10-19-00 Thursday

~Just like this~

Today has been great...even though my encounter with Chris left much to be desired...it's been a good day. I'll tell you why. There is a direct correlation between a good day and cool underwear. I have on these sexy dark maroon ones, and so far...they're working. Plus I hung out with Aimee, Lisa, and Rachel all afternoon. I think that helped a little. I have a rough draft to write for English tomorrow, that's not so funtabulous. But I don't care cause I had a good day. I might have to go into work...I'm on-call at 4pm. But I don't care. I blew the last two problems on my math mid-term. Nope, don't care. I think I made Chris mad...and I really...don't give a crap. Ok, that's a lie. I don't want him to be upset with me. But I know I've been dwelling far too much on this. And it's all I talk/think/care about. So that's gonna change. Neither Laura nor Alexandria were at school today. So I sat with Aimee in theatre (purple day) and Lisa, Aimee, and Rach in UVC. Yup, we decided we should go to UVC because Kaufman was going to talk about scheduling. We went...but it wouldn't have mattered if we were there or not. We passed notes through class, and didn't listen to a word he said. Except "specific". He says it funny, and it grates on my nerves. Pronunciation = Spee-cif-ek. UGH! It makes me want to poke my eyeballs out. So we made fun of him...and we made fun of Chris. (I'm not the only one he's been ignoring lately) Lisa says he's become obsessed with his new buddy Brad. (this guy that Lisa thinks is hot...and she asked Chris to hook them up...and he's taking it a little too far) So we don't call him by his name anymore. He's Brad's friend. I think that's what got him upset. Cause we kept telling him how terrible he's been, and calling him "Brad's friend". He's like, "ok girls, I think that's about enough" with this sarcastic grin on his face. Grrr! I just want him to talk to me again. It's so pathetic. So anyway, Lisa and Brad's friend went to chorus, and Aimee, Rach, and I went to Taco Bell. We brought Lisa back a Chalupa in a cup, and she threw it on the floor. I stepped on the back of Aimee's jeans and ripped the bottom. She kept running away from me screaming "NO! You ripped my pants!" We just laughed all day. It made things a lot better.

~Who could be the boss, look up to the cross stranded in the land of the lost.~

Aimee's got me listening to Limp Bizkit. She's obsessed with Fred Durst. (Personally I think Wes is hot) But ya, she's been singing My Generation and Rollin' all week. So the party...is only a day and a half away!!! I'm still excited even though Aj's band can't play. Even though Chris is being a pain, and he'll be there...but he won't be happy. I wrote a little song about it. (well, it's about my birthday, and the fact that it's on Sweetest Day...BLEH)

My birthday...is on Sweetest Day...and my best friend...is throwing me a partay...she says it's -her- party...but it's for -my- birthday...which kinda makes me angry...but she's my best friend...so it's OKAY!

Yup...Sweetest Day makes me mad. Cause I'm selfish...and it's MY birthday. Who made Sweetest Day on MY birthday??? I'll bust 'em. That makes me mad. Cause Sweetest Day = Valentine's Day = mushy love crap = no nookie for me = bitter, jealous Laura.

~Everyone that burns has to learn from the pain.~

So Kir came home for youth group last night. And I just...it was awesome. I miss her so much. We talked about Matt...and it got me nowhere. Because I think she gave him that paper anyway. I hate to say it...but he'll take it...and if he doesn't rip it up in her face, if she's lucky enough for him to read it...he'll take it the wrong way. He doesn't understand things like that. I don't think he'll even care. It hurts me because it hurts her. And I really...don't like the way Matt's turned out. It's like Steve. They both took a turn for the worse, and no one can fix it. Or help them. Laurie was upset last night because Steve dropped out of 2 of 3 classes. He's never going finish college at that rate. He parties...and doesn't pay attention to what's really important. Now I also understand that these boys need people who care about them. I pray about all of this stuff...all the time. But I can't help them. Neither of them appreciate my presence. Cause I was always the one who ruined their fun. And I still would because I don't agree with what they do...and the way they tend to drag others down with them. I have no respect for them and their lack of appreciation for those who really do care about them. And I jsut think that both Laurie and Kir have dug themselves into a hole, and it's gonna be hard to get back out. (I know that feeling, and it sucks...a lot) I know Kir has a hold of the situation. She just needs Matt to kick her in the teeth really good and burn out any feelings she ever had for him. It'll happen. The way things are going...oh ya.

~You make believe that nothing is wrong until you're cryin...~

It's the same thing with Chris and I right now. I won't stop liking him until he REALLY hurts me. That's what I told Andrew...way beck when (4 months ago) He went out with the chick with a baby...and I was like "ya...stupid son of a...dumb...mother...forget you" I'm waiting.

~Satan's kinda like Darth Vader...he walks out of the smoke and pulls out his light saver~

-Kip, it's a light sabar...(he might have said life saver...but still, I don't think Vader cared much about conserving electricity and/or assorted flavors of hard candy.)

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