2X12

The Jade Monkey Project

A TWO-INCH-TALL CONSPIRACY IS ROCKING THE GOVERNMENT. CAN MULDER AND SCULLY STOP IT BEFORE IT GETS OUT OF HAND?

Military misdirection? Check. Angry mob? Check.
Antidisestablishmentarianism? Check. Plot? . . . Oops.

If “Seinfeld” ever crossbred with “The Twilight Zone,” the result would be “The Jade Monkey Project” by Jennifer G. This is an X-File about nothing, a made-for-virtual-TV drawing-room farce. It might as well be titled “The Kill Time at Work Project;” the whole episode is one big time-waster, both for the characters and for readers. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Once I got over the author’s audacity at spawning a novella-length non sequitur, I just had to laugh. The point of this story is that there IS NO point, and the message comes across loud and clear. Anyone caught taking this piece, or this series, too seriously needs to go out and get a life RIGHT FREAKIN’ NOW! We minutiae-minded X-Philes tend to pursue little jade monkeys of plot and characterization almost obsessively -- as a critic, I’m more guilty of this than most -- but we need to remember that they’re just harmless trinkets. The only magical powers they possess are those we confer upon them. Sure, the diversion is fun, but there are real cases awaiting our attention back at home. Sometimes we just need a Loogie of Death to set us back on track..

So thank you, Jennifer G., for spitting in the face of fanfic. I know you did it with love.

RANK: 10/10

2X12) "The Jade Monkey Project"
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