You should know better


06-22-03 1:19am

~Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe.~

I am SO tired right now. And I should be in bed asleep. In fact, I'm going to hurry this along so I can do just that. I got home awhile ago from a local show. Casey called me around 5pm. I was outside playing some hoops with my brother after a long day of sun bathing. (my life is SO hard) And told me to get in the shower, he'd be out to pick me up for the show in a bit. So ya, that was the quickest shower/getting ready EVER in the history of showering. (I am REALLY tired. I can barely type) So we went to see John Reuben out at Camp Robin Rogers. John Reuben is a VERY old story. Nicole got me into him way back when we were going to church together. So this was like a blast from the past. Like 3 years ago or something, we would drive around and blare this crazy white boy Christian rapper from Columbus out the windows of the car. It was crazy. And so is he aparently. It was an outdoor show...very few people there. The other couple of bands that played were pretty cool. With the exception of the band the sounded like poo prior to John's performance. But ya, remember me mentioning shaking my azz at the Mraz show. It was about 100x that tonight. It was a good time. He's insane live. Bouncing around like a kid and since it was such a small turnout, he was talking to all of us (the 20 some odd people who were actually standing and dancing). Which was pretty awesome. Near the end, he attempted to get all of us to chant "get off the stage!" But Nicole refused. I didn't realize how much she was into his music. So he's like, "ok, that's it! You guys don't want me here so that's the last song we're gonna do tonight." and Nicole's like, "aw. no!" and he says directly to her, "you told me to get off the stage. I heard you loud and clear." and she says, "No I didn't." and he was like, "whatever! You were the first one to say it. I heard you. You were the first one to stab me in the back." and so Nicole started to argue with him and I backed her up. I was like, "she didn't say it! I swear." So they played one more song. Then afterwards, we stopped to talk to him and had like a 15 minute conversation with him about LPC (a local band that did some shows with him back in the day). It was pretty entertaining. He's one funny boy. We ended up giving him the leftover fortune cookies from the wedding. I don't know...it was funny. But Rob took a picture of Nicole and John and myself. I totally snatched his hat just for the photo. He was like, "ew. it's wet you don't wanna..." and I put it on anyways. When I gave it back, he acted like I could have kept it. I should have. Maybe he just didn't want my head cooties. But I got his...so he can have mine too. Ya, it was a good show. Not as good as Mraz. I think I'll be compairing every show to that one for the rest of my life.

~these foolish games we play they make me melt away to nothing. Ohh to nothing at all.~

I will mention the fact that psycho Josh from the wedding was there. That wasn't so great. I basically acted like a total biotch to him. I hate to do that. But c'mon, he's a scumbag. And I don't know what makes him think that he can try and hook up with me. I know I'm not a 10. But he's totally disgusting. Never married yet he's got a kid with a girl that I went to high school with. He's yucky. Supposedly an X druggie. (I doubt the X in that statement) Everything about him is just not appealing to me. I think I said to Casey when he asked what was so wrong with him, "uh, look at all the guys I've dated and or am attracted to. The majority of them are tall pretty boys. He is NONE of the above. With the exception of tall. And that's not the important part." Not that "pretty" is the important part. It's kind of like the Clint situation. He is the opposite of an interesting guy. Dull. We have nothing in common. And therefor nothing to talk about. Which = it wouldn't work. I just think Casey is trying to hook me up with random Tom Dick or Harry because I'm always the odd man out. Which is a valent effort but I think I can find my own Tom, Dick or Harry. (I also think Casey is still stuck on Kyle and I ending up together...also a valent effort but it's been addressed before. And I HIGHLY doubt that will ever happen. Not so much on my side. I'm all for rebuilding broken bridges...) Nicole on the other hand, thinks it's cool with me being the 3rd or 5th wheel. Because I can hold my own. She brought up the fact that Rob will just bring some random girl with him because he doesn't want to feel that way. And I really don't need to. It makes me happy to think that it's ok for me to just be me.

~When I wake up and the day begins do I hold my breath and count to 10? Or will it be 3? We'll see. We'll see. It depends on which day of the week. So I'll sing out. Sing out loud. Just one tiny mutha fucka singin' proud.~

So I'm curious. I know I don't hit my own site 5 times in one day. And Laurie's computer is down. Nicole doesn't have the internet hooked up. So who has been reading this trash? Honestly, I'd like to know. Don't be scurred. Fess up homies! I wanna know who actually comes here to read about the slime that comes from my head. Seriously, I don't care if I know you or not. I never get any feedback, so I'd like you to send me an e-mail or something. Tell me what you think and what draws you here. I'd really like to know. I may even start a roll call section listing the regulars who grace my page. (or not...) And I still want to know who thought it was funny to put my e-mail on the Pac Sun mailing list. For cryin' out loud! I NEVER go in there. A: Kyle works there. B: I have no money even if I wanted to go shopping. Which makes me think...who there even knows my e-mail other than Kyle or Kirsten. I want some answers people. Ok, I'm tired and shooting off at the mouth. It's getting stupid SOOO...On that note, I'm going to go nurse my bruised finger (which still hurts like hell) And maybe put some aloe on my newly sunburned skin. I plan on spending more time in the sun tomorrow. My lil' bro and I have decided to have a bike challenge. We're going to ride our bicycles all over this mofo. If you'd like to join...gimme a holla! It's gonna be fun.

~I'm very much aware of this madness when you talk.~

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