I think I know what my problem is...


06-13-03

"I think I know what my problem is...I haven't been spooned in a very very loooong time." -Mraz

That was the best show I've ever been to in my entire life. I've never been so excited to see someone play their music that I listen to everyday in the comfort of my own home. Incubus wasn't even that good. And I'm still a huge fan of theirs. But the show last night was so fucking awesome. First of all, I wasn't that big of a Maroon 5 fan before the show. I liked their one single...Harder to Breathe. But I downloaded a bunch of other stuff and never really listened to it. Well, right before they went on, it was so damn hot...and Rob and I had attempted to push up front. So I was sweating...and then I started to black out. I don't know exactly what causes my black outs. It rarely happens. But I think it's a combination between heat, sweat, lack of eating properly and locking my knees. It happened at a show with Rob once before. We went to a local show in St. Mary's and I blacked out in the middle of it. He had to practically carry me out of the place. And some guy gave me free soda. So anyhow, I looked over at Rob before I blacked out last night and said, "remember how we were joking about me blacking out at shows with you??? Well, I'm about to do it again." So he grabbed me and helped me down the stairs to the restrooms. There was a chair so I sat down and felt better like 5 seconds later. We went back upstairs and pushed through the crowd. Got about 20 feet away from the stage for the Maroon 5 set. Which was great. Like I said, I didn't really care much for them before...but they were good. The lead singer...my goodness. He shakes it like I haven't seen a man shake it before. He's a skinny little thing. So he just moves it around and ya. That was pretty entertaining. It made me enjoy the show more to see him getting down to his own sounds. Cause you know...some frontmen just stand there and sing. But he really seemed to be enjoying himself. He was complaining about sweat in his eyes and asked the crowd if anybody had a towel or a shirt or something he could wipe his eyes on. Some girl threw a little American Eagle zip up hoody to him and he wiped his face and then put it on and wore it for the rest of their set. OH! The best part! They played the most amazing cover of NIN Closer. THAT just blew me away. Their keyboard player did the thing at the end. ugh. Talk about shocking Miss Laura.

~My intentions are practical inventions. Oh forgot to mention I'm insane by definition.~

So during the set switch, Rob and I pushed a bit closer to the stage. Pissed off some short girls who were standing behind us. They thought it would piss us off to blow on the backs of our heads...but honestly through all the heat, it felt good. So we got about 15 feet from the stage. But I got a great spot. A perfect view of everything. (Jason, Toca and Ian) I've never danced at a show before. All the shows I've been to have been the ones where everyone just stands there bobbing their heads with their arms crossed. But holy crap, I couldn't help but sing every word and shake my ass. It was great. They played all of my favorites including The Dreamlife of Rand McNally with a little twist about taking out the Iraqis and how sexy all the women are in Cincinnati. Then Jason said something about getting his ass beat for saying that. (ya, if I was his girlfriend, I'd beat his ass too) They changed the end...instead of The Remedy, they did It's Gettin' Hot in Here. And some girl took her shirt off and threw it on stage. NICE! But Toca was hilarious. He was wearing a tank top that said something about smoking weed and some sunglasses (hmm I wonder why). All in all, it was just a great show. I was thoroughly entertained but not satisfied with my pictures from 15 feet away. So we headed back behind the venue afterward.

~I always wanted to kiss you but I always wanted to run from you cause I always wanted to miss you and I always wanted to come for you~

They had it all taped up with Caution tape. Like that's gonna keep little 13 year olds from molesting people...right. We stood there for about a half an hour while the crew was packing up equipment. Toca came out. He knew the girl who was standing next to us. And talked to her for about 5 minutes. Then someone brought Jason out with a blindfold on and they walked straight back to the bus. I took a picture of that. It was kind of funny cause he was tripping over cases and he had his hands shielding his face because people were taking pictures and the flashes must have blinded him through the blindfold. So he disappeared onto the bus. Which pissed off this group of guys who apparently came from pretty far away and just wanted to talk to him. I don't know. I was about ready to go. But we were chilling next to the bus gearing up for the 2 block walk back to the car...joking around. And Jason came back off the bus. So we went over and I got a picture of the 2 of us. And that was that. Yes, oh yes, he wrapped his arm around me and pulled in nice and close, cheek to cheek and it was over quicker than a blink of an eye. But...it's good enough for me. That picture will go down in my history books as a memory of the best show I've ever been to.

~Am I part of the cure or am I part of the disease?~

So yes, that was what I did yesterday. I didn't get home until somewhere around 4am. We stopped at exit 15 Wafflehouse for some food and coffee. Then when I got home, I took a bath. My back hurt so bad. So I didn't even go to bed until 5 or 6am. Then Nicole called and woke my ass up at 1:30 this afternoon. She wants me to come to the rehearsal dinner tonight. I don't really NEED to be there. I'm not even in the wedding. But I can understand why she wants to be surrounded by close friends right now. So I'll go. I need to finish my gift...so I'm going to burn that song onto a cd in a minute and then wrap it up with the lyrics really nice. That show was just what I needed though. Like I said before. It was a refresher. I'm not worried about what's going to happen with Kyle anymore. Whatever happens happens...that's just how it has to be. I'd never know what to say to him to his face anyway. So I think I'll just stay away and forget about it. I swear, I make such a big deal about something and then just say fuck it in the end.

~and the words repeat breathing histories and the stories are told and I unfold.~

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