10-27-00 Friday

~If there's nothin' missin' in my life then why do these tears come at night?~

Oh...it has been quite the day. Ever since I was told about "The Posse" telling Chris that I'm cute...I've been paranoid around them. They make fun of everything...and I always think they're laughing at me. I don't know. But today...we all ended up in the lobby together. We straightened out (somewhat) the eternal question of "who's Chris and who's Brad". Then we went to lunch. Between laughing...and gawking at some guy who came in...I explained that we need to move in on the posse. We needed to bond with them...so they won't mind so much that we follow them around...and that Lisa stalks Brad...(like I have room to talk.) So we headed back to school...I didn't have to be there...I could have gone home. But I figured we should at least attempt to make some sort of connection with these guys. So we go to the lobby...and find them there. Just chillin'. I honestly don't think it would have happened if Chris had stayed...but he left because he has this thing where he has to get the car and take his mom to work. So he left. And for awhile it was The Posse talking to other members of The Posse, and Lisa, Aimee, and I just talking to each other. But they busted out a frisbee, and were throwing it around the lobby. (it wasn't just tossing around the frisbee...it was violent. Everything they do turns into violence) So we all got involved...and started talking and laughing with each other. I'm glad. Very glad that it worked out that way. I was sitting on one of the orange chairs...and (earring) Chris was behind me sitting on the table. And the guy who isn't a Chris or a Brad (his name is like Mike or Matt I think) was sitting across from me on one of the couches. Well, Chris throws the frisbee to him, and it flys right past my head. He continued to send it blazing right by my face...and finally...I knocked it down in mid-flight and picked the sucker up...ran for the door...he's chasing behind me...and just as I threw it across the Commons, he grabs me from behind...and I screamed. He takes off after the frisbee...and I came back inside. Panting...and they're like, "you should probably hide" so I went in the Auditorium. I hear him come back in, and they're all like, "she went in the bathroom" then I hear him coming toward the Auditorium door...he walks in, and I judo kicked him and ran back out into the lobby. He comes after me...and hit me with the frisbee I think. Then I kicked him in the rear again. That was pretty funny. Now that I go back and look at it...it's kinda confusing. But ya. So we had good fun...bonding with The Posse (minus one) We were invited to the "Posse Party" in Kenton tomorrow. And we're going so Lisa can rape Brad. That's the plan. Ya...and it's going to turn into other members of The Posse hitting on me (I just have this feeling.) and I'm gonna be upset because Chris will probably ignore me. And I'm jumping to conclusions again. It's logical though. When we were on the phone the other night...he's all "I like you. You're an awesome person. And I don't want to lose our friendship. (because I'm the sweetest guy in the world) blah blah blah a bunch more sweet stuff". But when he's with The Posse, he turns into this big smartass. I wish he could be the same guy all the time. (cause if he was a smartass...I wouldn't still be all ohmygoshilikechris) and if he was always an absolute doll, I could pinch his cheeks instead of complaining about how much it bothers me when he acts like a jerk. So ya...we're going to this party.

~How do you do it? Make me feel like I do. How do you do it? It's better than I ever knew.~

So as it stands...I have to work tonight. I should go shopping and find something awesome to wear tomorrow. (hey I've got a gift certificate for Vicky's Secret!!! j/k) I'm just too happy that we at least broke the strain between us and The Posse. I don't feel as uncomfortable as I did before. And I just remembered...I called Chris last night...and he never called back. I was going to ask what was up today...but completely forgot. I would call him now...but no. He won't be home. (yes I know he won't be home...and I think I know where he'd be...in the lobby with Brad) *sigh* I disgust myself. Whatever...he doesn't even talk to me at school. It's so pitiful. Moving on, so Lisa and Aimee told me about *NSYNC last night...they went to the show in Indianapolis. They were both pretty tired today. But Aimee brought her pictures in...there's one with me, Lisa, and Chris in it...we ALL have the silliest looks on our faces. It's so hilarious. I think when I scan them for the picture page...that one is definitely going up. And I have quite a few from the party. Plus...today, I took a bunch of random pictures in the lobby and in Pizzahut. So I'll have to make a seperate page for that...I think I'll call it "Stupidity". I'll be sure to take some good ones on Saturday at the Posse Party. And maybe get a decent picture of Chris...so everyone can see...that I really have good taste. I'm tired...and I'm gonna take a nap before skipping over to work. (oh boy!)

~Get out from under pressure~

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