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Personal Stories
Here you will find the stories of other couples who have dealt with infertility, the ups, the downs, the disappointments and joys. It is our hope that other couples will be able to relate to these stories, gain knowledge from them, know that they are not alone. Some couples may choose to share their Email for comments and support, while others may choose to remain anonymous. If you would like to share your story please do, simply Email us and we will post it here.
Assalamu alaikum, I have been through 6 years of infertility. Tubal surgery and hormone therapy for endometriosis. I now have 4, ma sha Allah, daughters. One before all the trouble three after. In between I have had 7 miscarriages. All at various stages from 6 weeks to 4 months. We have tried just about everything except IVF, which at my age (41) is no longer recommended. I had hoped for just one more baby before it is too late, qadar Allahu ma sha faal. I guess it just was not written for me. When I married (at 14) I dreamed of having 10 kids one after another. I thought I could have a baseball team by the time I was 25. It was not to be. Al hamdu lillah, my children are normal and healthy. I am a grandmother now of 1 and 8 and 8/9. My daughter's second baby is due any minute now. May Allah strengthen her and give her a strong healthy normal child. May she deliver normally and return to health quickly. Ameen,
Wassalam,
I married in July of 1996 after looking for a husband for three
years. One of my main drives to marry was to have children, and my husband was also
very eager to have children. I figured we would be blessed with a pregnancy shortly after we married,
that is what everyone thought.
It was a year and a half later, still no pregnancy, that we finally had
insurance to go see a doctor to find out what was wrong. By this time I knew
something was definitely wrong, and I knew I had to get something done. I
had already checked out books, was able to chart my basal body temperature,
I knew there were times when I ovulated properly and some times I didn't,
I learned how to check my cervix position as well as cervical mucus.
I also read up on common infertility problems and diagnosed myself with
endometriosis, signs such as painful relations and painful menstrual
cycles gave it away. My doctor was extremely happy that I was reading on the
topic, it made things easier for both of us, the work finally began.
The normal checkup that usually occurs with an GYN was the easiest part
of testing. No book could have prepared me for the pain I endured during
my first HSG. While the books called it "minor discomfort" I would describe
it as more of piercing a sword through my uterus. The injection of the dye
is not so bad at all, but the clamping of the cervix should give an idea
of pain. I have found though, since we move a lot the doctors changed, that
the pain involved with HSG will vary from each doctor. Dr. Taylor, who was my second doctor, was much easier to take during the HSG. I was not hollering
in pain, but was able to discuss what we saw on the monitor. So pain that
I felt the first time around is not going to happen to everyone.
What I found out from my first HSG was that there was some blockage of
my tubes. This took me to the final stage of diagnosis, laparascopy, or the
band aid surgery. This is when I was diagnosed with Stage 2 endometriosis.
Due to the lack of possibilities as to what our insurance will cover, as
if couples need more worries in this situation, I opted to have major surgery
to take care of my blocked tubes and adhesions. I now have one very good
tube on my right side, my left is not so good but not impossible to work with.
But as they say you only need one..
It was my third month of Clomid along with the active ingredient of cough syrup, a drug called
called Guaifenesin. What this does is help liquify the cervical mucus, which normally should be
very thin and easy for the sperm to penetrate during ovulation (clomid can contribute to a change in
cervical mucus). Many women take their own concoctions
of cough syrup, but for muslims we must watch the alcohol content in such products. I would personally
prefer taking a few small pills a few times a day from the 10th day of my cycle until ovulation instead of
gulping down cough syrup :). Being on clomid it is not unusual when it changes your monthly cycle, the flow,
texture, being late, and a decrease or increase in the amount of days. So at about cycle day 40 when
my cycle had yet to show up and along with a "over the counter" pregnancy test (results negative)my doctor
prescribed a drug that would cause my cycle to come, unwillng as it was. This drug will usually take a week
to take the medication and 10 days after that you should have your cycle. Imagine my annoyance when two weeks
latter still my "little friend" was a no show. I went to the doctors office and had some blood work done, I thought just
nerves. Well I blew my doctor away when I wound up pregnant, not only
with one but twins. Oh yes, if I am to do it... I will always opt to overdo it :). They were born in January of 1999, I went full
term and both weighed in at 6 lbs 10 oz each.
A year later I decided that I wanted to have another child, since I plan on homeschooling during their younger years I wanted
to have children close in age. I again took clomid for ovulation, while some woman will not need to go back to ovulation drugs some will.
I also took hytuss to help the cervical mucus, I did not want to change anything that worked the first time around. After one cycle on clomid I
became pregnant alhamdulillah, we are expecting a girl in Nov 2000 inshallah.
Being an avid reader and internet junky, I decided to search for other
women in my situation. Not only ones that I can relate to on an "infertile
level" but also one in which I share a common foundation of Islam. What I
found was a stigma on women who can't bear children right after marriage
and no one freely discusses this issue. As if it is
not our concern as muslims, infertility knows no religious or cultural
boundaries. As Allah says He leaves whom He wills barren, so we know that
it can happen to any couple. The lack of Islamic resources on the topic is
beyond irritating, and it was then that I decided the web would be a good
place to get us dealing with this issue. With the help of my dear sister
Rabea... here we are. I pray that everyone finds this informative, and we
are able to fight against ignorant type casts of barren couples, become more
sensitive to the issue, and stop down-grading women whom Allah has chosen
to be barren or men for that matter.
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