter from the others in the room.

“Yes, Damnit, just leave me alone,” Chris said embarrassed by his friends being present and seeing his weakness.

“I’ll be right back with your dinner,” Betty said as she walked to the washroom to empty the contents of the urinal.

“Not hungry,” Chris told her.

“Mr. Larabee, Dr. Weaver can replace any of those tubes at anytime including the feeding one to your stomach. If I have to write in your chart that you aren’t eating, he will do just that. Now do we have an understanding?”

Chris turned his face away as the nurse left the room. He heard the curtain being drawn but kept his eyes diverted, not wanting his friends to see his discomfort.

“You alright, Chris,” Jackson asked as he placed a comforting hand on the blonde’s shoulder.

“No, Nathan, I’m not. I’m sick of this. Sick of not being able to do things for myself. Sick of having everyone think they know what’s best for me,” Chris said as he placed his arm over his eyes.

“Right now, Chris, everyone else does know what’s best for you and you need to let us take care of you for awhile.”

“I know you’re right, Nathan, but...”

“But you hate feeling like you have no control,” Wilmington finished.

“You know me too well, Buck,” Chris sighed. He moved on the bed trying to find a comfortable spot and gasped as the pain became almost unbearable.

“Need something for the pain, Chris?” Jackson asked.

“N...no,” the blonde gasped.

“Truth?”

Chris heard Vin’s softly spoken word and knew he wasn’t hiding anything from him. “Truth is I could use something but...”

“Don’t try to be so macho, Chris. I’ll check with Betty and see if you’re due for a shot,” Jackson said.

“Alright, Nathan,” the blonde said in a resigned voice.

Vin watched his friend, wanting to move closer to him and offer some comfort. He knew how much pain it took before Chris Larabee admitted he needed something to ease it. His own pain seemed to pale in comparison and he wished he could do something to help his friend.

“He’ll be fine, Mr. Tanner,” Standish said softly.

“Thanks, Ez,” Vin said as he looked at the empty tray unable to think of anything but his friend's pain.

“Here’s your dinner, Mr. Larabee. I’ve also got a shot here for you. Dr. Weaver wants us to continue to give you the Gravol to settle your stomach,” she said as she closed the curtain again. “There, now that should help with the pain and the nausea. Try and eat something and I’ll be back to see you before I leave,” she said as she drew back the curtain to reveal her other patient. “I’ve got your shot here as well, Mr. Tanner,” she said.

“I don’t need anything,” Vin lied.

"Orders are orders, Mr. Tanner. It seems a Dr. Midland has been talking with Dr. Weaver. She informed him that you two are the most stubborn patients she’s ever had. She told Dr. Weaver not to bother asking if you needed anything because you’d always say you didn’t. Now pick a hip or I will,” she said with a grin.

The other men left Tanner to the nurse and moved to the other side of the curtain to join Nathan.

“What you got to eat, Stud?” Wilmington asked with a grin as he lifted the lids of the bowl. “Oh, yum looks like some coloured water, green Jell-O and maybe some kinda broth. A real feast for you!”

“I’m not hungry,” Chris said as he looked at his friends.

“I heard that, Mr. Larabee,” Betty said as she finished giving Vin his shot. “Do I need to call Dr. Weaver?”

“I’ll make sure he eats,” Jackson said as he stepped up to the blonde’s bed.

“Nathan,” Chris said, glaring at the medic.

“You going to feed yourself or do I do it for you?” Jackson said as he held up a spoon of the broth to the patient.

“Damnit, Nathan, I’m not a kid,” Larabee said.

“Then stop acting like one, Brother Chris, at least try some,” Sanchez said.

“It can’t be any worse than what I got, Chris,” Tanner said, smiling from his bed.

“Looks like he’s got the same as you had, Vin,” Dunne laughed.

“Well,” Nathan said still holding the spoon.

“Gimme the damn thing,” the blond said as he took the spoon from Nathan’s hand. He pulled down the oxygen mask and sipped the broth from the spoon. Ignoring the growing discomfort in his stomach, he continued till the bowl was empty.

“Jell-O,” Jackson said.

Chris dipped the spoon in the rubber like substance and grimaced as he put it in his mouth. “What is it with hospitals and Jell-O? No matter what the colour, it’s always the same taste and texture,” he said, as he put the spoon down and coughed harshly.

Nathan watched him for a minute and replaced the mask over his face. “Breathe deeply Chris,” he said.

“T...thanks, Nate,” Chris said as he brought the coughing under control.

“You want some of this tea?” Sanchez asked.

“No, thanks,” the blonde said.

“Get some rest, both of you,” Jackson said as he looked at the two injured men.

“That’s all I’ve been doing,” Chris told him as he tried to stifle a yawn

“Well it looks like you’re still tired,” Wilmington told his friend. “It’s after six so maybe we’ll leave now and let you both turn in early.”

“Seems to me you guys are the ones who need to get some rest,” Vin said. “You all look ready to drop.”

“You may be right, Brother Vin. I know I could use a good nights sleep. What do you say, boys, we going to let these two off early tonight?” Sanchez asked.

“I think Chris is already asleep,” Dunne said.

“Get out of here,” Tanner told them.

“See you both in the morning, Vin,” Wilmington said.

“Good night,” Tanner said as the five men left the room. “You really asleep, Cowboy?”

“No,” Chris said. “Just resting my eyes.”

“How are you doing?”

“Been better, Vin. You?” he asked as he turned his head towards his friend.

“Well my sights pretty well back, headaches are almost gone.”

“Your ankle?”

“Hurting but tolerable. Dr. Mercer wants to make sure I’m over the concussion before she lets me out of here.”

“How long?”

“Another day or two if everything keeps going the way it is. She said they’d be taking the IV out in the morning. Have to stay off my foot for six weeks. They’re going to give me crutches tomorrow.”

“That’s great news, Vin,” the blond said tiredly.

“How long are they giving you?”

“They haven’t said. Think they’ll let me go home with you?”

Tanner laughed, “Not a chance, Cowboy,” he said.

“I thought you’d say that.”

“Get some sleep, Pard,” Vin said as he noticed the haggard look on his friend's face.

“Not much point. Dr. Lawrence will be here shortly with her torture devices.”

Tanner was quiet for a few minutes, his voice soft when he finally spoke. “I’m sorry you have to go through that, Cowboy.”

“Not your fault, Vin.”

“I know but I still wish you didn’t have to go through it.”

“Thanks, Cowboy,” Chris said as he settled back into the warmth of the blankets.

“I’ll be here if you need anything,” Tanner said.

“You and Buck always are,” the blond said sleepily.

Vin watched the man in the next bed as his breathing slowed and became even. His worry for his friend far outweighed everything he’d gone through. He knew Chris Larabee was a strong man; he had to be to survive what had happened to his family. Some things a man wasn’t meant to deal with and one of them was losing a wife and son in a senseless act of revenge. ‘I’m here, Cowboy,’ he thought as he watched the older man sleep.

 

 

“Good morning, Mr. Tanner, I need to take some blood.”

Vin opened sleep swelled eyes and looked at then tiny lab technician. “Huh,” he said.

“Need some of that precious red stuff from you,” the silver haired lady repeated.

“Again?” he asked as she wrapped the rubber tubing around his arm.

“Just one today, Mr. Tanner,” she laughed. She quickly finished the job and placed a tiny band-aid over the small wound.

Vin watched her leave the room and turned to see two sleepy green eyes watching him. “Morning, Cowboy,” he said.

“Morning, Vin,” Chris answered sleepily.

“Good morning, Mr. Larabee, I need some of your blood,” the same tiny silver haired lady said as she re-entered the room. She took his right hand in hers and opened the A line that was still attached to his wrist. Slowly she filled the syringe, rinsed it and recapped it. “All finished,” she said as she hurried on her way.

“Good morning, Mr. Tanner,” Dr. Mercer said as she entered the room followed by Dr. Beattie. She pulled the curtains separating one patient from the other.

“Good morning. Am I getting out of here today?” Vin asked hopefully.

“That depends on how well you do with the crutches this afternoon. Dr. Beattie wants to look at your eyes as well. If he agrees, you could be going home in time for dinner,” Mercer told him.

“Great,” Tanner said enthusiastically.

 

 

Chris lay back against the pillow. He listened to the conversation taking place between Vin and his doctors. He felt a pang of guilt as the thought of Vin getting out made him feel lonely.

He listened as the doctors gave Vin orders on what he should or shouldn’t do if he was released that afternoon. He closed his eyes and held his side as he started coughing again. He tried to relax and get it under control but he continued to cough.

“Are you ok?” Mercer asked as she opened the curtain and looked at the patient in the next bed.

“F...fine,” Chris said through a series of violent coughs.

“Chris,” Vin called worriedly as the coughing continued.

Mercer moved to the side of the bed and helped the injured man sit up. She knew some background on the patient and knew he was battling pneumonia on top of the other injuries.

“T...thanks,” the blond said as the coughing subsided and he was able to catch his breath.

“You’re welcome. I’m going to see if Dr. Weaver is here yet,” Mercer said.

“N...no, I’m fine now. H...happens all the t...time,” he said.

“I’d still like Dr. Weaver to take a look at you,” Mercer said as she pushed the button on his pillow.

“Can I help you?” a voice asked immediately.

“This is Dr. Mercer. Is Dr. Weaver around?”

“Yes, Dr. He’s just arrived.”

“Can you ask him to come to Mr. Larabee’s room?”

“Right away, Dr. Mercer.”

“You just relax. Dr. Weaver will be right in,” Mercer said as she went back to her patient.

Chris closed his eyes and waited for the throbbing pain in his side to subside. He felt so helpless when the coughing started and wondered if it would ever end. He heard the door open and footsteps make their way to his bed.

“Chris.”

The blond opened his eyes and looked into the concerned eyes of his Dr. Weaver. “Doc,” he said.

“Dr. Mercer says you’re coughing pretty hard.”

“No worse than the other times,” Chris told him.

“I’m going to listen to your chest and I want you to breathe as deeply as you can,” Weaver said as he picked up the stethoscope.

Chris listened to the doctors talking to Vin. He heard snatches of the conversation and was relieved to hear Dr. Beattie tell the younger man that his eyes were almost normal again.

“Breathe in, Chris,” Weaver said and Chris did as he was told. Weaver listened for a few minutes and then removed the stethoscope from his ears. “There’s still some wheezing there but I don’t think it’s as bad as it was. Did Dr. Lawrence tell you how many more treatments she wants you to have?” he asked.

“This morning’s supposed to be the last one,” the blond answered.

“Did she say that for sure or did she say it might be?” Weaver asked.

“She said it might be,” Chris admitted.

“That’s what I thought. She should be here any minute and we’ll discuss the matter then,” Weaver said. “It looks like your nurse is here with your meds so I’ll leave you to her. I’ll be back with Dr. Lawrence.”

“Good morning, Mr. Larabee, I’m Lucy and I’ll be with you today. How are you feeling?”

“Never better,” the blond answered a little sharper than he meant to. “Sorry,” he told her.

“Apology accepted,” she said as she gave him his meds. “I’ll be back with your breakfast in a few minutes.”

Chris closed his eyes and listened to the soft Texan drawl from behind the closed curtain. He could hear him answering his doctor’s questions and was pleased when the Mercer said the IV would come out that morning and he would be discharged that afternoon.

“Thanks, Doc,” Tanner said as the curtain was drawn back and the doctors left.

“Glad you’re getting out of here, Pard,” Chris said softly.

“Thanks, Cowboy,” Tanner said, loving the idea of escaping the hospital, hating the idea of leaving his friend alone.

“Don’t feel guilty bout leaving me here. I won’t be staying much longer.”

The conversation ended as the door opened and Dr. Lawrence and Dr. Weaver entered the room and drew the curtain closed once again.

Tanner listened as they talked to the patient in the other bed. Listened to the sounds of the pneumonia treatments. Listened to his friend go through another coughing spell and listened as Dr. Lawrence told him he wasn’t quite finished with the treatments.

He didn’t notice the nurse delivering his breakfast tray, his mind concentrating on his friend’s misery.

“We’ll see you later today,” Weaver said as he followed Lawrence out the door.

“Hey, Cowboy, you feeling any better?”

“I’m fine, Vin, just tired,” the blond answered softly.

“Looks like Lucy’s bringing your breakfast,” Tanner said as the perky nurse entered the room once more. “Want the curtain opened?” he asked hopefully.

“Yeah,” Larabee answered and the nurse pulled it across.

“Now you two finish eating and I’ll be back shortly,” she said as she bounced out the door.

“She’s too happy for this time of morning,” Larabee said as he lifted the covers off the tray.

“So what have you got, Cowboy?” Tanner asked.

“The usual. Jell-o and tea. Yum, What did you get?” he asked as he placed the covers back on the tray and closed his eyes.

“Looks like toast, oatmeal, apple juice, and coffee.”

“Trade?”

“Not on your life,” Tanner laughed. He watched his friend, hoping that he’d eat what was on the tray, knowing he probably wouldn’t. “Chris,” he said.

“Yeah,” the blond answered in a weary voice.

“You’re gonna have to eat if you want outta here.”

“I know. Just tired right now.”

“Why don’t you try to eat something and then go to sleep?”

“Sleep now, eat later. Night, Pard,” the blond said as he drifted off to sleep again.

“Alright, Cowboy,” Tanner said as he forced his worries to the back of his mind and ate his own breakfast.

 

 

“Sh,” Tanner said as the door opened and five men entered the room. “Chris’s sleeping.”

“We’ll be real quiet,” Dunne said.

“How are you feeling, Vin?” Jackson asked.

“I see ya got rid of the IV,” Wilmington said with a smile.

“Yep, gettin’ outta here this afternoon too,” Tanner said.

“Well that’s wonderful news, Mr. Tanner,” Standish said. “Any word on your roommate?”

“Nothing yet. Lawrence says he’s gotta go through a few more of those damned treatments.”

“Thought he was supposed to finish with them this morning,” Jackson said.

“So did he but they want him to finish out the day.”

“Looks like sleeping beauty is waking up. Hey, Stud, how’re you feeling?” Wilmington asked.

“Fine, Buck, just want to get out of here,” the blond told him.

“I bet you do,” Wilmington said as he lifted the lid off the lunch tray on the table. “Oh this looks appetizing.”

Jackson looked at the tray and then at the patient. “Chris, you want out of here you’re going to have to eat,” he said.

“Don’t you mean drink it, Nathan?” Chris asked.

“Well if you’d give it a try they’d probably put you on more solid foods,” the medic told him.

“Not hungry right now,” Larabee said.

“Open up, Chris,” Wilmington said as he placed a broth filled spoon in front of his friend's mouth.

“I’ll eat later, Buck!”

“That’s what he said about breakfast but he didn’t touch that either,” Tanner said and felt the Larabee glare turn his way.

“Shut up, Tanner,” Larabee ordered.

“Chris!” Jackson said.

“Damn, Nathan, I said I’d eat later!”

“You’ll eat now,” Wilmington said as he continued to hold the spoon.

“Oh for...”

“Now, Chris,” Jackson said.

“I’ll do it myself,” the blond said as he took the spoon from the other man.

“That’s better, Brother Chris,” Sanchez said as he watched the younger man finish the meagre contents of the bowl.

“Very good, now the juice,” Wilmington said.

“Yes, Mom,” the patient said as he sipped the cool liquid. “Did you tell them the good news, Vin?” he asked feeling a little better now that he’d eaten.

“I did. The therapist is supposed to come in and help me with those damn crutches. You know I really hate those things,” Tanner said.

“I bet you do especially with all the experience you’ve had with em,” Dunne laughed, and the others joined in.

 

 

“All set, Vin?” Sanchez asked, as a nurse wheeled a chair into the room.

“Think so, Josiah, but I ain’t gettin’ in that thing. They said I could use my crutches.”

“You can but hospital policy is you get one final free ride out of here,” Jackson said, as he watched the man in the other bad.

“Damn,” Tanner said as he slid his body off the bed and into the chair.

“Take it easy, Pard,” Chris said as he watched his friend get ready to leave.

“I’ll be back after dinner, Cowboy,” Tanner said.

“Don’t. Get some rest and come back tomorrow,” Larabee said.

“Not a chance, Pard. Ain’t leaving you here alone all night.”

“Vin, I’m fine. You and the guys take a night off and go celebrate your discharge. I’ll probably just sleep anyway.”

“We’ll make sure he rests, Stud, but I’ll be back to make sure you eat,” Wilmington said with a grin.

“I’ll eat, Buck, you just take care of Vin.”

“Sure you will, Chris. I’ll just be here to make it more enjoyable.”

“Come on, Vin, Let’s get you to the hotel,” Jackson said.

“One minute, Nate,” Tanner said as he turned to the man in the next bed. “I’ll be back, Cowboy.”

“I know you will, Vin.”

“All right, Vin, time to go,” Wilmington said. He nodded to Sanchez as they wheeled Tanner from the room.

“Aren’t you going?” the blond asked the older man standing at the window.

“I figure brother Vin has enough keepers. Figured you could use a little company.”

“I’m fine, Josiah.”

“Why don’t I believe you, Brother Chris? I know you’re happy to see Brother Vin leave this place.”

“Course I am,” The blond said indignantly.

“Let me finish, Chris. You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t admit that you wished it was you leaving today.” Josiah had read Chris’s feelings while the others had been helping Vin. He’d seen the look of longing on the other man’s face when they were getting Tanner ready.

Chris Larabee stared at the ex-preacher. The man had an uncanny way of seeing through people. “I hate feeling like this, Josiah. I should be happy for Vin but I can’t get past the fact that I wish it were me. I wish I was getting out of this place.”

“I think we’ve each had the same thoughts when we’ve been laid up, Chris. You’re not the first and you certainly won’t be the last. Get some rest, I’ll stay right here.”

“Thanks, Josiah,” Chris said and closed his eyes. He felt better knowing the older man knew what he was feeling and didn’t hold it against him.

 

 

“Good morning, Chris,” Weaver said as he walked up to Larabee’s bed three days later.

“Morning,” the blond said. “Do I get out of here today?”

“We’ll see what Dr. Lawrence has to say but I’m pretty sure she’s going to be in full agreement with me.”

“Great,” the blond said. The IV’s had been removed the day before except the one feeding him the antibiotics. With the help of his friends, he’d been moving around more and was becoming anxious for his own release.

“You do realize that you’ll still have to take it easy. You won’t be going back to work anytime soon.”

“I just might surprise you, Doc,” the blond said with a grin.

“That’s what she said you’d say,” Weaver laughed.

“Who?”

“Dr. Midland. We’ve been talking about you and Mr. Tanner. Seems you both visit her a lot.”

“What else did she say?”

“She said that she’s arranging your follow up visits as soon as you’re both back in Billings.”

“Oh, great,” Chris said.

“I’ll be back this afternoon and we’ll see if we can’t get you out of here.”

“Thanks, Doc,” Chris said, smiling for the first time in weeks.

 

 

“Hey, Cowboy, glad to see you with some real clothes on again,” Tanner said as he walked up to the window where Chris looked longingly out at the tarmac covered parking lot.

“Hi, Vin,” the blond said, turning from the window.

“What’s wrong, Chris?” Vin asked as he saw the far away look in his friend’s eyes.

“Nothing.”

“You’re not a good liar, Chris. What’s wrong?”

The blond looked at his friend, his eyes misting with unshed tears. “I was just thinking.”

“That’s not a good thing to do in here, Pard,” Tanner said as he sat clumsily in a chair. “Care to tell me what you were thinking about?”

Chris sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the man he considered a brother. Vin was always there for him. Always listened when he needed to talk. The crash had taken its toll on both of them but Chris had spent time alone in the room and a great deal of that time had been spent thinking.

“Chris?”

“Give me a minute, Vin,” the blond said as tried to regain control of his emotions.

Vin Tanner watched his friend. He could see the lines of fatigue and pain etched on his friend's face and knew the pain had little to do with his injuries. He waited for the man to speak, knowing he was trying to compose himself.

“Remember when we first met?”

“Course I do, Cowboy,” Tanner answered.

“I wasn’t very good company back then.”

“That’s understandable.”

“I had a death wish, Vin. I wanted to join Sarah and Adam.”

“Do you still have that death wish?” Tanner asked worriedly.

“I don’t think so. I mean I was sure we were going to die out there. I kept thinking I’d be joining them but I didn’t want you to die. You kept me alive, Vin, knowing you needed me,” the blond said as he walked to the window again.

Tanner remained quiet, waiting for his friend to continue. He knew the other man needed to get a few things out in the open.

“You kept me alive after Sarah and Adam too. I remember thinking I was ready to die that day but you wouldn’t let me. I could almost feel you reaching out to me. Then when you showed up and pulled me out, I wanted to kill you for stopping me. God, Vin, I wanted to die that day so I could join them. Then you showed up and spoiled it. I hated you that day. Hated you more than anyone I’ve ever known.”

Tanner listened to the man’s confession choking down his own emotions as he heard the heart wrenching truth about the day he’d found Chris in a burning building waiting for the flames to consume him.

“Buck could tell you what I went through the day they died. I thought life wasn’t worth living. I thought I’d never care about another person again. Then you come along,” the blond laughed at the less than fond memory. “Thought you were one of the bad guys coming back to make sure the job was done.”

“I remember,” Tanner said as he rubbed his jaw.

“You surprised me that day. You looked into my eyes and I swear you saw into my soul. Somehow you knew what I wanted but you wouldn’t let me have it. You pulled me from a death wish that day, Vin.”

“You’d have done the same for me, Cowboy,” Tanner said as he wiped the moisture from his own eyes.

“Not that day I wouldn’t. I would have let us both die in that fire. Don’t you see, Vin, I’d lost everything. I know Buck was still there but he couldn’t get through to me. I pushed him away because he reminded me too much of what I’d lost. Buck’s like a brother to me, Vin, but you’re closer than that. I don’t know why you were there that day but I’m grateful you were.”

“Chris, I don’t know what to say. You know I don’t have any family. Lost my Ma when I was just a little tyke. Done some things that I’m not proud of. Made lots of mistakes and some of them I regret. I swore I’d never let anyone get close to me again but meeting you that day changed everything for me. I’m here for you, Pard, and I always will be,” Tanner said as the door opened and the others walked in.

“So you ready to get out of here, Stud?” Wilmington asked.

“Sure am, Buck,” Chris said, wiping any evidence of his confession from his face.

“Well your chariot awaits,” Wilmington laughed as an orderly came in with a chair.

“Thanks, Buck,” the blond laughed and turned his eyes to the man on crutches. ‘Thanks, Vin,’ he thought, his eyes once more dancing with childlike excitement.

‘Anytime, Cowboy,’ feeling the resonance between them flow smoothly once again Tanner smiled. ‘Yeah, Cowboy...ain’t lost no more.’ He thought.

 

THE END