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Strange
Dreams
By Eli Moody
I was looking for some books in the library
recently, quite minding my own business, when I suddenly felt a
little odd, as if something was not as it should be. The source,
I found upon investigation, was a zebra who, though he was stuffed,
was looking right over my shoulder as if about to give me some advice:
"Go for the Aristotle, Eli, the Aristotle…man, that guy is funny!"
It was a completely surreal feeling, almost as if I were in a dream
or something; you know, like the one where you are at school and
you know that something is wrong and you can't figure out what it
is, when suddenly you realize that you wore your banana suit that
makes you look like Ray Charles to school, but nobody seems to notice.
I hate to say it, but I have that dream a lot. What? You've never
had that one?
Hmmm…well, what about this one? You're in the shower and you have
that feeling, that "something is not right" feeling, and you turn
around slowly, only to discover that there is a hippo staring at
you through the shower curtain. Or the one where you're flying and
it seems perfectly natural until the stewardess comes into the cockpit
and says that they are out of café mocha and will plain old decaf
be ok, whereupon the copilot quickly decides that life without café
mocha isn't worth living at all and turns into a giant chocolate
milkshake right then and there and there isn't really any other
decent thing to do than to dump your own cup of café mocha into
the milkshake and drink it. Doesn't ring a bell, huh? Well, let
me try this last one on you.
Ever had that dream where you're out in the middle of Siberia and
you're furiously trying to build a fire on the back of this wooly
mammoth that you were able to separate from the herd, but every
time that you manage to get a spark to catch, the mammoth dumps
another bucket of water on you, and you are wishing that you hadn't
dropped the flame thrower that the little man with the funny hat
had told you to hang on to for dear life? No? Well, huh, what do
you people dream about then? Maybe you should go to the library
more often and let the quiet atmosphere and the smell of age-old
books carry you away to more fantastical dreams. And if you don't
mind too terribly much, say "hello" to my friend the zebra.
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