When I was in middle school, I had a romanticized vision of me being raped, then in court, testifying against my attacker. Immediately following the attack, I would have gone directly to the hospital so there would be plenty of physical evidence against him. In court, I would sit tall on the stand, speak directly into the defender's eyes and crisply answer every question thrown at me. When it came to issues such as what I was wearing, where I'd been when it happened, what I'd been drinking, I would respond "I'd be happy to answer your question, if it had anything to do with the fact that he raped me."
I had studied rape cases enough to know that in court, it was the victim (and I say victim because that is what they treat people who have been sexually abused in court as) who was on trial, and there's no such thing as an open-and-shut sex crime case. However, I was innocent enough to see myself as the pioneer, who stopped this evil practice of cross-examining the witness with my pure truth.
It's easy now to see how naive I was then. As much as I studied rape, and as much as the idea of such violation fascinated me, I was distant from the actual pain of it. I took my legal response as the only reaction I would have, and gave no thought to the idea of it impacting my life beyond court. My only fear was how embarrassing it would be to tell my parents about, nothing of flashbacks or a lasting affect on my sexuality and views of sex. Court was a part of my fantasy story-line, to me it was a chance to prove my strength, to stand up for justice. To be a hero.
In reality, trial against a rapist or molestor is not easy or a given. The decision to press charges against an attacker is a deeply personal choice for the survivor and difficult to make. In court, the defense tries to prove the alleged attacker innocent, and is allowed to bring up the sexual history of the victim and anything else that might paint them as unreliable or untruthful.
If the survivor chooses to press charges, it is the beginning of a long and difficult journey. Do not attempt to pressure them into anything they aren't ready for. Going to court is extremely intense, for the survivor is being judged by a jury of strangers who will decide whether or not they are telling the truth. I personally feel it is very important to society that victims stand up and do their best to keep the person who hurt them from doing the same to others. I have not been raped or otherwise abused, so I cannot say if I personally would press charges, but I like to believe I would if only because I still see people who were violated going to court as heroes. It's not always good for the survivor to do so, the pages here are only to help those thinking about it to know what to expect, and if it's something they wish to go through with.