With my hand on my belly I was touching my baby to be
and looking forward to the day when you I would see
But then came the pain so sharp and so strong
I couldn't believe that things could go wrong
My baby is growing the heartbeat echoes in my heart
but baby was not where baby should start
How could this happen, when for so long I had dreamed
Please don't take my baby I begged and I screamed
Can you not fix this, can you save the life?
the pain cuts through me as sharp as a knife
They tell me that I will die if it is not done
so instead of two I once again become one
I will always remember that you wanted to be
but you had to go because instead they saved me
I loved you so, and I think of you every day
my teeny tiny baby who got lost on the way
In heaven there are two angels of mine
who were in the wrong place at the right time.
-Kathy Burmer
in memory of Burmer Babies 12/31/97 and 11/28/99
What Makes A Mother?
I thought of you all, I closed my eyes and prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother and I know I heard him say, A Mother has a baby.
This we know is true.
But God can you be a Mother when your baby's not with you?
'Yes you can!' He replied with confidence in His voice,
'I give many women babies, when they leave is not their choice.'
Some I send for a lifetime and others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb but there's no need to stay.
I don't understand this, God, I want my baby here.
He took a deep breath and cleared His throat and then I saw a tear.
'I wish I could show you what your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile with other children and say,
'We go to earth to learn our lessons of love and life and fear.
My mommy loved me oh so much I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom who had so much love for me.
I learned my lesson very quick.
My mommy set me free.
I miss my mommy oh so much but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep on her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek and whisper in her ear,
mommy don't be sad today I'm your baby and I'm here.'
So you see my dear sweet one, your children are OK.
Your babies are here in my home and this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with me until your lesson is through.
And on that day that you come home they'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a mother.
It's the feelings in your heart.
It's the love you have so much of right from the very start.
Though some on earth may not realize that you are a Mother until their time is done, they'll be up here with me one day and know you're the best one.'
written with love for all Mother's missing their baby. -Author Jennifer Wasik
A little bit more about me...
I am 33 years old.
I am married to a wonderful man.
He is 38 years old.
I have 5 children. One is in Heaven.
My other children are 4,6,9, and 11.
My 6,9, and 11 year old are all girls.
My 4 year old is a boy
I am a Stay At Home Mom and A Homeschool Mom.
Hello. My name is Jennifer. I am 32 years old. On August 26, 2002 I was in a lot of pain. I had 2 children(girls) ages 1 1/2 and 3. My Husband took me to the hospital before he went to work. The Doctor did a pelvic exam and told me I had a cyst on my ovary. He took some blood work also. He came back and told me that I was pregnant and because of the pain he wanted to do a ultrasound. I went and had the ultrasound done. The Doctor walked back in to the room and this time he had a nurse with him. He told me that I had miscarried. He told me the baby would pass on its own. He then sent me home. I contacted my OB and they got the paperwork from the hospital sent to them. I went in the next day and my OB took some blood from me. On August 29, 2002 I woke up in such horrible pain worse than it was before. I felt like I was being ripped in half. My Husband called my Doctor and he told him to get me to his office immediately. My Hormone levels had quadrupled since I was in 2 days ago, I was still pregnant.
We got there and the nurse wanted to do a ultrasound. I went to the restroom first and when I got in there I started bleeding everywhere. She did the ultrasound and called the midwife in. The midwife told me that I had a ectopic pregnancy. She was going to give me medicine to obsorb the pregnancy. I told her that I wanted to talk to my Doctor. I also told her that I wanted surgery. She called my Doctor and he got me in for surgery. When I woke up from the surgery, my Husband was there. He told me that they took the baby and my left fallopian tube.
I was 6 weeks pregnant when I loss my baby. The was my 3rd pregnancy. The Doctor did a lap surgery.
I went back to my Doctor in October for him to check me again. He told me that I could still have children and to wait 2 months before trying again. We got pregnant again in December 2002. When I went in for my 1st OB appointment my Doctor told me that my due date was August 29, 2003. This was the exact year to date that I lost my baby! I had my daughter on August 26, 2003. August 26, 2002 was the day I first went to the hospital when I lost my baby. I also had a Son on November 2, 2005. Me losing my tube did not affect me having children at all. Thank God. I will never forget my little baby that died.
Dear Mommy and Daddy
I just wanted to let you know,
That I made it home.
The journey wasn’t an easy one,
But it didn’t take too long.
Everything is so pretty here,
So white, so fresh and new.
I wish that you could close your eyes,
And that you could see it too.
Please try not to be sad for me...
Try to understand.
God it taking care of me...
I’m in the shelter of his hands.
Here there is no sadness,
No sorrow and no pain.
Here there is no crying,
No hurt for us again.
Here it is so peaceful,
When all the angels sing.
I really have to go now-
I’ve just got to try my wings!
-Author Unknown
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