A simple friend identifies
himself when he calls.
A real friend doesn't
have to.
A simple friend opens a
conversation with a full news bulletin on his life
A real friend says, "What's
new with you?"
A simple friend thinks
the problems you whine about are recent
A real friend says, "You've
been whining about the same thing for 14 years. Get off your duff
and do something about it.?
A simple friend has never
seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders
soggy from your tears.
A simple friend doesn't
know your parents' first names.
A real friend has their
phone numbers in his address book.
A simple friend brings
a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early
to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.
A simple friend hates it
when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you
why you took so long to call.
A simple friend seeks t
talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to
help you with your problems.
A simple friend wonders
about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail
you with it.
A simple friend, when visiting,
acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your
refrigerator and helps himself.
A simple friend thinks
the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend knows that
it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.
A simple friend expects
you to always be there for them.
A real friend expect to always
be there for you!