CHAPTER 10   I blinked my eyes slowly--once, twice.  As I regained consciousness I came to the astounding conclusion that I was lying in someone's arms.  I rolled over, and suddenly AJ's open eyes took up my entire field of vision, only inches away.  I jumped, but then relaxed as he smiled and his warm eyes crinkled up at the edges.
        "Good morning, sleeping beauty," he said teasingly.
        I yawned and sat up.  I squinted at him sleepily.  "What were you doing?" I mumbled.
        "Watching you sleep...I think you drooled on me."  He made a face, then grinned, and I stuck my tongue out at him.  "Don't you stick your tongue out at me, woman!" Memories of our first conversation floated through my head.  I flopped backward onto the bed.  My eyes drifted shut as I silently replayed all that had progressed since two days ago.  I felt the bed shake as AJ flopped down next to me and heard him say,
"Hey, you aren't gonna fall back asleep on me, are ya?"
        With my eyes still closed, I murmured, "No."  I paused.  "AJ, why did you answer my e-mail?"
        He pondered the question in silence for a few moments.  "You know what? I'm not quite sure.  It was an instinct, I think.  I just read it, and something inside me told me that I had to answer it.  My whole future depended on it.  Something in me just clicked."
        "I'm so glad you decided to click that reply button," I whispered.  I opened my eyes and turned my head to look at him.  The depth in his gaze, the way he looked at me, gave me a funny feeling in my chest.  I didn't know what it was, as I had never felt it before.  I wondered if there was a name for it and then decided that there couldn't be-it was too ambiguous.  This time AJ was the one to break the connection.  He sat up slowly, groaning.  Still rubbing my eyes, I propped myself up on my elbows.  He looked down at himself.  I noticed that he was still wearing the same clothes he had worn the day before.
        "Well," he said matter-of-factly.  "I feel like shit."
        Laughter bubbled up from within me, and it poured from my mouth like champagne, intoxicating me.  It felt so good to simply laugh and laugh and laugh.  At first AJ just stared at me in bewilderment, but after a few seconds he must have decided it was pointless to try to understand me, for he began to roar with laughter as well.  Gradually, our laughing fit died down until we were both merely chuckling.  AJ's eyes twinkled mischievously.  I would have given anything to know exactly what he was thinking, because what he did next completely blew me away.  His smile faded and his eyelids grew heavy as he stared into my eyes.  My breath caught, my pulse quickened-he leaned in towards me.  What are we doing? I asked myself, but refused to answer.  I wasn't sure what the answer would have been, and I didn't quite care.  Strangely enough, I cared even less about its repercussions.  For what seemed like an infinite amount of time, his lips hovered millimeters from mine.  I could feel his warm, moist breath on my mouth, and could hear his breathing in tempo with my own.  I felt a surge of empowerment rise up within me, and I grew tired of waiting.  I closed the gap between us, and our lips met for the first time.  It began softly, our lips barely touching.  His were soft and a bit salty; but there was a taste hiding beneath that was uniquely his.  He was gentle but firm, and I willingly met his challenge and responded eagerly.  Our mouths opened at nearly the same instant, our tongues teasing each other before fully tangling, dueling.  Everything was smooth and natural, like we had been kissing each other for our entire lives-though I had never experienced anything like it before.  This kiss was poetry in motion.  If I believed that a single kiss could shatter the world to pieces, this one would have.
        He ran his fingers gently through my hair, pulling it back from my forehead in a soft sweeping motion.  The flat of my palm rested against his cheek, my thumb rubbing back and forth slowly against the stubble I found there.  A small moan emerged from deep inside his throat that made every muscle in my body tremble.
        Taste, texture, sound and pure sensation all blended into a kaleidoscope of pleasure deep inside me.  Bright colors raced along every nerve ending in my body and burst into the air between us, blending there with his own, mixing and swirling.  We created a new color all our own, shimmery and sensual and distinctly us; I could see its vibrant tones painted vividly on the insides of my closed eyelids.  Slowly, inexorably slowly, we pulled apart, breathing heavily.  Our eyes were locked together as if nothing could ever tear them apart.  It was magnetism, it was primal, and it was very, very arousing.  My head spun with the magnitude of it all, but I gave up on being analytical and just let myself feel.
        "Morning breath," I teased him, smiling.  When he smiled along with me, I knew I had made the right decision when I got in the car and drove to Orlando.
        "Does this mean what I think it means?" he asked seriously.
        I hesitated.  "I'm not sure what you're thinking," I said, "but...maybe.  I can't tell.  AJ, surely you can understand how difficult it would be for me to say it out loud..."
        "I know," he jumped in.  "I know, and I'm not asking for anything.  I just want you to know that I'll still be around when you want to tell me-tell me if that kiss meant what I think it might."
        "Thank you," I whispered shakily.  "It means a lot to me."  I leaned in to kiss his cheek.  Instead I went for his earlobe, kissed it, and then placed a few small kisses underneath his jawbone.  He let out a small moan.
        "Okay, I think that's enough," I laughed easily.  I leaned back and grasped his hand.  My hand lingered in his a moment longer than I'd have liked it to-it seemed like a forbidden pleasure I shouldn't get used to having, or I might spoil myself.  I slid off the bed and rummaged through my bag for some clean clothing.  I grabbed a pair of blue jeans and a short sleeve, blue and white DKNY shirt.  I glanced over at AJ.
        "You know, I'm scared to say this again because I'm not sure how you're gonna react after last time-" he said, grinning, as I shot him a dirty look-"but, well, I still feel like shit."
        I laughed.  "Well, I'd offer you some clothes, but people might wonder about you."  I turned around and headed to the bathroom to change.
"You can borrow a toothbrush if you want, though."
        "Yeah, that'd be great," he replied.
        "Don't go snooping through my stuff, now," I said, fooling around and laughing.
        He raised an eyebrow.  "You don't trust me?"
        "More than I should," I sighed, and closed the bathroom door.  I quickly changed and freshened up.  When I came back in the room, AJ was using some of the water from the melted ice bucket to splash on his face.
        "Well, come on," I said impatiently.  "Let's check out and get my car."  I picked up the last of my things and AJ got his car keys.  We walked down to the lobby and checked out of the hotel.  We got into AJ's car and drove for ten minutes down the street to Pleasure Island, where I had left my car last night.  AJ pulled his car up next to mine, and I opened the door to get out.
Before I could, though, he quickly placed his hand on my arm to stop me.
        "You're not just going to get out of this car and drive away," he said to me, his eyes searching for mine.  "I want this to be easy for you, but it's not that easy."
        "I understand that not everything is easy, AJ," I told him, fidgeting in my seat.  "I'm willing to put effort into this.  That was never the issue."
        "Then what is the issue?"
        "You know what the issue is.  We discussed this last night and I don't want to get into it again.  Where we go from here is up to you."  I moved as if to put my hand on the door handle.
        "I already told you where I stand," he said to me gently.
"Becky...you make me feel good."  I was facing the car door, but when he said that, I spun around slowly and smiled at him, my eyes lowered.
        "Yeah.  I know what you mean."  I opened the door of the car but continued to face him.  "You don't have to worry about me, babe.  I'll be fine...and I'm willing to have you there with me during whatever I have to go through."  I slid out of my seat and grabbed my bag, slinging it over my shoulder.  I ducked my head back inside the car where he was sitting and said, "Call me.  You know the number."
        With that, I slammed the door shut, walked to my BMW and opened the door.  I glanced back at AJ and saw that he was sitting quietly in the drivers seat of his car, not moving.  That was my last glimpse of him before I drove quickly back to Tampa.   TABLE OF CONTENTS CHAPTER 11 HOME