WARNING

Subject: Febreze Is Dangerous to Pets!

I have never personally used this product, but feel it's important to pass this message along just in case it could be true.

Febreze Is Dangerous to Pets!

There have been multiple instances of dogs and birds who have died or became very ill after being exposed to Febreze, a deodorizer/air freshener.

Febreze contains zinc chloride, which is very dangerous for animals.

Please do not use Febreze anywhere near your pets! If you have used it near your pets or on their bedding, clean the bedding/area thoroughly to remove the Febreze, and move the animals away from the area. Please pass this information on to other pet owners/caretakers, before more animals are injured or killed, and find a safer method of odor control.

Febreze: This product is marketed as something that removes odors without covering them up. However, there is a strong smell to it, but worse than that, Febreze contains zinc chloride. Many birds have already been killed after this product was used in any proximity to them whatsoever, and some dogs have >also died.
Other dogs have become very ill without dying.

This product is marketed as safe around animals, and people have sprayed their dogs' bedding to remove the doggy smell, only to discover later on that their dog became deathly ill from it. There is one dog who lost most of her hair after being accidentally sprayed with some Febreze, though this particular incident also had a second factor involved (diet change). The Febreze bottle, as of December 1998, has a picture on the back of a dog, which leads some people to believe it's safe to use in their bedding.

PLEASE READ AND FORWARD THIS WARNING TO PEOPLE WITH PETS!!!!!!!!

Submitted by Ken, Duncan, Ok.
Thanks Ken........

Warning to all !

I just received what look like a run of the mill joke from a friend of mine. The attachment was "Happy 99.exe". I went to open the file and my Norton Anti-Virus Program shut it down.
If you happen to see this attachment, Do not, I repeat, Do not open it! I was lucky to catch it in time and quarantined it before it could do any harm.

Ken

1. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes, when you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. That's where the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight" came from.

2. The sentence "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter in the alphabet. (developed by Western Union to test telex/twx communications)

3. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is: uncopyrightable.

4. When opossums are playing 'possum', they are not playing. They actually pass-out from sheer terror.

5. The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year. When it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

6. The term "The whole nine yards" came from WWII fighter pilots in the Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "the whole nine yards".

7. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

8. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

9. The name Jeep came from an abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle, G.P.

10. The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth II, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that is burns.

11. Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

12. No NFL team which plays its home games in a domed stadium has ever won a Super Bowl.

13.The first toilet ever seen on television was on "Leave It To Beaver".

14. Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

15. In Cleveland, Ohio, it's illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.

16. It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs.

17. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

18. There are an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald's Big Mac bun.

19. The world's termites outweigh the world's humans 10 to 1.

20. The 3 most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

21. When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25 miles per year.

22. Ten percent of the Russian government's income comes from the sale of vodka.

23. On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.

24. In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world's nuclear weapons combined.

25. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer, and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the "honey month" or what we know today as the "honeymoon."

26. In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them to mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's."

27. Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle," is the phrase inspired by this practice.

28. In anient England a person could not have sex unless they had consent of the King (unless you were in the Royal Family.) When anyone wanted to have a baby, they got consent of the king & the King gave them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex. The placard had F. U. C. K. (Fornication Under Consent of the King) on it. Hence, that's where the word ‘F-word’came from.

Donna's fourth-grade classroom looked like many others I had seen in the past. Students sat in five rows of six desks. The teacher's desk was in front and faced the students. The bulletin board featured student work. In most respects it appeared to be a typically traditional elementary classroom. Yet something seemed different that day I entered it for the first time. There seemed to be an undercurrent of excitement.

Donna was a veteran small-town Michigan school-teacher only two years away from retirement. In addition she was a volunteer participant in a country-wide staff development project I had organized and facilitated. The training focused on language arts ideas that would empower students to feel good about themselves and take charge of their lives. Donna's job was to attend training sessions and implement the concepts being presented. My job was to make classroom visitations and encourage implementation.

I took an empty seat in the back of the room and watched. All the students were working on a task, filling a sheet of notebook paper with thoughts and ideas. The ten-year-old student next to me was filling her page with "I Can'ts".

"I can't kick the soccer ball past second base." "I can't do long division with more than three numerals."

"I can't get Debbie to like me."

Her page was half full and she showed no signs of letting up. She worked on with determination and persistence.

I walked down the row glancing at student's papers. Everyone was writing sentences, describing things they couldn't do.

"I can't do ten push-ups."

"I can't hit one over the left hand fence."

"I can't eat only one cookie."

By this time the activity engaged my curiosity, so I decided to check with the teacher to see what was going on. As I approached her, I noticed that she too was busy writing. I felt it best not to interrupt. "I can't get John's mother to come for a teacher conference."

"I can't get my daughter to put gas in the car."

"I can't get Alan to use words instead of fists."

Thwarted in my efforts to determine why students and teacher were dwelling on the negative instead of writing the more positive "I Can" statements, I returned to my seat and continued my observations. Students wrote for another ten minutes. Most filled their page. Some started another.

"Finish the one you're on and don't start a new one" were the instructions Donna used to signal the end of the activity. Students were then instructed to fold the papers in half and bring them to the front. When the students reached their teacher's desk, they placed their "I Can't" statements into an empty shoe box.

When all of the students papers were collected, Donna added hers. She put the lid on the box, tucked it under her arm and headed out the door and down the hall. Students followed the teacher. I followed the students.

Halfway down the hallway the procession stopped. Donna entered the custodian's room rummaged around and came out with a shovel. Shovel in one hand, shoe box in the other, Donna marched the students out to the school to the farthest corner of the playground. There they began to dig. They were going to bury their "I Can'ts"! The digging took over ten minutes because most of the fourth graders wanted a turn. When the hole approached three feet deep, the digging ended. The box of "I Can'ts" was placed in a position at the bottom of the hole and then quickly covered with dirt.

Thirty-one 10-and 11-year-olds stood around the freshly dug grave site. Each had at least one page full of "I Can'ts" in the shoe box, three feet under. So did their teacher.

At this point Donna announced, "Boys and girls, please join hands and bow your heads." The students complied. They quickly formed a circle around the grave, creating a bond with their hands. They lowered their heads and waited. Donna delivered the eulogy.

"Friends, we gather here today to honor the memory of 'I Can't.' While he was with us here on earth, he touched the lives or everyone, some more than others. His name, unfortunately, has been spoken in every public building -- schools, city halls, state capitols, and yes, even the White House.

"We have provided 'I Can't' with a final resting place and a headstone that contained his epitaph.
His is survived by his brothers and sisters, ( 'I Can' ), ( 'I Will' ), and ('I'm Going to Right Away' ).
They are not as well known as their famous relative and are certainly not as strong and powerful yet. Perhaps some day, with your help, they will make an even bigger mark on the world.

"May 'I Can't' rest in peace and may everyone present pick up their lives and move forward in his absence. Amen."

As I listened to the eulogy I realized that these students would never forget this day. The activity was symbolic, a metaphor for life. It was a right-brain experience that would stick in the unconscious and conscious mind forever.

Writing "I Can'ts", burying them and hearing the eulogy. That was a major effort on this part of the teacher. And she wasn't done yet. At the conclusion of the eulogy she turned the students around, marched them back into the classroom and held a wake.

They celebrated the passing of "I Can't" with cookies, popcorn and fruit juices. As part of the celebration, Donna cut a large tombstone from butcher paper. She wrote the words "I Can't" at the top and put RIP in the middle. The date was added at the bottom.

The paper tombstone hung in Donna's classroom for the remainder of the year. On those rare occasions when a student forgot and said, "I Can't", Donna simply pointed to the RIP sign. The student then remembered that "I Can't" was dead and chose to rephrase the statement.

I wasn't one of Donna's students. She was one of mine. Yet that day I learned an enduring lesson from her as years later, I still envision that fourth grade class laying to rest, "I Can't".

Stress Management Imagery

________________________

Picture yourself near a stream.
Birds are singing in the crisp, cool mountain air.
Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place.
You are in total seclusion from that place called the world.
The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a
cascade of serenity. The water is clear.

You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're holding under the water.

There now, feeling better?

Here's another (and better) math trick.
As long as you can do arithmetic, it WILL work for you.
Go get a calculator if you think that you'll neeed one.

PICK A NUMBER from 10 to 100 (but don't tell anybody what it is!)

then DOUBLE IT.

Now ADD 12.

then DIVIDE BY 2.

Finally... SUBTRACT YOUR ORIGINAL NUMBER. (do you still remember it?)

And here's the weird part:

YOUR ANSWER IS 6. (Creepy, isn't it?)

IF YOU RECEIVE AN E-MAIL WHICH HAS AN ATTACHMENT CALLED HAPPY99, DELETE THE MESSAGE BEFORE WITHOUT OPENING THE ATTACHMENT.

You will probably want to notify whoever sent you the message that their system is infected with the virus.

Opening up the e-mail does not infect a system, but opening up the attachment does. Infected systems will automatically propagate the virus by sending a separate e-mail to everyone you send an e-mail message to. The additional e-mail will have the Happy99 attachment.

You can tell if your system is infected by sending a friend an e-mail and asking if they received an extra e-mail with the virus. (You should let them know what you are doing before sending the e-mail so they will know not to open the Happy99 attachment if they receive it.)

Men are like ... newborn babies
They're cute at first, but you get tired of picking up their crap.

Men are like ... coffee
The best ones are rich, hot and can keep you up all night.

Men are like ... computers
Hard to figure out and never enough memory.

Men are like ... coolers
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like ... power tools
They make a lot of noise, but it's hard to get them to work.

Men are like ... remote controls
Simple. Easy to use. And usually lying around a TV.

Men are like ... road kill
They usually just lie around until they start to smell.

Men are like ... soap operas
They're fun to watch, but don't believe everything you hear.

Men are like ... pillows
Eventually, even the best ones get soft and lumpy.

Men are like ... old car tires
Balding, full of hot air, and it never hurts to have a spare.

Men are like ... plastic wrap
Cheap. Clingy. And very easy to see through.

Men are like ... department stores
Their clothes are always half off

Men are like ... horoscopes
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

Men are like ... plungers
They spend most of their lives in a hardware store or the bathroom.

Subject: Y2K Scam

I got a call from a man this weekend telling me he represented my bank and that they were having difficulty meeting requirements to be computer ready for Y2K. He said all bank customers would need to transfer their accounts to a bond account specially designed to protect our money until the bank could fully comply with Y2K requirements.
He then said to verify that he was talking to the proper account person I needed to confirm information about myself, my account numbers and then give verbal authorization to transfer funds to this specially designed account.

I don't trust folks who do this kind of thing so I asked him which of the banks I use did he represent.
He was not able to do that and hung up at that point. Please pass this info to friends or family because this is a huge scam that is going on all across the country.
Some people would be scared to think they would lose all their money (which he said was sure to happen if I didn't do this now) and would supply the information without first checking this out.
I notified the phone company of the call - since I have caller ID, I could give them a number but the identifier just said "out of area." It came from a 248 area code which is around Detroit.
Anyway, just passing this along so you'd be aware and beware. Have a good day.

If you’re buying a candy bar and had your choice of the following, which would you choose?

BABY RUTH
3 MUSKETEERS
BUTTERFINGERS
SNICKERS
HERSHEY'S
ALMOND JOY with ALMONDS
CLARK BAR
GOOD 'n PLENTY
ENERGY BAR
CHOCOLATE COATED RAISINS

OK...now that we have your choice, this is what research says about you!!
And NO... You can't change your mind once you scroll down!!
So think carefully about what your choice will be.........(no cheating).
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Baby Ruth ?
Sweet, Loving, Cuddly.
You Love all warm fuzzy items.
A lit’l nutty, sometimes you need a lit’l treat like an ice cream cone at the end of the day.

3 Musketeers?
You are adventurous, love new ideas, are a champion of underdogs and a slayer of dragons.
When tempers flare up, you whip out your saber.

Butter Finger?
Smooth articulate, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher.
But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time.

Snickers?
Fun-loving, sassy, humorous.
Everyone enjoys being around you.
But you are a practical joker -- others should be cautious in shaking hands!

Hershey's?
Romantic, warm, loving.
You care about other people and can be counted on in a pinch.
You tend to melt and get gushy if held too close.

Almond Joy with Almonds?
Sexy, always ready to give and receive, very energetic, and really like to get into life.
The opposite sex is always attracted to you.

Clark Bar?
You like sports, whether baseball, football, basketball, or soccer.
If you could, you would like to participate, but enjoy watching sports.
You don't like to give up the remote control.

Good 'n Plenty?
You are a very fun loving person, who likes to laugh.
You are fun to be with. People like to go to the movies with you.
Children find you amusing. You are a very warm hearted person.

Energy Bar?
You are very active. You are so active, life is passing you by.
Get a life! Go eat a plum.

Chocolate Coated Raisins?
You go to the bathroom often.

Submitted by, Ken, Duncan, Ok.

Because I'm a guy, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I'll miss a whole show looking for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator.

Because I'm a guy, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a wire clothes hanger and ignore your suggestions that we call a road service until long after hypothermia has set in.
Oh, and when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another guy shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start." We will then drink a beer.

Because I'm a guy, when I catch a cold I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't an issue.

Because I'm a guy, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk, or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "Cumin" or "Tofu." For all I know these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which "feminine hygiene product" is a euphemism.

Because I'm a guy, when one of our appliances stops working I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.

Because I'm a guy, I don't think we're all that lost, and no, I don't think we should stop and ask someone. Why would you listen to a complete stranger-how the heck could HE know where we're going?

Because I'm a guy, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about. The answer is always either sex, football or cars, though I have to make up something else when you ask, so don't.

Because I'm a guy, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to. Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is ok, I don't need to see it. Did you remember to pick up something for my mom, too?

Because I'm a guy, I am capable of announcing, "one more beer and I really have to go," and mean it every single time I say it, even when it gets the point that the one bar closes and my buddies and I have to go hunt down another. I will find it increasingly hilarious to have my pals call you to tell you I'll be home soon, and no, I don't understand why you threw all my clothes into the front yard. What's the connection?

Because I'm a guy, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie. Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't.

Because I'm a guy, and this is after all, the 90's, I will share equally in the housework. You do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, and the dishes. I'll do the rest.

A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole keeps improving by the regular culling of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can operate only as fast as the slowest brain cells.

Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills off brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker cells, constantly making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
The result of this in-depth epidemiological study verifies and validates the causal link between all-weekend parties and working performance.
It also explains why, after a few short years of leaving university and getting married, most workers cannot keep up with the performance of the new graduates.
Only those few that stick to the strict regimen of voracious alcoholic consumption can maintain the intellectual levels that they achieved during their university years.
So, this is a call to arms. As our country is losing its technological edge we should not shudder in our homes. Get back into the bars! Quaff that pint!
Your company and country need you to be at your peak, and you shouldn't deny yourself the career that you could have. Be all that you can be.

USA, Palo Alto, CA (AP) -- "Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive. No further testing is planned."

Actual Country-Western Songs

I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling
I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well
I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better
I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
Please Bypass this Heart
I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here
Mama Get A Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)
I've Got Tears in My Ears From Lying On My Back While I Cry Over You
How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, and I Sure Do Miss Him
Her Teeth Was Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

On average people fear spiders more than they do death.

The strongest muscle in the body is the TONGUE.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

Americans on the average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

Did you know that you are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider?

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.

In ancient Egypt, Priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

Polar bears are left handed.

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes the catfish rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds.

The flea can jump 350 times its body length, that is like a human jumping the length of a football field.

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the males head off.

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. (thankfully)

A cat's urine glows under a blacklight.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain.

Starfishes don’t have brains.

”Neiman-Marcus Cookie Recipe FREE”