Spy Kids: Saving the
World From Cynicism

By Teddy Durgin
When I was kid, I had a very active imagination. I wanted to be everything from an astronaut to a fireman to the President of the United States. My career goals would change depending on pop culture. Sometimes they got a little wacky. After I saw Star Wars, for example, I wanted to be a Jedi Knight. After I saw Superman, I wanted to be a costumed crime fighter. Heck, I would even watch B.J. and the Bear on Saturday nights and want to be a trucker. Rolling down the highway in my 18-wheeler, my monkey ridin' shotgun next to me, eating at truck stops, and sleeping in the loft of my cab. Places new and ladies, too!
 

That was the life!

Then, I saw my first James Bond film. It was Moonraker. OK, so it wasn't the best 007 adventure ever. But to a then-nine-year-old, Bond rocked. High adventure, beautiful women, saving the world. And the gadgets! My favorite was the watch that could shoot steel-tipped darts. The perfect thing to have on your wrist when trapped in a space-flight simulator gone screwy.

A secret agent. That's what I wanted to be!

Heck, I still do. Now 30, but still with the temperament of a nine-year-old, it was with great delight that I recently got to preview Spy Kids (opening this Friday, March 30). Suddenly, I remembered how neat it was to be a kid and still have so many wild possibilities out in front of you.

Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara star as Carmen and Juni, two kids who have grown up believing their parents were normal folk (despite the fact that they are played by the ultra-cool Antonio Banderas and Carla Gugino). But a dazzling opening sequence shows that Mom and Dad were once world-class spies, who battled evil around the globe. When an international crisis involving a corrupt toy mogul and android children compels them back into service, they are soon kidnapped, and Carmen and Juni are forced to take over their mission.

Spy Kids is a rousing adventure film that kids and parents are going to love. Children will love it because it features two young 'uns who get to drive submarines, pilot airplanes, and strap jet packs on their backs and fly around. They also get to bash bad guys, save the planet, and use cool gadgets like computerized sunglasses and the world's smallest camera. Parents will love the film, because it contains really nothing offensive. No cursing, no adult themes (although I wouldn't mind seeing Banderas and Gugino team up in something more ...uh, R-rated), and only some mild, cartoonish violence. The film also contains some nice messages about believing in yourself and sticking with family no matter what.

Spy Kids is just a light and enjoyable romp. It's not for the overly cynical or the irredeemably jaded. If you want to look at the movie critically, of course it's going to fall apart under today's increasingly negative scrutiny. The action sequences do seem lifted from such other movies as The Rocketeer, The Phantom Menace, and the Ninja Turtle flicks. McDonald's did pay handsomely to have its products very prominently placed throughout the film. And, yes, Carmen and Juni get out of way too many close scrapes.

But Spy Kids is nothing if not ambitious. Something big happens about every five minutes or so. A big chase, a big fight, a big laugh, a big message. The movie is so eager to entertain that eventually it just gets to you. It wins you over. Here's an observation. It's fun! It's good, clean, family fun. And, for the most part, that's a commodity sorely missing from today's cineplexes.

Even better, the director is Robert Rodriguez of El Mariachi and From Dusk Til Dawn fame. While he never shows Banderas going crazy with machine guns or vampires stalking Carmen and Juni through a Mexican strip bar, he does bring his own unique style to the kiddie-flick genre. What was the last children's film you saw that had such a multi-ethnic cast?

The movie just works.

Well, most of it does. When I was a kid, the best thing about imagining I was a hero was that I could defeat a formidable villain. Luke Skywalker had Darth Vader. Superman had Lex Luthor. James Bond had Hugo Drax. Heck, even B.J. McKay had Sheriff Lobo. The child-heroes in Spy Kids, unfortunately, never really get a clear and consistent villain.

If anything, the movie takes too much time in trying to decide who we should boo. Alan Cumming's shady kid-show host seems to be the bad guy at first, only to have a change of heart late in the picture. Tony Shalhoub seems to be a stooge at first, only to emerge as a major baddie when the script calls for it. Even Robert Patrick and Teri Hatcher show up for several scenes, sneering and vamping as an evil billionaire and a cunning double agent, respectively. Keeping everyone straight is confusing, and the movie ultimately suffers for it. Better to have one supreme villain, establish him/her early, then sit back and collect the
action-figure revenue.

Still, there is enough potential here for at least another sequel. Rodriguez has come as close to humanly possible to making a live-action cartoon. Like the best cartoons, Spy Kids is silly and light, full of wide-eyed optimism that even the smallest kid can make a difference. Little girls will imagine themselves as Carmen, and little boys will imagine themselves as Juni.

Of course, all you Dads and Moms out there now have to live up to your kids imagining you as spies in the Antonio Banderas and Carla Gugino mold. I guess you could always lie and tell them you're secret agents. Nah, on second thought, just buy 'em Playstation 2s