GOD BLESS THE TABLE!
IT HAS RETURNED!

Unfortunately, a recent turn of events had left us table-less.  But a happy end to this tragic saga has come forth.  The heroic table is back. Rejoice!

A TRAGIC DAY IN WDSS HISTORY:

    We arrived at school one morning and dropped our supplies off in our lockers.  As we proceeded to the intersection outside Mees Sternall's room, we had a sick feeling in the pit of our stomachs.  Something was wrong.  There was no table in sight.
    After an exhausted search, we discovered the kidnapper was our very own english teacher, Ms. Legacy.  She was holding it in a nearby classroom.  stinky-titted whore.
     Careful negotiations were unsuccessful, and it appeared The Table was doomed to a life of her miserable, in-need-of-a-good-fuck lifestyle.  Hope rose when a heroic effort by Judd and Scott liberated the table from her evil clutch, but it enjoyed only one day of freedom as the bitch somehow managed to drag it back in.  At least we had a chance to say good-bye.

A NEW HOPE:

    It has recently come to our attention that the WDSS SAC actually has some pull in the running of our school.  We submitted a request for the return of our beloved table.  If this passive form of protest is unsuccessful, we will have to resort to more serious measures.
 

TAKING MATTERS INTO OUR OWN HANDS:

    Well, the SAC is gay, so we had to do it ourself.  Jim and Bob managed to obtain another table, nearly identical to the old one.  It now sits outside Mees Sternall's room once again, and all is back to normal.  It may not have the same feeling as the old table, but with a little work, three ass-grooves will find their way into the cherry red surface, and that comfy feeling of home will return.

THE INITIATION OF THE NEW TABLE:

    Today the new table witnessed its first memorable incident.  Judd wanted to sit down so he, being thrice the size of the rest of us, dumped peach slushy on Scott's lap.  It looked like urine.  It was funny.  We told people it was urine.  That was even funnier.   Somehow it developed into Tony and Luke giving Scott sixty dollars to piss his pants for real.  But due to his retentive bladder,  it was a no show.